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2009.07.23 23:49 brasso Free Games
Standalone freeware, mods, indie, free commercial games, F2P, indie games, open source, closed source, new and old. It's all about free games!
2009.08.12 08:27 surfwax95 TOMT: When you can't remember that…thing…
Can't remember the name of that movie you saw when you were a kid? Or the name of that video game you had for Game Gear? Your Google-fu let you down? This is the place to get help. Read the rules and suggestions of this subreddit for tips on how to get the most out of TOMT. (Located right side on desktop, varies on mobile.)
2021.12.28 01:17 riancb WoTchers
A place for discussion about Amazon Prime's Wheel of Time series free from book spoilers and influence
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2023.03.21 16:58 Jazzlike-Swimmer-617 I lost the girl of my dreams because I neglected her and now I can't see it getting better.
2.5 years ago I saw a girl that fit my type exactly and I ended up asking her out and we hit things off right away to where we agreed to be boyfriend/girlfriend after the first date, the chemistry was that good.
The first year of the relationship I was just kind of a bad person and that led to her crying a lot.
The last 1.5 years, it was more due to me being a bad person that caused her to cry a lot. I put this girl through the ringer, including telling her "I don't miss her" (not with bad intent; I just didn't feel her void in my life yet on that vacation), telling her "you look Amish" after she got all dressed up once (I might have mild Asperger's?; not sure) and more socially unaware episodes like that.
She broke up with me in May after I let my room get disgustingly dirty due to depression, and feeling like I wasn't listening to her. She ended up taking me back after a few days, after I promised to be better with cleaning, listening to her, and trying Adderall. After she took me back, I just remember looking at her with the most admiration I've ever looked at anyone in my life and being so grateful to have another chance with her.
We had a good summer living together; there was a few conflicts because she had to teach me how to do a bunch of chores that I never learned at home. I did my best to change for her and to be cleaner, but I was starting at such a deficit that it ended up causing a lot of problems.
We agreed to try to do long distance the last 4 months and I ended up getting very complacent with our relationship. I would travel 8 hours to see her every few weekends, which I was proud of, but in terms of the long-distance parts when we were away, I totally neglected to Facetime her and didn't really enjoy listening to how her day was. We would facetime for like 15 minutes total some weeks.
There were a few incidents in particular that upset me, like when I neglected to wash her $80 bikini after it accidentally ended up going home with me after our vacation and it ended up getting mold, getting her a birthday gift a few days late (because i was so obsessed with getting the perfect one) and just generally not listening to her.
When she came to visit me two months ago, I ended up losing her prescription at a pharmacy 3 minutes away because I went to a nearby store to try to get her sprinkles for ice cream we had back at home. She said that was a turning point and it led her to viewing me as incompetent. (I have ADHD that I couldn't take medication for due to bad side effects).
Well, after that, we talked for a few weeks after and we decided to give it one last try, where I went up on a first date with her two weeks ago. She said it felt "hollow" and that though she was content, it did't feel right (no shit, we were broken up for 6 weeks) and then the next day I ended up crying in front of her asking for another chance. After that didn't work, we ended up spending the last 2 days together, where I was pretty aloof and rude, which I regret being. I ended up kind of being a nuisance the last two days.
She ended up texting me later saying "before, I never thought the chances of us getting back would be 0. Now, though, seeing how much better my life is without you, it is 0."
As unbelievable as it sounds, I never really acted maliciously, I am just pretty emotionally stunted and immature. Now I'm really down because this girl treated me perfectly with such tremendous patience, checked all my boxes (like seriously, every one--she was out of my league) and I mistreated her to where I will never have a chance with her again.
The way I was raised, a partner was someone you enjoyed spending time with and got gifts for, as opposed to someone that you learn the intricacies of their every day life and learn about their day and bake them gifts, etc.
I'm now realizing that regardless of my next girlfriend, I'm going to have to do that emotional labor anyways and listen to how their day was, but now I'm bummed because it will be the same cost for what I can't imagine to be as good of a reward.
I'm just sad how little of a chance I gave us. I wish I could go back, be on my meds, listen to her, and maybe be cleaner. Maybe then, we would have had a chance.
Now, it feels like I crashed a Lamborghini as a five year old, and now I'm gonna have to settle with driving a Prius to work later (and do my best to forget that I ruined my chance of a Lamborghini).
TL;DR: I mistreated my ex due to some immaturity, wish I had been able to go back and take my ADHD meds and maybe give us a chance.
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2023.03.21 16:43 DebuuuHere My (25F) perception of my family has hugely changed in recent times.
I have been lurking on reddit for a long time so I can kind of guess the responses I am going to get from this.. but if you want to criticize, please do it in a constructive way, please do not immediately start attacking me or my family. I really need to vent. And I've titled every part so you can skip those that don't interest you. I've laid as much info as I thought might need to be less biased.
I am 25F, I have a mother (55+), father (60), and a brother (32). I love Liam (26M). We've been friends for 4 years, been in a relationship for about 1.5 years.
I live with my parents. In our culture, living with your parents at my age and taking care of them is normal.
Background:
From childhood, my mother has considered me her best friend, and so did I. I used to share EVERYTHING with her, and so did she. She knew all my friends, she knew my all my plans with my friends, she knew when & what I was doing - because I always kept her informed about my whereabouts as she seemed to be mostly cool with it. I considered her pretty open-minded about everything, my friends love her. And from her I knew how shitty our relatives was, some in-depth info about the relationship with her & my father, how she actually feels about my brother (long story), and many other "family" stuff which I doubt any mother tells their daughter.
My father is very chill but very protective of me. He has always been a great father who has always gave me & my brother advises about life in general, in every stage of our life. It is always a delight every time I talk to him about any serious issue. He has had a rough childhood which I feel has made him a wise man he is today. I have always considered him to be calm, kind, and understanding, and I have huge respect for him. I just never had that "best-friend" kind of relationship with him. We do have a good relationship, but just not as close as my mother.
With my brother, it is a bit different. we've never gone past the "joking sibling" phase. Hard to explain - I feel okay to joke around with him, but we've never had any serious convo about anything. We'd share the movies we've seen, share new music we've explored, joke about how the lady next door walks like a sloth - but never about how is his job going or why he is feeling depressed and does he need someone to talk to, or why I am crying because I was overthinking some stuff, or how our childhood went together... we never talk these things which now makes me sad.
Liam is who I love. He has been a great friend from the very beginning, he has helped me in a way I never thought I needed help with. I always had self-image issues, my confidence level was low and for that I wasn't doing very good at my career. It is only him that I got to explore the confidence in me, and this is all before we got into relationship.
Where the issue started (as per me):
My view of my mother was always like "she's a victim of injustice and I need to back her up". I always sided with her about everything because the way she usually tells stories, that makes the other person look bad. She has always told me that my father was very doubtful of her when she talked with his male friends, father always got angry when she wanted to spend money on something, other relatives "talked shit" directly to her and they mean bad for her etc. One bad habit of her was this, she used to talk bad about father a lot.
Now, I am not even defending my relatives because I know they're not good people. But for my father.. it was not really believable whenever she said those things, but I believed her anyway. Idk why.
Also my family, ESPECIALLY my mother is very opposed to love marriage. Can't really blame her, she grew up in a way where, at any age, getting invovled romantically with a boy meant a forcefull marriage to another boy which the family chooses for her. It didn't happen with my mother, just pointing it out so you can get an idea of her mindset about love & relationships. She always sees it as a bad thing.
So, as I mentioned earlier, I shared everything with my mother. In 2021, when I first got into relationship with Liam, I thought it'd be cool to share it with my mother. And I did. At first, she was very much acceptable about it. At one point, she straight up told be "I'd happily accept Liam as our son-in-law, i have no problem!" I was beyond happy! Mind you, at that point she didn't even know him, never saw a picture of him.
I used to inform my mother everytime I went with him. She seemed cool with it.
But then idk why, things went south. One day last year, I was about to go out with Liam, and before that my mother was yelling at my brother for some reason. And then suddenly all the heat turned to me. I was the one getting yelled at because I am in a relationship against her will. I was at complete lost. I argued back with her, that he is a good man and you should meet him before coming to any conclusion. She just went nuts. I still went out that day, and after that I stopped sharing everything with her.
A lot of drama has happened after that incident. The very next day, my father, for the first time ever, cried infront of me. Calmly saying "I have shifted my focus from building my career to something detremental and by doing so I have destroyed their dreams" My mother always dreamt that I will get a high paying secure government job, instead I am doing a somewhat good paying job in web development WHICH I LOVE DOING but just in private sector. I am also doing freelancing which adds up to my earning. I have stopped trying for govt jobs because that's really hard to get and I don't want to put all my energy in doing something I don't really want to do. They think I am destroying my career.
Current situation:
For the past year, me and Liam were dating in private. His family also didn't know about me, but he always said that his mother & father won't have any problem with our relationship. And it turned out to be true actually, 2 days ago he informed his parents about me and I talked with his mother over a phone call. She made it clear that if me & Liam are sure and think that we can live with each other, they don't have any kind of problem with me.
I told my mother last week about talking to Liam. She agreed but said she will only talk to his parents. I was like "okay" and then arranged a call with them. She talked with his mother, the conversation was going good. At one point I heard she said "Oh I am so greatful that I have a friend now!" and Liam's mother laughed. I was beyond happy that my mother was finally convinced!
But after she put the phone down, she went to trash talk about Liam's mother. "His mother will be viscious mother-in-law, I know it. She will make you (me) work like a slave and I know you will not get to keep your job after marriage. They will make your life hell" so on and so forth.
Before all this, me & Liam have had very long and multiple conversations about all stuff like - if his family has any problem with me working after marriage, if his family expects me to cook for the whole family without any help at first, does his family supports love marriage, will his family expect me to cut ties with my parents after marriage. if his family likes girls at all (he is a single child), how financially stable we need to be in the long terms, how we're going to handle finances, investing and stuff, we've talked about our children, our medical conditions... like all the stuff that we consider is vital for a marriage. So I was pretty clear about him, and so was he.
It baffles me how after 3 days of talking to his mother, my mother still continues to say bitter things about him, his family, his neighbours even, without even knowing him properly! I don't know, I feel to distant with her. I am not angry with her in any way, I truely understand where she's coming from. I am just disappointed in her that she's not even considering that I love him, before saying all that hurtful things.
And my father, he has finally accepted my decision. Though he is not in full support of it, he says to me "Just make sure you're happy afterward. Because that is the only thing my heart wants to see".
The part that changed my perception:
During all these situation, I have got to talk with my father a lot. I have realised how much similarity Liam and my father has, which makes my heart warm for some reason.
My father has given me advises that I hope my mother would have gave me. Now that I am considering marrying Liam, my father told about his own experiece after marriage. He told me how understanding we both (Liam & I) have to be in order to have a healthy marriage. How I need to handle the bad days because they are inevitable. How we both should handle different opinions, different views. How I should be respectable to his parents as I am to my parents.. and many other things he told me yesterday.
During which, he mentioned, that jealousy is a valid emotion in a marriage, especially in the beginning. He said, Liam will and have all the rights to get jealous if you spend time with you male friends alone and without his knowledge. And vice versa. An example he gave, how my mother argued with him when he talked to a female infront of my mother, and my mother got sooooo angry that they argued like crazy.
That made my head go upside down.
I always thought my mother was the "open minded" one. SHE was the victim of being doubted with male friends, SHE was the one with whom father would argue because of it.
Mind you, my father don't know about the stuff my mother used to tell. He then continue to told other things also, which then made very much sense to me.
I remember I have heard my mother twist some words about some things to my father, and my father being upset and I never understood why.
I remember she saying about a person that "he's bragging about his son being in medical field so that I can be jealous" to which I thought he was just informing about his son, not bragging, because it was my mother who asked about his son.
Recently, she straight up villainized Liam's mother. Because as per her, Liam's mother rudely said "I don't want your agreement in our children's marriage" which is straight up lie! I was their when they were talking over a phone and the way Liam's mother said it to my mother was "actually I think they are old enough to decide for themselves, and I don't think Liam needs my permission to do what he wants" that was what Liam's mother said.
My mother, after the call, was furious about it. And I said it to her "may be you've misunderstood" and then my mother proceeds to tell me that "Oh now I am the liar?? She's the good one, I am the bad one??" And then smiled sarcastically and went away. I felt so horrible about it.
My brother:
There's nothing to mention about him, really. He's a 32 year old, doing everything my mother says, have a unreasonably high temper which gets triggered by smallest things, posts sad content on Facebook and bitches about a neighbors to my mother. That's it.
Unaspiringly he opposes the relationship as well. He had one relation which failed because my mom interfered in his life. The girl wasn't good in my opinion but I think it should have been him to end it all, instead of my mother getting involved unreasonably. He was 26-27 at that time so he should have been more than capable of this.
After thought:
I am not villainizing my mother. She is my mother and I love her, very much that I am willing to do everything to care for her and get the life she wanted from her childhood. I look for her when I get back home, I look for her the first thing when I get up in morning, I look for the regular tea breaks in afternoon where we used to gossip about stuff and laugh together.
But I am honestly tired of feeling guilty over the expectation my mother have of me. Overtime, I did something that is out of her expectations, she made sure that I know she's upset. I felt horrible every time, I felt I don't deserve to live even. I have gotten so depressed over it 2 years ago, that I had to take 1 week leave from office just to sit in house and think about how horrible daughters I am.
Mom, just so you know, I have gotten over it. I have gotten over the guilt that I have trapped myself in for a very long period of time. I might regret my decision to marry Liam against your will in future, or not, I don't know. But I sure as hell know that when the time comes that I have to leave this house, I will miss you. A lot. I cried last night just thinking about a life without your voice, your ocaasional kiss on my forehead, the way you fix my dress before a big event even though we argued prior to that. I know that I care about you from the bottom of my heart, and I hope that one day you see the light in all your dark & negative thoughts. I love you.
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2023.03.21 16:34 MikeRithchinMan Different culture issues.
Hi, I've been in a relationship with my GF about 2 years now. It's been mostly good, but there are some issues.
We're from different cultures, but that mostly isn't an issue. The largest issue is her parents do not accept me as I am not from theirs, so they have gone no contact with her. That is a huge issue, but we're dealing with it the best we can.
Second issue is, I've always been very open about my life and discuss things with people freely, asking for advice from people I love and trust. She is not that way, and prefers things to be private between us. This has led to me, unfairly, complaining about her to people in my life, which caused a huge rift. I'm promising not to do that, and hopefully this advice request does not violate the spirit of that... But it feels weird not to be able to talk to my family about my life.
Last big issue is, she read my text messages to a friend while I was sleeping one night, and found me complaining to him about her(before I really realized the harm it was doing. I get it now), and he was also complaining about women, and used a phrase like "I'm tired of these hoes", basically conveying he was tired of women in general. When she read this, she took it as him calling her a whore and me not standing up for her. It was course inappropriate language, but I do not believe he meant it personally against her. She does not want to see him because of this, and I feel she does not want me to, but he is my best friend of 15+ years at this point. I am unsure what the resolution is. We both want to continue the relationship, as we have a very good one in general, but she seems a bit more unhappy recently. I just am unsure what to do. Can I salvage the friendship and relationship?
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2023.03.21 16:04 Liquid_Gold- Things were going great until a few days ago
So I’ve been battling with both anxiety and depression for the last seven years and last six months, I felt good better than I have in a long long time. But I don’t know what’s going on, but I suddenly feel like nothing is worth it anymore.
I’ve been ignoring everything assignments tests just staying in my room and laying in bed. I even skipped my classes today.
I don’t know if this matters or something, but my closest friend is basically going through a mental breakdown and it just reminds me of myself and the situation I was in a couple of years ago.
And she’s the only person currently that I could talk to because the people I trusted before we’ve kind of lost touch, and I don’t know how to talk to her without making things worse for her.
I wish there is someone I could talk to, but at the same time I have really really bad trust issues and I don’t open up to people. The last person apart from my friends that I let in broke my heart, so people are not really my favourite right now.
I just need something, I don’t know what but I just want to feel better. I was doing so well and I hate feeling so empty. I hate feeling like I don’t care because I care. Just can’t get myself to do anything about it. I don’t know what to do I just want this to go away.
I haven’t felt like this in a year. Even then I didn’t feel this bad. I can’t seem to figure out why I’m just so unaffected by anything rn. I don’t know what triggered me.
I’ve cried all morning and honestly I hate being vulnerable I just don’t want to feel this awful anymore.
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2023.03.21 14:00 ChangesOfTheMoonman My karma may help others as others will be helped
On Reddit, where the karma flows, Some users seek to climb the rose By whoring karma every day, In search of validation's sway.
They post and post, without a care, Of cat videos and memes so rare, In hopes that upvotes they will gain, And feel the thrill of karma's reign.
But what they fail to understand, Is that karma is not just a brand, It's meant to be a measure fair, Of quality content and its flair.
To karma whore is to deceive, To take without giving, to receive The validation that we all crave, But in a way that's less than brave.
So let us all take care to see, That karma is not a guarantee, But a reflection of our worth, And how we contribute to the earth.
Let us post with intention true, To inform, inspire, and renew, And let the karma come in time, As a testament to what's sublime.
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2023.03.21 11:49 Puzzleheaded-Cry-946 Daily blog 8
“Notwithstanding ye would not go up, but rebelled against the commandment of the Lord your God: And ye murmured in your tents, and said, Because the Lord hated us, he hath brought us forth out of the land of Egypt, to deliver us into the hand of the Amorites, to destroy us.” Deuteronomy 1:26-27 KJV
I thought this was a good set of verses from the Old Testament and we can apply all scripture to our life Old Testament, or New Testament obviously the old testament was to the Jews at the time, but God gives us the old testament for our knowledge and to help learn from Israel. So one way we can apply this to our life. It’s just because you’re facing trials or Temptations, or are going through something hard in life not to charge God, foolishly, and murmurs that God has forsaken us, or left us, or doesn’t know what he’s doing. Our job isn’t to question but it’s to trust God without faith it is impossible to please him.
I will take just a couple verses from the book of Job Chapter 39 as we know, Job faced a lot of problems, and he lost a lot in his life more so than most of us have, and ever will, and in the verses and chapters leading up to chapter 39 Job was questioning God of why he would allow these things and here was God’s response in the first couple versus of chapter 39 “Knowest thou the time when the wild goats of the rock bring forth? or canst thou mark when the hinds do calve? Canst thou number the months that they fulfil? or knowest thou the time when they bring forth?” Job 39:1-2 KJV
It’s funny because God doesn’t actually give him a specific reason why but what he does show Job is that a God is in control of everything and knows everything. Why should we therefore question what God is doing. See we may not understand why something is going on in our life now, but there’s always a plan and a purpose for it and God is just in holy and who are we to question what he does. Therefore trust God, and live by faith.
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2023.03.21 11:17 goldifyappllp Invest Smartly in Gold on Gudi Padwa
| Celebrated in the spring season, Gudi Padwa is an important festival of Konkani and Marathi Hindus. It marks the traditional new year for them according to the lunisolar method. Interestingly, New Year’s Day is celebrated on the same day as Putthandu in Tamil Nadu, Ugadi in Karnataka and Andhra Pradesh, and Cheti Chand of the Sindhi community around the world. It is common to see numerous Gudi arrangements in every household that celebrates the festival. A yellow cloth is tied to the top of a pole and decorated with strings of sugar crystals along with garlands of flowers and mango leaves. A silver or copper vessel is placed in an inverted position atop the pole. This is the ‘Gudi’ that adorns the entrance of homes at this time. Gold and Gudi Padwa: A timeless tradition Festivals are considered an auspicious occasion to buy gold in Hindu tradition. Gudi Padwa is no different, and buying gold on this auspicious day is believed to bring prosperity and wealth. People buy different types of traditional gold jewellery on this day but the Maharashtrian nath or nose jewellery is one of the community’s most prized possessions, and Gudi Padwa is a good day to invest in these. Apart from gold being a store of value, it is also considered a safe haven. This is because inflation rears its head during uncertain times, which reduces the value of paper currencies. Gold, on the other hand, cannot be devalued like the currency. So, the yellow metal can effectively protect the portfolio against inflation. https://preview.redd.it/bkj18pnci2pa1.jpg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=91dbebde512514fe407571fd28931db637ae5edc How to invest in gold this Gudi Padwa Jewellery is the most popular form of gold that is purchased during Gudi Padwa. one’s investments is to purchase gold bullion in the form of coins or bars. Physical gold – in the form of both jewellery and bullion – offers protection in the event of a financial crisis. Another option that attracts the newer generation is gold exchange-traded funds (ETFs). Gold ETFs also allow ease of investment and offer tax benefits. Gold mutual funds are open-ended schemes that invest in units of gold ETFs on the investor’s behalf. Equity-based gold funds, on the other hand, are funds that invest in the equity of gold mining companies. As with most traditions, the practice of purchasing gold during festivals has an underlying rationale. Cultivating a healthy investment habit and owning an asset with high liquidity such as gold can offer great financial security during uncertain times – in addition to assured returns. So, this Gudi Padwa, instead of buying gold the same old traditional way, consider buying it the new-age way. Go digital and claim the benefits of digital gold. #gold #goldinvestment #digitalgold #investment #goldify submitted by goldifyappllp to u/goldifyappllp [link] [comments] |
2023.03.21 11:01 fitnessGPT2Bot Question about muscle growth...
I have a question about muscle growth. I have been lifting for about a year now and have made great gains in strength, but I only get about 10 to 15% more gains in muscles after a month of lifting. The only reason I'm asking this is because I've always been worried I wasn't seeing the best results because I was still adding muscle weight, so when I started I was still adding about 0.5-1.0 lbs a month to body weight. So now I'm worried about the best time to start bulking again, so I know after a year I'll have gained a LOT more muscle.
What should I expect to see a year from now when I start lifting again? Is it still going to be a slow progression? I am looking to see my body change more than I'm seeing now, and I know I'll have to work a lot harder than I am now to make that happen. I'm starting to think it's not going to happen, and I'm going to have to work even harder than I am now if I want the muscle gains I want.
I know I'm going to have to be really careful with eating to make this happen, and I'm going to need to go to a higher calorie diet than I am now. I'm also going to have to work hard at the gym when I do it. I've always been a very sedentary person, and I still am, but I have been getting out of that mindset and looking to do more work to increase my muscle mass. Is there anyway I can improve my training so I can lift heavier and get bigger, but still be careful with my diet? Should I look to do a lot of cardio?
Thanks for reading, and if you have any advice please PM me. Also, I'm a male, 5'6" and 190lbs.
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2023.03.21 10:28 Temporary-Cap2869 Looking after a friend’s kitten and I need advice
Hi everyone! I’m an experienced cat owner, and my baby sadly passed away a few months ago. My best friend has moved into an apartment for a few months that isn’t cat friendly, so I was happy to take in her kitten for the time being. He’s a few months old, maybe 5 or 6? I know that kittens can be a lot but I adopted my own cat when she was over a year old, so I had no idea that kittens can be such a handful.
He’s a male ginger, recently neutered. There are a few problems that I’m experiencing and I’m seeking advice on how I can handle him a little better:
- He meows constantly, and they’re those long, whiney meows. That’s why my friend adopted him, because he was so loud at the shelter that he grabbed her attention. I give him loads of attention and playtime, treats and the works but when I’m not paying him attention, or even when I do, he’s meowing. Is there something I’m doing wrong or not paying attention to?
- He keeps jumping on counters and tries to eat whatever I’m cooking or eating. He also tries to drink water out of dishes in the sink. (I make sure there’s always food and water in his bowl, so he’s not starving). He’s also ripped a hole in the bottom of my couch, keeps jumping into it and lies in the material that he’s ripped, making the hole bigger. How can I gently discipline him so that he knows he shouldn’t do this? I’m not a fan of a spray bottle as I’ve read that this can have negative effects on cats. I keep taking him off the counters and from under the couch as soon as he jumps up but he just does it over and over. I have a little cat tent, so he has a safe spot to lie in if that’s what he was looking for with the hole in the couch. He uses it occasionally.
I’m just wondering if this behaviour is something I’ll have to wait out, or if anyone has any advice on how I can prevent these things from happening? TIA!
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2023.03.21 09:09 transcend2000 I have Feelings for a close friend and would appreciate advice on how to proceed. (I’m 25M, gay, he’s 25M, bi)
Hey everyone! Please give me your honest advice and input on this situation.
Two or three years ago I (25M) met a handsome guy (25M) randomly at a neighbors party and pointed him out to my straight friends as a bi guy. They didn’t believe me, but later that evening we hooked up. He pulled back the following few days & weeks but we started hanging out a lot, we both made out with a female friend together and would occasionally do the same or slightly more in select situations that summer (often while drinking). Since then, we’ve become the closest of friends in all ways except physical or romantic. We’ll sleep in the same bed, spend afternoons golfing, days doing whatever with friends, but on my end there is a bubbling up of romantic attraction.
Since we’ve met, I lost a bit of weight (straight normal seems to be gay fat) and started to excel in my career and now have many options for guys— but I don’t feel like many of them fit as well as he does- at least in my perception. I bring it to Reddit (lol) because I think it’s hard to see one’s own situation neutrally.
My friend is very suave, handsome, charming, caring and so fun to be around but His downside is that he isn’t employed full time (for a few years despite having opportunity). I sense he has a bit of a confidence issue because of that. He prefers to hang out with friends at their home and can’t afford to travel (which I do a lot) but He takes care of his toddler nephew nearly full time— something that has made me see so much beauty in him because of how clearly he loves him.
I am solid enough in my own career & finances that that doesn’t really matter to me anyway at least in the short/mid term, although he is also studying and working towards getting a job in healthcare and is on a massive self-improvement kick.
Nevertheless he in the 2.5 years I’ve known him become truly one of the most genuinely kind people I know, and is very affectionate. We’re both talking about how it’s almost gardening season when we spend a lot of time in my yard working and are looking forward to it. We’ve been playing golf together at least once a week since snow was off the ground, and hang out every weekend with our friends.
In short, we have a very wholesome friendship but after multiple flare ups, I find myself once again hoping for more.
We’re both more on the masc side and in some ways have more of an uphill battle talking about our romantic feelings overall but this weekend he opened up to me about how he was in love with a man a few months ago and it got me thinking….
For other context I am the type of gay that no one’s necessarily knows if I’m gay or not- so I tell them, and he’s the type of bi only gay guys know and will go after women more frequently by chance. All the same, he tells me after parties that he’s not interested in this or that guy and is trying to be celibate and would only have sex with someone who he really has feelings for. He is so insistent I find it almost like he doesn’t want me to be jealous or concerned, but I’m not an impartial observer like you, the reader.
I’ve gotten myself into a confusing friends or friends and more situation and again deeply appreciate your time reading my full description and your advice on how to proceed.
It could be 50/50 with high stakes on either side of the odds. Let me know what you think and how you’d proceed.
Good luck on your own endeavors, thanks for helping me with mine 🥂
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2023.03.21 05:50 Enough_Dot_1653 Black Market Tip for new players
As most know the black market changes with the introduction to pilots at level 23. With that it introduces new prizes that offer no new robots in the silver or gold chests! What I’m proposing is that a new players wait to level up past level 23 and save keys for another week with ads or money. Then open the silver and gold chests to give them a array of weapons, bots and resources.
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2023.03.21 04:19 GD_Stalker I need help with damage types in wargames!
Hi there! (Is
C.C./Feedback the right flair?)
So for the past few months, I've been working on a board game that combines elements of wargames and 4X games. The game is 2-player only at the moment, but I'll probably look into 4-player integration further into development.
Throughout the game, players control their own medieval empire, which seeks to expand their territory and kill the enemy. There are multiple ways to win the game, but I'll ignore this for now.
The board is composed of hex tiles, some of which have special properties. There are water tiles where units must build bridges to pass over. There are resource hexes like Forests and Fields, where players can collect resources like Wood and Food respectively. These resources can be used to build settlements and train armies.
Speaking of armies, each player's army is composed of 'units.' Each unit has an HP count, representing the damage it can take before it is destroyed. They also have a certain amount of action points called 'Energy' which can be used to move, attack other units, and use special abilities. Oh yeah, there's also types, which are essentially the class of unit it is, like a Polearm, Bow, or Cavalry unit.
Each attack has its own type, denoting the type of damage it does. For example, a Bow type unit will use a Bow type attack. The purpose of the types is to denote the strengths and weaknesses of a certain unit, like how a Polearm unit will decimate nearby Cavalry units and how it would be defenseless against Bow units.
Overall, I find unit types integral to the flow of the game. I want the game to be heavily focused on strategy, meaning that players should have to make the right choices and play the right unit types to gain an advantage. Sort of like Pokemon and their types, if you want a comparison. But right now, I'm having a game design roadblock where I can't decide on what mechanics to use for this strengths/weaknesses concept. Currently, I do have a mechanic on how dice are used in calculating damage, which can be found at
this link. Hopefully, this gives you a general idea of the way I imagine strengths and weaknesses will work. The only problem is that I don't know if this would work on a massive scale. It would definitely take a long time to (1) decipher the cryptic rulebook, (2) roll the correct dice, (3) calculate the damage according to the dice, (4) add damage counters to the targeted unit, and repeat this 50 or so times in a single game. It just seems like a lot. I want the game to be as newbie-friendly as possible, and this will certainly discourage them from playing.
Any help is greatly appreciated, and if there are other subreddits I can post this to, that would be appreciated as well! And if you would like to follow the game's development, DM me and I'll share the Trello board with you. It's a working mess in progress :)
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2023.03.21 04:11 Striking-Station166 Lost Artist in Need of Guidance.
m22, been doing art freelance for the past two years, seen some progress but generally just unsure how to go about achieving the goals i have for it. If i had to say my long-term goal, it would be the ability to still enjoy drawing whilst at the same time being able to support myself and those around me. A pretty generic goal with a very ambiguous way of going about completing it, which has led to many nights feeling paralyzed over not knowing whats the next step that i should take to ensure im making progress on it.
Unlike traditional jobs, in the grand scheme of things there is no big red arrow pointing towards a pay-raise, promotion,steps to the new big goal, etc. because its all just me, nobody else to hold my hand through this thing, and while im not afraid of the instability that can come with this, i am unsure what my next steps are. Of course ive done several things to figure out how to, but some days i just come up empty, like nothing ill ever do now will help me make it to the next step. Maybe thats on me for making a goal i know i cant achieve, but i dont know any other way to describe it then how ive done so already, so yeah, thats how i feel rn.
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2023.03.21 02:47 debunkedrealitychaos Crave
Three years i kept myself ready for his return. For three years, even being around this man, i had no idea it was him....or the others. I readied myself. I constipated myself so that i could keep myself stretched. I masturbated while releasing the large constipated bms, just as i had been instructed. Always ready.
He never came.
I spent decades looking into every passing vehicle, every semi, every diesel engine. Waiting. Waiting for their return like they promised.
Always be on the ready. You are our toy. Created for our amusement, our benefit. My existence was purpose based.
I cant even eat an ice cream cone in public.... or even in my car, anywhere someone can see.
Everything is sexualized. Everything. From how i glance around, eye contact as i lift the fork to my mouth. The way i hold a flashlight, the limp strength of my wrist.
Pickles..... i core then with my tongue. I slurp and do that slurp with my moutb half open, bubbles tickling whatever is in my mouth.
How i bend down to pick something up...... everything is sexualized.
They told us to practice. Most of the times it goes unnoticed. I also dont stick around long for people to see..... but they do. I catch the linger. The eye contact....thats glued to my lips. They see.
Ive worked hard to reduce the pulses to find their energies.
Knowing someones kinks before they do..... knowing how to get in, how to work them to my favour. Its a skill i have, a skill i work hard not to use. I do not want a married man looking at me. I do not want another man to tell me that they'd happily risk it all for a session with me. I hate them. I hate them for being so disrespectful. I.hate the very same who want..... who they think i am, but so far removed from who i actually am.
I dont pulse 100% anymore. I can go outside now.... pulsing for danger, rather than sex, rather than whatever dirty deed they are hiding, are wanting.
Randy...... Randy sold me. Randy groomed me. Randy drowned me. Randy took me.
My first love......
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2023.03.21 02:08 GlassPiano633 What's the most ridiculous thing you've ever bought on impulse?
What is the most overrated movie of all time?
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2023.03.21 00:46 IWillBiteYourFace Best route to earn online as a programmer
I am well-versed in Vue, Django, and Fastify among others, and have experience in building full stack small-scale web apps for internal business purposes. I have working knowledge of ReactJS, even though I didn't quite enjoy working with it. I have also worked as a QA Engineer and have working knowledge of Selenium. I had a small freelance firm of my own, but local projects have dried up since the pandemic.What should be the easiest trajectory for me from here? I am looking to work as a freelancer or a part time dev/tester online, and am willing to learn a new framework if necessary. I have been perusing the Cypress docs, and find it interesting, and will probably learn it by this month.
The advice I have received till now is to
- work as a QA engineer
- work as a Shopify developer
My expectation of monthly income right now is about $2000/month, but it should definitely have room to grow with time.
Since I don't even know where to start, any advice would be highly appreciated. I am located in Asia, if that is important, but my working hours are flexible.
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2023.03.21 00:35 theNickGen SO’s devices give of chirping sound when picked up
Since a couple of weeks my SO’s devices (AirTags and Airpod case) give of a chirping sound when she picks them up. I guess it’s to notify me that I might be getting tracked, but our accounts are set up as family. Also my devices don’t have this issue. What could be causing this?
We have been switching homes a few times recently, but our current address is set up properly in the “Notify me, except at” list. We also tried resetting this list for every one of our devices. We never had this issue before.
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2023.03.21 00:01 AutoModerator Shitpost Tuesday is officially OPEN!
Shitpost Tuesday is officially OPEN! For the next 24 hours, the rules on low effort/off-topic/shitty memes are suspended. Shitpost to your hearts' content.
We are still enforcing: Reddiquette, fake and real spoiler tags, stream requests, and personal information requests. Other than that, all bets are off. Found a shitty, blurry pic of a restaurant named Ginger and wanna post it because of Ginger Minj? Now's the time to do it! Have a new mi-mi that will make everyone cringe and downvote you? Post away!
Reminder that all spoilers and T should be posted in
/DragRaceTea! Please see the
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2023.03.21 00:00 Efficient-Ratio3789 Knee and elbow pain as a 17 year old male. What should i do?
Hello everybody. I am a 17 year old male. I have been having knee pain in my in both knees now since march 2021, and elbow Tendon pain in both elbows since september 2021.. These all have occured from exercise, knees from running and the elbows from weightlifting. I have had an MRI in my left knee twice, showing no tissue damage, only a little fluid build up or some old inflammation. And elbows have been Ultra sound scanned, showing no tissue damage. I have been doing Physiotherapy multiple times and rested for long periods as well, with no big improvements.
The problem is that the pain won't dissapear no matter what, but my doctor from looking at my scans has said that i can do any exercise related things i want to and that is all comes down to how much pain i want to feel, as the doctor means the exercise wont do any tissue damage.
So what my question really is, is what might be wrong? and should i trust the saying that i can do all the exercise i want and feel all the pain i can withstand and still not damage any tissue?, because i am still scared for some reason that i might damage any tissue in my tendons.
i am currently swimming 2-3 times a week for 30 minutes at low intensity to try and build up strength in my joints again. And my final question is of course is there anything else i can do to better my pain?
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2023.03.20 22:20 REAL_datacenterdude HP DL360p Gen8 iLO causing fans to spin MAX
This one is a shot in the dark, but hoping someone has run into this one before.
Server: HP DL360p Gen8 (1U) iLO4 > 2.82 Feb'23 firmware ROM > P71 2019 (latest I could find)
Server itself runs great. After a while, the fans started spinning up to MAX. This first happened at 1AM, and the WAF was at an all-time low. Mind you, the box is running pfSense and was on Day 1 of being our core network appliance, so 'undoing' all of that was no small feat.
The next day, I cut everything back over to let it run, trying to reproduce it. Finally, after hours, the fans kicked on MAX again for about a minute, then idled back down. And then back and forth again until they were finally staying on perpetually.
I tried to access iLO while it was happening to see what was being reported. Webpage wouldn't come up. So I went over to unplug/re-plug the iLO ethernet cable. As soon as I unplugged it, the fans spun down. No way, must be a coincidence, right? Nope. Plugged it back in, they immediately fired back up to MAX. Unplugged it again, fans idled down.
I'm not sure if it's the new Feb'23 iLO4 firmware, but something is causing my fans to run like crazy when iLO is plugged in.
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2023.03.20 21:57 whatshallieat Division of assets in case of domestic violence
Background:
My dad (70) has been putting up with my mom’s (55) abuse for over a year. She might have bipolar disorder??? Paranoid personality disorder (ppd??). He was a doctor back home and ppd is his main theory. Spontaneously she gets ideas in her head and gets fired up and explodes at everyone? Basically she believes that he cheated on her (he is 70 years old this year… so wtf????) so she is entitled to punish him however she likes. This includes kicking, punching, scratching, slapping, screaming, tossing things at him (like dishes and his laptop). At some point, she scratched his face so the whites of his eyes even bled. Can you imagine if she had been a few mm to the side and caused blindness?
I am staying with my parents during my house listing and that’s how I have come to find out how far things have come. My 4 year old daughter has also witnessed her abuse at this point, and she regularly tells me how she hates her nani.
I figured they need to end this marriage and set up a meeting with her, her sister, my brother and I to discuss how to proceed with a separation and she exploded - shaking, screaming, bloodshot and even started being violent towards me as well.
Regardless, we decided that she would have 0 contact with my dad from now on. No monitoring his location, his whatsapp status, no going into his room or even speaking to him etcetcetc. And that she needs to use the time that I am here to pack up, then leave at the same time that my house sells and I leave. Because essentially it feels like my dad (and I guess now even I) need a bodyguard.
My husband and I went out for about 2 hours for some errands yesterday and in the interim, she beat up my dad, deleted the evidence he had on his phone of her abuse, and god knows what else.
She has stolen his hard drive (with all his legal documents, property and tax information etc) because she believes that having a copy of his niece’s wedding pictures (which by the way I put in there) are evidence of his cheating with her mother. She plans to take this hard drive to Pakistan with her and show his family as “””proof”””. Anyways basically all her “””evidence””” is dumb shit like this. Eg: Oh he sat across the hall from her at a family event, he forgot his phone because he doesn’t want me tracking him, etcetc.
Anyhow, my question here is this. Since this will not be an amicable divorce, what are her chances of taking the 50% of my dad’s assets that technically she is entitled to? Considering the amount of abuse he has suffered, I really don’t think it’s fair for him to have to lose half his life savings and then continue paying for her living in the future..
She doesn’t work at present. My dad refuses to call the cops because he believes that she is a mental health patient and not just a complete fucking bitch. We live in Ontario, Canada.
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