Live in nanny jobs

Trigger Warning
Pay-check to pay-check, barely even that.
I’m 29, only in the last year March 22 diagnosed with ADHD, medicated, and uh oh, Autism attacks. It’s so much more misunderstood than ADHD and irritates me so much when all people say is “oh well their problem!” When people don’t believe in it or that I am diagnosed with both. None of my family understand, believe me or that it exists and won’t listen to me. They won’t even watch a 2 minute TikTok for me.
One of my sisters has a 14 year old nephew with ADHD, ASD and learning difficulties. She hasn’t said a word to me, she hardly speaks to me or my other sister at all. Despite clearly seeking validation that someone believes me and is there for me.
My other sister is a nurse and she is even more horrible calling me selfish and cutting me out of her life and her 5 year old nephews, when I’m just asking for some support or even acknowledgment, messages from my whole family go ignored from when I told them I was diagnosed with ASD every time I’ve tried to talk to them since and dismissed in person.
My parents know I’m suicidal, they saw a post on Facebook I thought was a closed group yet they don’t make any effort to learn or understand how debilitating and life ruining it has been for me. I haven’t blamed them to their faces but I could’ve been someone so much better if they got me help. They said they always knew something was “wrong” with me.
There’s records of my mum taking me for severe panic attacks that started around 7 and I can see on my online records she just stopped taking me to the hospital and the doctors just assumed they stopped so we didn’t turn up, they got much worse. And so many things I think back on and realise it was ADHD/ASD.
I don’t want nor know how to keep friends. I only have my partner of 10 years I live with but I am so sick of not being able to afford anything enjoyable. Just work, sleep, work. I’m severely burnt out. The NHS mental health “specials”knows this and all she did was blame me for for not taking my ADHD medication 3 times a day. - Dexam 10mg AM - Elvanse 70mg PM - Dexam 10mg - EVE
This is for long days I don’t do those regularly nor do I want to take them at home sat with nothing to do. I’ve no hobbies nor could I keep hyper fixated on them. I told her I don’t need to most days and if I do. My insomnia will be an even worse vicious cycle! Still no help of any description “keep a mood diary” I HAVE TRIED SO MANY TIMES I HAVE ADHD!!! And I can tell you it now. Rock bottom.
There’s no support here I lost the postcode lottery. GPs are mostly useless. Especially with mental health. You get sertraline! You get sertraline! You all get sertraline! Eh no I had to tell the GP about Serotonin Syndrome risk with me ADHD meds!
Your know the story history of anxiety, depression, bouncing from workplace to workplace, bullying though out life even at work, chronic insomnia, eating disorders, SH, S Ideation (not acted on yet but I’m getting more and more reasons to do so). One thing stopping me was for my families sake. Now what? My partner didn’t sign up for this. He so lovely but also doesn’t make an effort to understand me. I’ve expressed feeling suicidal so many times he thinks I’m just being factious.
Even with the ADHD meds it doesn’t help my executive functioning or worst symptoms much at all.
The Autism I find much worse, I had an awful diagnostic clinic arrange for me who gave me zero feedback no follow up. Just an incorrect report TWICE I gave up on trying to get it corrected the third time. And told me any follow up/explanation of my report or questions would be £350 a session! Which reminds me I also can’t even afford bankruptcy.
I know there a really no advice to give I just need to vent for those whom might understand. Thanks.

Soundtoys Wrapper Max for Live AMXD 94.86 MB was released on AudioClub. in

I've been having severe panic attacks for months, and it honestly feels like I'm going to die. This especially sucks because one of my biggest triggers is when I lay down at night or when I dont get enough sleep, which is a double-edged sword. I can't sleep because of the anxiety and attacks, but lack of sleep directly contributes to it.
Why do Drs not want to actually prescribe medications like benzodiazepines that help people by stopping these attacks when they happen? Why do we live in a hyper vigilant culture where so many Drs want to play god or be parent and look out for your 'best interests' so much so that they're causing more harm than good by not helping you? I understand there are risks of dependency and addiction with certain medications, but no two people are the same. It's inherently wrong to deny a person help based on a pysicians own irrational fears.
Some context: I was diagnosed with generalized and social anxiety disorder in 2010. By 2015, I lost my brother to suicide. In 2017, my longtime childhood friend was killed in a freak accident. In 2020, my fiance passed away from dka. For years, I was prescribed alprazolam and was responsible, stable, and able to function without constantly being afraid and nervous 24/7. My primary dr retired in 2020 and I haven't been able to find a new Dr that is actually willing to give me the medication that helps. It's just ridiculous that people are expected to suffer in the name of 'addiction'.
I'd completely understand a physican not wanting to prescribe benzodiazepines if a patient is concurrently taking opioid medications or anything else that could cause a dangerous drug interaction. Sure, it's completely rational to expect a person to not mix two drugs that are depressants due to the risk of overdose and death.
In 2021, my L5 - S1 disc ruptured and has grown new bone that is causing extreme sciatica / radiculopathy. I'm looking at spine surgery this summer just to have a normal quality of life again without being in agonizing pain daily. Same situation, though, no Dr wants to prescribe anything to help with the pain despite daily suffering.
We live in a time where it's acceptable for people to suffer. We live in a time where it's okay to dismiss peoples physical and mental health problems.
This is not okay.

My grandmother and I watched season 1 and she fell in love with Joel and Ellie. She loved them, she felt sorry for them, she thought they were perfect together. And then she saw the last episode, and she was horrified. She understood, as a parent, she got it, without question; but she still sat there, unhappy and disgusted that Joel could massacre them all without any hesitation. I let slip there was gonna be a season 2 for the second game. She asked if I had it, because she couldn’t wait, and I said yeah I could play it for her. A whole week, two hours a night, and we got through it. And she started out like we all did. She was happy to see them all living life, a little confused on the friction between J&E, but understood it as well. And then she was horrified and enraged. Not once did she hesitate in cheering Ellie on. Not once did she stop to worry about Dina, or Tommy, they would be fine. Not until the Aquarium. At that point she decided Ellie had gone too far. After all, those two wanted it to stop, protested the others wanting to kill Ellie. Surely they didn’t need to die, right? And then it swapped to Abby. And she saw not some monster, not some muscle headed beast of hate, a cruel creature with no soul; she saw just a girl, haunted by her dads death. Her dads murder. She watched me slaughter the scars, but she agreed the scars were monsters. And then Lev and Yara happened. And she completely changed her mind. Abby went back to help them, and that is not something a ruthless killer does. She protected Lev, and then turned on her own people to keep them safe. That’s.. what Joel did. Abby let her rage and ruthlessness take back over sure, but so did Joel. By the end of the game, she turned on Ellie. Ellie had more than paid back for Joel’s death. But Joel’s death shouldn’t have been paid back. He got what he deserved in the end. Him loving Ellie doesn’t make up for everything else he did, everything he admitted to doing. All the lives he took. And in the end, Ellie threatens to kill a child to force Abby to fight, when abby was willing to help her escape too. Ellie brings a knife to a fist fight. Ellie has become the exact person she hated and hunted. And she’s lost everything and will never get it back. And then the sad, unsatisfying ending happens. And all it took for me to see that was okay, was my grandmother saying softly from the couch “Oh Ellie.. you have to let it go..” to realize the game and ending may be flawed… But so are people. Even if she killed abby, I wouldn’t have been happy. She wouldn’t have either. I wasn’t happy hunting them through Seattle. And abby wasn’t happy getting her revenge either. At some point to just have to let it go, and realize there will never be an ‘even’. And with so few people left in the world, murdering each over for grudges seems like a sad way to wipe out the last of us. And I can appreciate that for what it is.

Euclidean Sequencer Pro v2.1 Max for Live AMXD 370.63 KB was released on AudioClub. in

I’ve been thinking what jobs are at the highest risk in the field of computer science (including data science, machine learning and other related fields) to be automated by AI in the near future?
Of course no one can know for sure, but what do you think? What are your predictions?
Would be interesting to hear your thoughts.

I got fired back in 2015 /2016 for calling off sick and my store manager said that was job abandonment is there a way I can get rehired back at Safeway

I'm new here, please excuse my complete lack of knowledge. I'm here to seek advice and I would greatly appreciate your help.
Few years ago, I purchased a 2ndhand mulberry bayswater in Grey for about $100 and sent it to 'professionals' who claimed they would restore to its gorgeous shade of grey for about $350. It came back in patchy, different shades of grey all over. After putting up with it for 3 years, last year, I finally decided to try a different company who could dye it black and make it look rejuvenated. It cost $450, and the first dye job was half-arsed because they left out certain areas in grey. The company took it back and after a 2nd round, the bag is now black.
However, it is really dry and cracked. and the black paint is peeling off to reveal the grey underneath! At this point, I've spent about $800 on 2 different companies and each time, they took about 4 months to do a shit job. I'm really frustrated and would like to embark on this journey of restoring the purse myself.
My question is- Where/How do I begin? What products should i buy? Is it even feasible to restore the leather myself?
Thank you so much for helping.

If you could live in any country, which one would it be and why?

I am currently a CS undergrad and am very interested in ML and think that MLE will suit me the best. I am mostly fixed on doing masters to get more connections and more importantly for immigration (mostly Canada) and also gives me a possiblity for more research intensive jobs. I want know which masters program according to you has the most job flexiblity to pivot or gives a good edge in MLE or as a recruiter what academic qualification will you be more inclined towards excluding experience?
Also for MLE jobs what skillsets do you consider important and what would you like to see in a entry level graduate's portfolio?
And any advices for ug cs students who wanna enter MLE jobs? And what skills do you think will be good to learn early on?

I just feel a tad conflicted in this and would like outside perspectives. My buddy has been sleeping on the couch for the past month and usually I'm a chill guy and I am all for letting people enjoy what they like to do but now it's starting to bother me a tad. To add a factor to this. He owns the couch, but nowadays I can't even lie back to rest. I can't have a calm all nighter by myself on the couch to play games or smoke and watch a movie. In the evening, If I sit down to enjoy myself when he would fall asleep he would stretch out and take 80% of the couch space and actually put his fucking feet on me or when he is awake, kick me in the sides just to "fuck with me" plus the living room is starting to smell a tad considering he kicks his socks off next to the front door. Am I being an asshole to want him to start sleeping in his room?

I am absolutely no expert; I have never built a PC.
In 2011 I got my desktop PC custom built by a friend. He did a great job. That's why I am still using this 2011 PC now, in 2023, as my daily driver.
What I would like to do is a rebuild. Keep using the case. But change some things in it. The main barrier to this, I gather, is the case. It is a black Antec ATX, the standard boring Antec case of 2011 like this: https://bit-tech.net/reviews/tech/cases/antec-one-hundred-review/1/
Now I run a HDD that's 2 TB. I would obviously like to put in a SSD; I don't need anything as large as 2 TB. Half a TB would suffice. Would my case handle this?
I can give other specs if they matter. 8 GB of RAM [can take 16] , low powered i5 CPU but is quad core. It seems to me that I need to watch these things in a rebuild:

1. Does 2011 Antec Case fit a SDD?
2. Are my 2011 fans bust and need replacing?
3. Is the thermal paste on CPU gone and need replacing?
4. Any areas to look for rust ?
   Indeed it may be the case based on 1-4 that a rebuild would not be worth it and a new PC altogether is better. Note that I run all Linux so I do not want an off the shelf Windows PC. No thanks.
   

What do I do? I narrate audiobooks. I use a Focusrite and XLR microphone. Speakers. I connect PC to a fibre internet box. I don't need blazing speed or power. But a SSD would be very helpful; I backup etc a lot. I might also use a NAS in future.
Please use plain English. I don't know ANYTHING about this.
Thank you

I've watched porn for about 15 years, almost everyday. I'm 23M. I know porn is bad and can become an addiction, for me it did. Anyways, I went 3 weeks, maybe a little more without viewing any porn. I had sex with my partner and masturbated like normal, and I felt pretty good. At first there was a significant difference in my overall mood, then I just felt kind of normal. Tonight, I got home and just decided to watch some porn and I don't know how to feel about it. I'm not disappointed in myself at all, but I just didn't get the enjoyment I used to get out of it. I wasn't disgusted by the videos or anything, and I did masturbate while looking at them. Before when I watched porn, even though it was almost every day, I still managed to live a normal life, I have a job and a good relationship, and I find interacting with people easy. Do you guys think porn is really a problem for me?

You don’t know me, and that’s a good thing, mostly for me. You see, I’m a hitman. Not a bounty hunter, a real hitman. I put people in the dirt for people with the money to make it worth my while. It isn’t a fun job, nor is it easy, but I’ve made quite a name for myself in the underground world, and people know to stay away from me lest I put them in the dirt for free.
Why am I telling you this? Because just yesterday, I was given a hit, paid over five hundred grand, and I know for a fact that whatever on Earth they sent me to kill was not in any way, shape, or form a human being. The person who hired me and the reason for doing so doesn’t matter, but the story does.
I showed up to ‘its’ house late at night, probably one or two in the morning, and scoped the place out with binoculars; no security. I decided I’d only need some night vision, the ricin needle, and maybe some light firepower in case anything went south.
Sneaking through the house, which was very modest for something with such a high price on their head, not making a sound as I inched closer to the bedroom, which I spotted from outside. On the bed was what I was after. I delicately tapped the ricin injector onto its neck, then stuffed it in my pocket and started back out.
When I got outside, I had to walk underneath the bedroom balcony to get back to my ride, and right when I got beneath it, I heard the thud of someone landing on the hard concrete behind me.
I turned around to see what I thought was the man I had just injected with a lethal amount of ricin standing at me, its features masked under the darkness on the face of its silhouette. It didn’t seem to be looking at me, but still said:
“That wasn’t very kind of you, was it?”
I just stood there, hands grasping my gun, not sure what was happening.
“Answer me~”
I didn’t say anything; I just fired a barrage of bullets into it. Its body jerked and flinched as I was deafened by the sound of my own weapon, unable to hear what it mumbled before it raised its hand, stretched it out over ten feet, grabbed the barrel, and bent it into a u-shape.
I dropped it on the floor and watched in horror as it began to grow, its arms, legs, and torso becoming taller, wider, and thicker until it towered over not just me but the house; it couldn’t have been under twenty feet.
Its wrists had sprouted dozens of extra hands, each attached to a long, thin tentacle, which flew forward at blinding speed, wrapping around me and lifting me into the air so I could see the two glowing dots it had instead of eyes.
Then, from between where its nose and upper lip would’ve been, opened its true mouth, reaching all the way around the back of its head and rising up off of its lower jaw, with nothing connecting it to the rest of its body.
I thought it was going to eat me or something, but it just spoke.
“Do you wish for death?”
“No!”
“Then why did you try to kill me?”
“How the fuck am I supposed to answer that! Because I wanted the money!?”
“Yet you say that you do not wish for death.”
“Not MY death!”
“Then perhaps I thought too highly of you, young one. You still have much to learn and many years to grow, so I bid you farewell and a blessed night.”
I tried to ask what it meant, but I suddenly appeared back at my car, a good half a mile away on a cliff overlooking the house, the things glowing eyes watching me before it shrunk back down to a human form and went back inside.
I have no idea what that thing was, and a part of me doesn’t really want to know, but I need some kind of answer. Please, if anybody has anything about what this could be, DM me, because I sure as hell can’t sleep until I have some closure.

I have a lactation appointment on Wednesday and I'm really stressed about it. I am still having a lot of pumping issues. Everything got messed up when I switched pumps and my husband went back to work and I had to move away from my parents and I got a clog in my breast and my dad lost his job all at the same time. Then the feeding routine changed and the pumping routine changed and I'm still trying to figure out how to make it work. Now I'm getting 1 oz per session and I used to be getting 2-4 oz per session and also I'm struggling to do 7 sessions per day when I used to do 8. I'm worried I'm ruining my supply. It's okay that my babies are getting less boob milk for a little while because I can use formula but I would be very sad if I ruin my supply because of this. The doctor was so nice and she helped me out a lot with my clog and learning how to fix it myself. She said that before the baby is 2 months, they can still learn to latch. Babies are 5.5 weeks now. So she asked me if I'm willing to have an appointment next Wednesday to practice latching. I asked her what the benefits are other than bonding and she said that a lot of women find it easier to have the option to be able to breastfeed just 1 time a day and pump the rest of the time, for example if I have to run out of the house without my pump. She gave me the goal to try latching once a day and I'm trying and babies were never really good at it. I know I'm running out of time but I am not sure if I should use the appointment on Wednesday to try latching or if I should prioritize fixing my supply. I think the doctor was saying the baby can do a better job emptying my breasts sometimes than the pump so it should help. But same time im worried insurance only lets me have 6 lactation appointments (used 3 already) and I'm having a lot of pumping issues and I need to pump when I go back to work and what if I can't figure out how before it's time to go back to work and I'm worried I'm making things hard on my husband because he has to work and figure out how to either drive me to the appointment with the babies or he needs to stay home with the babies during my appointments and I have a lot of appointments. Help me decide what's the best way to use the appointment?

I’ve posted on another sub because ı am just after any advice ı can get.
Pretty long story short ı have never felt supported by my parents, specifically my mother. Whenever ı have a problem with someone she always takes the side of the other person. My brother is not in much contact with most of my family because his fiancé has been horrible to me and my sister and she even said some terrible things about us. My mother took her and my brothers side and used to tell me (she has stopped because ı have refused) that ı need to apologise to my brother.
Now I’ve gotten into an argument with my sisters boyfriend, we found out some bad news (my grandfather is very sick) and ı wasn’t in the best mood (was very flat and not excitable) and it lead to having an argument with my sisters boyfriend and he yelled at me and called me depressed (but used it as an insult against me). The rest of my family agree he needs to apologise to me, but my sister is saying that ı need to apologise to him and my mother agrees with her and is saying I’m the problem.
There is MUCH more to this story, and much more to the way my mother has treated me throughout the years. But overall ı just feel like ı can’t rely on her emotionally ever. I don’t know what to do or how to get her to change. I feel like she won’t ever and ı can’t take it anymore. I think ı need to cut contact off from her forever at this point but it’s hard because ı can’t afford to live out of home. Any advice?