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2011.03.29 02:40 hesdoingwhat Apartments for rent, trade or sublet in Chicago.
2013.12.19 20:59 chicagohousing Chicago Apartments: Listings, Rooms for Rent, Roommates + Sublets
chicagoapartments is a resource for anyone looking for Chicago apartments, rooms for rent in Chicago, roommates in Chicago, sublets in Chicago and advice about moving in the Chicagoland area.
2023.03.26 08:50 D_M_L Lenovo tablet not turning on and vibrating non-stop
I have a TAB 10 Tablet (TB-X103F) (za1u0003us). It's a few years old now but it worked fine yesterday and today when I went to use it the screen stayed off and it kept vibrating.
I have spent hours today trying to fix it to no avail. I've tried all combinations of button presses, took it apart and disconnected the battery and all that, and even tried Lenovo's Rescue and Smart Assistant software. It seemed like my computer wasn't detecting it which is why the RSA couldn't work?
I can get it to stop vibrating (when unplugged) if I hold the power button for a few seconds and it cuts off a vibration and I quickly let go. But if I press anything or plug it in the vibration starts again. Screen has been blank the whole time.
I am currently trying to drain the battery empty and it's been vibrating at me for about 3 hours now. Die already!
I've tried doing a lot of searching and it seems like other people have had the same issue but I never saw anyone resolve it. I found one person that had sent it in for repair and they said there was an issue with the motherboard (and it would cost a lot to repair).
Has anyone had a similar issue and was it fixable or should I accept that my tablet is actually dead? Unfortunately I'm very low income and cannot afford to replace it so that really sucks if it's a goner.
If dead, is there a way to destroy the hard drive before recycling since I never got to factory reset it and my info is still on it?
submitted by D_M_L
to Lenovo [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:42 --serotonin-- What is it like to live in Detroit?
Hi! I’m moving to Detroit for grad school this summer. I wanted to gather some outside perspectives on what it’s like to live in Detroit aside from the school that’s convincing me to move there, and the couple people I know who have moved out of the city 20+ years ago. I have lived in the northeast, so I’m at least not afraid of snow. Been living in North Florida for four years. I will be getting a car soon and am hoping to live in Midtown instead of in the suburbs. I like hiking, books, and video games. I’m not into partying or sports… I’m white and 21F if that matters. What do you do for fun/ to meet people? Will I be safe in the city as long as I practice regular street smarts?
A lot of the apartments I’ve been looking at just to get an idea of housing don’t seem to have A/C. Many don’t seem to have fridges or microwaves either. Is this normal? I’ve been looking at 1/1 apartments in the 800-900 range.
submitted by --serotonin--
to Detroit [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:41 i_like__turtles I (29F) want to be there for my boyfriend (25M) of 2 years who struggles with mental health but I worry that it will become too much [TW: suicide]
First and foremost, let me preempt this with the fact that I struggle with my own demons too. My immediate family has a history of depression and I myself have ADHD that has caused much pain and hardship throughout my life. I have recently began to get a grip on it and my life has been improving little by little. My partner and I are massively supportive to each other and it's safe to say that our lives have become better because of our relationship. At the moment we are doing long distance as we are finishing our degrees in different countries.
We are 2 years into the relationship, so not long, but we feel very compatible for each other (similar core values, good balance of personalities, good communication and good conflict resolving) friends and family members think we are a good match too.
My worries come from the fact that he has occasional suicidal ideation, has made failed attempts previously, and will sometimes say things to me that allude to him believing that his life is not worth living. I have supported him in a couple of similar incidences by just listening and being there for him, and I don't involve my emotions or try to reason with him when he is in this sort of state. It's really not easy listening to someone talk about in detail how they might kill themselves but I try my best to keep a mental distance from it. His bad days/moments don't last long but are very intense and scary when it happens.
Sadly, I have friends who have committed suicide before and the fact that he could be next really troubles me. Is it selfish of me to think how I'm supposed to have a future with someone who doesn't see a future in which they exist? Or that they will continue living their lives but in agony and pessimism? And how will they cope when we face difficulties in the future?
Of course, he should be seeing someone professionally. Unfortunately, due to a shit healthcare system where he is at the moment where he's literally been to ~10 different appointments that led to nowhere or extortionate $$$, so he is currently temporarily self-diagnosed and self-medicated on adderall as he thinks it's what he needs (he has suspected depression, ADHD, anxiety - we know these three are closely interlinked and really does require professional help, but there are no options right now).
He doesn't have many good friends to chat to and he's not ready to tell his family about his struggles, so besides his therapist who he doesn't see that often, I feel like I'm his only source of support. It's extra hard when we are physically so far apart. I have sent his uni mate a message to ask him to check up on him/ask him to hang to take his mind off things, but other than that there's not much else I can do from here. I'm not sure whether I should tell his family. They have quite a "secular" view on mental health (aka they don't struggle with it so don't understand), but maybe if I tell them their son isn't doing so well, maybe they might take it a bit more seriously?
It goes without saying but I really love this person and want to support him as much as I possibly can. That being said, however, I worry about this being an issue in the future and don't want to compromise my own health over this. I work on myself every single day from the moment I wake up in order to function smoothly and I feel overwhelmed thinking about needing to be a rock for someone else who walks in between the boundaries of life and death, potentially for a long time.
Any support or advice or experience sharing is greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading.
submitted by i_like__turtles
to askwomenadvice [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:40 Thrillhouse1000 Adding to offset VS 'high' interest VS index funds.
At a cross-roads and needs some advice! I have recently purchased a 3 bed apartment in the inner burbs of Melbourne for around 800K after this I got a small amount of inheritance and have $25k which I put in my offset. This is nice as it reduces my monthly repayment, but with rising interest rates I'm also getting more from my high interest savings acct with Ubank. With my extra income over my expenses and repayments, should I be putting it into my offset, adding to my savings account (with 'high' interest) or adding to my modest portfolio ($12k) of index funds which could payoff bigger post recession?
what would Aus finance do?
*Note will be selling wristbands WWAFD?
submitted by Thrillhouse1000
to AusFinance [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:40 NerdRiver I (22F) feel frustrated by my (28M) partners communication. 1year together.
We’ve established I stay at his place on weekends he doesn’t work (I’m not allowed to have overnight guests where I rent). And that’s good enough for me. It sucks but life goes on. My biggest complaint and pet peeve with him is communication. He’s a hard worker, he games, has online friends he plays with. He’s trustworthy I sense no cheating. All I ask is for like a five minute continuous conversation through text, a phone call once a week because I’ll miss him and I don’t want to not hear his voice until the weekend.
At the end of every weekend on the drive to my place I give a window of opportunity for us to talk about the relationship if there is anything he wants to talk about or work on.
Last weekend i mentioned my upset about the lack of communication. And how I would like a phone call. He agrees to it.
Haven’t had that phone call and he worked this weekend so there’s no seeing him.
Im at my wits end. It has been a year. Multiple times throughout this year I’ve told him my being bothered with the lack of communication.
I don’t want to give ultimatums but I don’t want to give up all together.
I know for a fact he’s on his phone a lot. Scrolling through Reddit looking on Instagram talking to his friends more than me. He has time to do these things, where is his time for me? Solely on the weekends?
I don’t know. I’ve debated on breaking up with him over this same exact issue. Multiple times. I can get better and do better.
Do I end it now and just say fuck it to the year I’ve lost or do I once more talk to him about this and see if it works itself out?
I feel like a brat thinking about breaking up with him because of this. All I want from him is his attention his unwarranted attention I’m just about crying right now I feel so idiotic.
submitted by NerdRiver
to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:39 vivekaaron Vcat compensation
Hi guys, I receive a hearing from VCAT against the landlord. Please advise me on how much I could claim for each issue. I did research that I can claim up to 40,000 for each issue under Section 452, 472(1)(f). Can I claim 40,000 for each issue, please? I have all the proof and evidence. My hearing is on 20/4/2023. Please advise me and suggestions from your past experiences as this is my first time going to VCAT. The issues are as follows:-
On 14/5/22 The second week of my moving, my Ensuite door was locked due to the bad quality of the door latches. I couldn’t go to my room for three days. I was locked up. I was not able to shower, wasn’t have access to my bed to sleep, changed clothes, had access to my personal belongings, wore the same clothes for three days, had access to my television /electronic for entertainment purposes, and couldn’t go anywhere for three days. And most importantly, I had surgery one month prior to my lease and I was taking medication and painkillers. My medication was stuck inside the room and I wasn’t able to administer my medication. I suffered a lot of pain and couldn’t sleep. I struggled a lot during that time. I requested compensation from my real estate, but the real estate company is trying to avoid me and said have already requested a builders’ company but haven’t heard back. I feel like they are both trying to avoid me and refused this payment. Also, I asked my real estate manager again. She answered me with “ I don’t think they will compensate because this issue has been fixed”. This is the reason why I have come to VCAT.
They were no hot water access from 20/5/22 to 23/6/22. On 20/5/22 I find out that they were no hot water. I thought it might be because of my utility disconnection. So, I leave it like that and went overseas on 21/5/22 and back on 16/6/22. Hen I came home there ere still no hot water access. I contacted coliban water and they told me there is nothing wrong with the connection. On 19/6/22, I heard a big noise of water in my backyard. I found out that there was water leaking from the hot water system. There is a filter broken inside the hot water system. There is water leakage everywhere in my backyard and it was flooding. The leakage was drained with lots of water in my backyard and it was run for many hours until I realized. I off the main switch immediately. The builder came on 20/6/22 and he took some pictures and videos. He said will fix it asap. But it's been two days and I didn’t receive any updates from the builder. He added will send someone asap. Someone came finally on 23/6/22 at 5 pm. He found out that there is a filter broken inside the hot water system. He replace the new filter and he added it might be caused by the cold weather. There was no hot water access because of filter issues and it's not up to standard. The hot water system isn’t working, and I could not shower at home until it was fixed
On 20/7/22 when I returned from work and entered my house I heard a sound of water leakage. I discovered that it was leaking from the rooftop solar panels. The rooftop solar water was leaking all day I'm not sure how long this leakage has been on since I went to work and there is a lot of wastewater. I have proof and pictures/video of the incident. There was no hot water access since the leakage. Builder was informed about this incident. Builder came and check it and took some pictures. He off the main so that the water stops leaking. The tradesperson came the next morning at 8 am and fix it and let me access hot water for me but my solar panel hasn’t fix until now. Been told that they will fix it later as non-urgent repairs but it's been so many months and it's not been done. My rent included all the amenities including solar panels, I'm paying my full rent but not having access to solar facilities. The hot water system isn’t working, and I could not shower at home until it was fixed. I could not enjoy part of my home because there was a leak, it was unsafe, and tradespeople were working there.
On 18/8/2022 The garage door was not working. It’s stuck and making a big noise in the machine. I have already contacted my real estate they said will send the issues to the builder’s company. I contacted Barry Plant and they asked me to close the garage manually but using the red line from the garage operator. I was asked to close in and out manually by using the garage door up and down every time. But the builder’s company got back to me by saying this is not their problem, it’s from steel and garage doors from Melbourne. So they will only be able to come when they can. This is the 3rd month since my move in and there is another issue. It's already past few weeks but nobody got back to me. Megan from Steel garage door called me after two weeks saying someone would be coming on Friday, but nobody came or visited the place or fixed the issues. I called the real estate manager. They did not answer my calls or get back to me at all. Those just playing around and not taking any responsibility at all. Even though it’s not urgent, it’s part of my living. I paid for it. I pay for my rent, including the garage door as well So it’s not fair I’m paying full rent for 3 weeks but these issues have not been fixed until now. Because of this garage door issue, I was mentally disturbed. I was so insecure about my safety. Someone could be trespassing into my home, and getting into my car as my garage door has not been locked for 3 weeks. After 3 weeks, the builder came in the early morning and handover the remote key. I couldn’t park my car inside the garage due to a garage door issue. I just park in my driveway so that I can see my car all the time room my room window. I was worried about my car getting damaged from the hot weather, heavy rain, hail, and cold weather.
Compensation for quiet enjoyment disturbed. As there were a lot of issues occurred and a lot of tradespersons in and out for repairs, I would like to compensate for the quiet of disturbed compensation. By law, the rental provider has a duty to take all reasonable steps to ensure that you have quiet enjoyment of your home. I’m not able to fully enjoy my home because of repair issues, such as a roof leak, hot water filter leak, door latches, and garage door that stop me from using the room and house affected by the leak and these issues because tradespeople are working in my home
Compensation for Discrimination. Since I reported so many issues to my property manager, She treated me differently compared to before. She was annoyed and frustrated and treat me like I’m a troublemaker. The way she communicates with me treats me, came for inspection is totally different. Whenever I talk to her, she sounds rude and her tone is completely different. She has a lack of responsibility toward my lease as a property manager. She ignores me, does not answer my calls, and tried to decline my calls whenever I atto report something. She also asked me to contact the builders directly in case there’s a problem. I have proof of emails. When she came for an inspection, she asked about her profession and occupation. She said my employment salary is higher than hers. After there was a lot of issues came up, I feel like she expect me to fix the issues just because she knows my earning is higher due to my Occupational position. I also have proof that how she treat me and sent me an email regarding maintenance issues. Such as I will be able for the invoice from the builder can’t compensate me because it has been fixed. She knows about my personal details, employment, my salary, and my occupation. I feel like she judged me that I could afford to fix it at my own cost by looking at my employment and my salary. Being treated unfairly, and not as well as others, because of a personal characteristic that is protected by law, like employment, occupation, and profession. Treating someone differently because they speak with an accent can be against the law.
I’m paying my rent for my living every fortnight. It’s not fair I’m paying full rent including all the amenities, and there are lots of maintenance issues that arise every time. If there is a maintenance issue, why should I pay my rent then? All the maintenance issues must be fixed and sorted out before leasing to a tenant. But I’m paying the full rent and still facing a lot of maintenance issues. I did research about tenant rights, and I have to come and report to VCAT. Therefore, I would like to request compensation for my rights. I should be compensated for the waste of my money, time, amount of pressure, mental stress, damage caused me as a tenant.
submitted by vivekaaron
to melbourne [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:38 Liss_chocolate Random Urination… Please help!
I have two rag doll cats, one female, one male. They are full blood siblings, born one year apart in litters. Both are desexed/spayed.
The female is 6 turning 7. The male is 5 turning 6.
As of 8-9 days ago, the male has started urinating outside the litter box.
This has NEVER EVER happened ever before in his life.
First he urinated on our duvet cover. I immediately took it off and washed it etc… the next day once I put the duvet and cover back on the bed, he urinated on it again!
I then threw it out and replaced it. I have not let him in our bedroom since.
He urinated immediately outside the bedroom door 2 days later.
5 days ago I observed him go to the litter no less than ten times in a day. I couldn’t tell if he was going in there just to “mark” the litter tray (as I cleaned them out each time) or if it was just frequent urination due to something else. He wasn’t straining etc.
The next day I took him to the vet to check for a UTI/cystitis. They took a urine sample (excreted, not via syringe from the bladder) and they could not see any bacterial infection and no crystals in his urine from cystitis. He did meow in pain when they squeezed his bladder during the physical examination.
The vet put him under anaesthesia to take a urine sample directly from the bladder but he urinated before they got to that part of the process and were not able to take a sterile sample to send off to the pathology lab to do a urine culture.
He has now been home 4 days and the frequency of his urination has decreased, but today, he urinated on the floor about 50cm away from our bedroom door, again!
I have been using a cleaning product specific for pet urine so that it neutralises their urine and they don’t return to the same spot.
Can anyone shed any light on what is going on here?
There is no reason for this sudden behavioural change/anxiety/territorial behaviour etc.
I am going to take him back to the vet again for the urine to be drawn from his bladder and culture testing done in the lab (hopefully that goes smoothly this time).
submitted by Liss_chocolate
to Catbehavior [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:38 soiminreddit Don't be this guy's LMAO
2023.03.26 08:38 KSredneck69 Underground/Space Dwarves achievement bug?
2023.03.26 08:37 Okcommom383 Züs: The ultimate privacy cloud solution - securely store your data on the most private cloud network with encrypted-data-sharing and quality-of-service protocols. Mainnet launch - 31/03/2023(tentative).
The current decentralized storage solutions on the blockchain have a gap - there is nothing equivalent to AWS S3 storage. Data stored using IPFS and Filecoin are intended for cold storage and cannot be accessed frequently. Consequently, even decentralized apps use traditional centralized storage services such as Amazon Web Services (AWS), Google (GCP) and Microsoft (Azure) Cloud to store their data, despite issues with data breaches, security hacks, and having no control over their data. These gaps are met by Züs and it has a privacy feature that none of the storage solutions has - it allows encrypted sharing of data with proxy keys for the recipient on decentralized servers.
The Züs team has developed a blockchain that is fast, a storage protocol that incorporates quality of service to enable a high-performance network, and a configurable storage solution that enterprises can design for high performance and the best uptime. In fact, the performance is better than AWS S3, and it has better security, availability, and censorship resistance. Unlike traditional replication storage methods, Züs stores data off-chain by dividing it into fragments and distributing it across a network of decentralized servers, ensuring efficiency, security, and availability. Züs's potential quickly caught the attention of major companies, resulting in partnerships with industry leaders such as Huawei
, Ocean Protocol
, and Fetch.ai
Züs uses the utility token ZCN to buy and sell storage, which is currently an ERC token and will have its native token along with a bridge when it launches the mainnet. Züs has been in development since mid-2017. Initially called 0chain, the platform has been primarily focused on blockchain and storage technology, but recently transformed into a cloud platform with ecosystem apps that empower businesses and individuals with limitless capabilities. This update of 0Chain led to the adoption of the name Züs, which takes inspiration from Greek mythology's "God of the Sky" and serves as a metaphor for the platform's powerful cloud network.
Züs stands out from other blockchain storage projects in that it provides better privacy than traditional apps such as Apple and better performance and uptime than traditional cloud such as AWS S3.
Along with these, the Züs ecosystem is very versatile, consisting of six different dApps that will increase the usage of the Züs blockchain, offering a wide range of utilities for developers, enterprises, managed storage providers, and consumers, as well as artists for the NFT market. The 6 dApps in the Züs ecosystem are: Vult
Vult is a product that offers consumers a personal cloud similar to Dropbox or Google Drive but with unparalleled privacy and security features. Vult is offered on all platforms and can be accessed from phones, desktops, and browsers. Bolt
Bolt is a wallet application designed for ZCN tokens, featuring serverless split-key 2FA technology to safeguard your tokens as well as the ability to convert ETH to ZCN. It also allows you to stake tokens to our service providers and share in their income. Blimp
Blimp is an enterprise-grade, decentralized S3 storage solution that offers reliable backup, storage, and content delivery options for data, applications, and websites. With Blimp, users can configure their storage for the best uptime and maximum protection of their data. Chimney
Chimney makes it possible for anyone to earn income by renting out spare storage servers in a data centre. Chalk
Chalk is a studio app for NFTs that allows you to create a backstory for your NFT to market it effectively and store metadata in a permanent manner. Atlus
Atlus is the equivalent of "Etherscan" for Züs, providing users with a means to view their transactions, wallet, allocations, and check the amount of data stored and tokens locked on the network.
Züs (ZCN) is currently trading at $0.19 with a max supply of 400 million coins, with a current circulating supply of 160 million coins in the market. Since the launch, ZCN has reached its peak on April 20, 2021, with a price of $1.9.
With the upcoming launch of the mainnet, there is enormous potential for ZCN due to its utility and expected adoption by developers, enterprises, and the NFT market. Moreover, ZCN has been in development for almost 5 years and has withstood the bear markets with a strong team and continued growth with more products in the ecosystem. Social Media Website - https://zus.network/ White Papers - https://zus.network/whitepapers/ Apps
Buy ZCN Centralized Exchanges Gate.io - https://www.gate.io/trade/zcn_usdt Decentralized Exchanges 1inch - https://app.1inch.io/#/1/unified/swap/ETH/ZCN Uniswap - https://v2.info.uniswap.org/pai0xa6890ac41e3a99a427bef68398bf06119fb5e211 Bancor
- https://app.bancor.network/trade?from=0xEeeeeEeeeEeEeeEeEeEeeEEEeeeeEeeeeeeeEEeE&to=0xb9EF770B6A5e12E45983C5D80545258aA38F3B78 All Exchanges
- https://zcn.exchange/ Coinmarketcap - https://coinmarketcap.com/currencies/0chain/ Coingecko
submitted by Okcommom383
to WallStreetBetsCrypto [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:37 yooh-hooy chances of getting approved
I’m 19, just started working, income is going to be around 10k a year. I will start paying 200 in rent, no other utilities (living with aunt, she isn’t charging me for rent but I want to help out, in case that matters). Is it worth it to apply or will I just get rejected? Thinking of applying for a Chase card and the Amazon Prime rewards visa. I have no prior credit history.
submitted by yooh-hooy
to CreditCards [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:35 eternallytiredcatmom I got fired. I live in staff accommodations. 5000 kms away from home. I have nowhere to go.
Context: I live and work as a server & bartender in a resort town with +/- 30 inhabitants in the winter. I also have a bad coping mechanism for my ptsd, which is numbing myself by getting drunk. I'm working on it)
TW: Abuse, DV, SA, violence and home fire.
Got drunk after work on monday (ETA I'm a server and was closing alone, got drunk alone to numb ptsd flashbacks afterwards, sitting at the bar, before going home. I fell asleep there. Left before anyone came in but was caught on camera. I was off the clock and done with my duties but still in the work place eh)
Haven't touch a drink since then. I was feeling hopeful, no cravings whatsoever.
I just learned that I am fired (3 days later). I live in the company apartments. I have 24h to leave. I am 5000 km away from home.
Send me love and hope guys. I'm having a breakdown, but I won't drink.
UPDATE from tonight
I decided to not fight my employer's decision, but negotiated for a longer stay in my current apartment which is owned by the company I worked for. I still have to leave in two days, but it gave me some time to at least calm down and plan a little.
I've been feeling awful since I received the news that I lost my job and home, but it was a decision from head office and not direct management, so my coworkers have been incredibly supportive and helpful. The town where I reside is a very small, tight-knit community, there's only about 30 of us living here. Last night, my roommate invited our friends over for a sober boardgames night. It was simply amazing and I was shocked by how much people care for me and how upset they are about me having to leave. I had to talk people out of quitting in solidarity. I own my fuck up and they should not face unemployment because I do.
As I mentioned in my previous post, I am from Canada and live approximately 5000 kms away from home. I moved from the east coast (Montréal) to western Alberta a year ago. The only people I know here live in this tiny town, so I have nowhere to take refuge and regroup.
Losing my job is one thing, losing my home is just horrible. I have a long history of losing my home. I am 30 and this is the sixth time that I have HAD to move, instead of making the choice to.
- From birth to the age of 14, I lived in the same appartment. My dad and I had to move because our downstairs neighboor tried to break in and threatened to kill me every day during 2 years
- After we moved, my dad's drug addiction got worst, his suicidal ideations too. Not long after, my abusive uncle moved in with us. A few months after, I moved in with my older boyfriend because I was terrified and I was trying to keep myself mentally and physically safe
- 2 weeks before I turned 19, my older boyfriend, who was also abusive, kicked me out. I was estranged from my family so I ended up in the streets for almost a year
- Eventually, I managed to rent a place. It took time but I made it a home. Sadly, 2 years late, there was a home invasion at my apartment. A stranger forced his way in one night and held me captive for over 48 hours. He held me at gunpoint and raped me over the course of two days, then robbed me of most things I owned (even food and clothes) before leaving
- I obviously had to move out after. I found another apartment and managed to feel kinda safe and made it a home after a few years. It was my nest, my difficultly built safe place.
- After 8 years living there, I was woken up one night by a fire. I barely made it out alive. I lost everything I have ever possessed. EVERYTHING, except the clothes on my back and one of my two cats. I made it out alive, but I lost the safe living space I worked so hard to build.
- Last year, I moved all the way accross the country to try and rebuild myself. I found in this tiny town community, support, and the feeling of home. Now, I'm losing that again.
Having to leave is a terrible ptsd trigger but fortunately, my adrenaline kicked in and I'm sort of managing.
I started drinking hard 10 years ago to deal with the home invasion, and it finally caught up to me.
I found a place to stay at, with friends I lived and worked with last year. They're welcoming me with open arms. My struggle at the moment is to find a way there because they moved 10 hours away, in British Colombia, and I don't drive. The closest major city to me is 3 hours away.
Anyway, I still need love, support and encouragement.
Thanks for reading me 📷
submitted by eternallytiredcatmom
to Truthoffmychest [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:35 MoonlightBunBun18 How can I fix my (19F) relationship before going long time w my bf (20M)?
I (19F) have been together w my (20M) bf for about a year and a half. We met on a dating site and hit it off instantly. The thought of breaking up with him makes me sick because I feel like he’s my soulmate; he also feels the same way.
However recently I’ve seen a lot of red flags in our relationship. He doesn’t take me out on many dates cause he claims he won’t enjoy it as much as staying in. When I come over he spends a lot of time playing games and ignoring me (to be fair, he always like it when I play the games he does and I need to do a better job at joining him).
This past valentines when I came over, he didn’t get me anything while I did (I would even appreciate a handmade card just saying that he loves me).
My biggest issue though is his habit to get into lots of internet discourse over political or sensitive topics. I’ve had strangers message me things he’s saying to them when all I want is for him to stop and leave it alone.
We are also both in college, until a couple weeks ago he dropped all his classes after having a mental breakdown. I tried to tell him no but I didn’t want to make him more upset.
In his defense however, he loves me with all his heart, he wants to get married and have kids with me one day. He’s very big on communication so that we stay a healthy couple, but I’m so scared that I might say something wrong.
I am transferring to a new college next fall that’s about 3-4 hours away from where we live, I’m afraid of things falling apart over the 2 years we are apart. How can I make us stronger?
submitted by MoonlightBunBun18
to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:35 StrongInformation553 She just changed, man
Soooo it's true I've fucked up before, but we always found the way to work it out but now after 5 years she just found a way to grow apart from me... I tried to play it cool since I really valued what we had but every single time it felt like a push for me to get an extreme reaction.... Now I don't know why I did what I did... I don't know how I even thought about doing it... I just know i regret it but she might never be able to see that...
Maybe what people say it's true, maybe we've been through so much, maybe we're supposed to become undone a long time ago, maybe this was all just a mistake... Do you believe that boo?
submitted by StrongInformation553
to BreakUps [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:34 smallmamis678 I think I ruined an 11 year friendship forever
I'm writing in because I truly don't know if I'm in the wrong and if I should just give up trying to repair this friendship. I (23F) met my best friend, or I guess ex best friend, let's call her Jess (23F) when we were both in 5th grade. For 11 years, we were inseprable. Her family became my family. I had a rough childhood, so I was close to her mom and brothers. Her mom would call me her daughter, and her brothers would call me their sister. They became my support system, so much so that her mom offered to take me in many times. Jess also considered me a part of the family and referred to me as her sister. I guess the downfall started when we decided to move in together when we were 20. Jess had always ben a drinker since she was a teen, i however was not. I'd drink here or there, but not really a lot. However, most of the time she drank, she did it to black out. That wasn't a big problem for me, however, until she got into weed. To preference, i dont have anything against weed. One night, a friend came over to smoke and drink, and Jess got waisted and super high with said friend, I was there, and yes, I did drink, but only about 1 drink. Jess got so drunk and high that she couldn't form sentences or talk or even stand. That night, she woke up crying and started trying to choke herself out. Me and the friend that was over had to hold her down for about 2 hrs to keep her from hurting herself. Eventually, she did fall back asleep. The next day, she was hung over and remembered nothing. This scarred me, and I never wanted to see that again. Fastworward, a month later, it was my 21st bday. My sister decided to throw me a wine tasting party. Before the party, I reminded Jess that my family doesn't really party or drink a lot. No, I did not say specifically not to get black out drunk. I just assumed it was implied. No during the party i didnt activly stop her from drinking because she is a grown adult. Well you guessed it Jess got black out drunk and threw up everywhere, since she couldn't talk or really walk, me, and my sister had to carry her to the guest room and put her to sleep. The next morning, I called Jess's mom crying, telling her what had happened. Her mom apologized for what had happened, and Jess's grandma came and picked her up. I explained to Jess that I was angry and needed space, and she apologized. I also did tell her that if she got that drunk in front of me again, I couldn't be friends anymore. Soon after, Jess moved out of the place we shared and moved back in with her mom. Decpite this her and i still talked and texted every day. I thought we had gotten past that incident. However, one day, Jess just stopped responding to me. Her mom started to ignore me, and so did her brothers. Over night, I lost a mom, brothers, and a sister. I was completely heartbroken. especially since i never got an explanation. After weeks of nothing, i sent her one last text to tell her I'll always be here if she needed me, but I was done reaching out. Her ghosting me to the final text I sent was months apart. Those months, I kept reaching out, getting nothing back. At first, I thought something may have happened to her, but then I saw she was still posting on Instagram. Fast forward 2 years, and I miss my best friend. I texted her apologizing for any part I played in our fallout and if we could repair our friendship. Well reddit I was left on read. This was a week ago. Should I just give up and move on.
Edit to add These are just the main incidences I think are possibly why we're no longer friends. Other then these time Jess has always been supportive and an amazing friend. If she wasn't, I wouldn't miss her this much.
submitted by smallmamis678
to TwoHotTakes [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:34 Axcilicon anon is a loving and hardworking father
2023.03.26 08:34 really_sketch_vibes NFP and long distance holding me back from converting
I grew up Protestant, in practice fell away in college, got married, and since have experienced a reversion and an intense desire to become Catholic after learning about church history and becoming convinced of the real presence in the Eucharist. Also I’ve still never attended mass cause I’m scared of the whole thing. Catholicism is so much more intense than my Calvinist upbringing and the whole thing is just really intimidating. The rules! The unknown traditions! So wonderful but so much.
One of the biggest hurdles I’m facing is NFP. I totally understand the reasoning behind requiring it, it’s one of the first truths I really came to accept that made me believe Catholicism to be true. Birth control is so damaging to our society, and I’ve been hurt by it. But, in practice being open to life is really scary. My husband and I really want kids, but financially things aren’t great for us. We’ve just made a big move away from my family, I have little to no friends or much support here and to top it off I’m just starting my first real grown up job, with no benefits. I’d be able to take unpaid time off and keep my job, but that’s it. I’m still on my parents insurance, but my husband doesn’t even have health insurance as it’s so expensive for us. I would really like to buy a home before we have kids, that may be a couple years away at least. We so so want children though.
To top it off, my husband works away from home and can be gone for weeks to months at a time. I have a copper iud atm, and have been tracking my cycles with a tempdrop for the last 6 or so cycles. For instance my husband will be coming home for the first time in two months soon, and I will be in my fertile window. Abstaining while being open to life in those moments will be so hard for us. Sometimes he’ll only be home for a week before he’s gone again and having to abstain in those few moments we have together will be really bad for our marriage, or so I imagine. We already stopped any kind of phone sex, as I feel wrong about it now knowing what I know, which has been good but also hard when we are apart for so long.
Part of me thinks like we could mostly follow NFP, but withdraw when we are in a tight spot fertility and timing wise, but I also know that’s not exactly the right thing to do. My line of thinking is it’s better than what I’m doing now with my iud.
I know the Catholic Church and NFP could bring us many blessings, but wow the reality of it is just intimidating.
I don’t really know what I am expecting to get from posting this, but I don’t know a single Catholic in real life, or anyone who is practicing NFP. I feel like we are in a really unique situation but maybe some of you have some advice or kind words.
submitted by really_sketch_vibes
to CatholicWomen [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:34 latoye Guy gets to feel like a kid again instead of being seen as creepy
2023.03.26 08:34 eatitup_art My grandmother has made millions while her grandchildren live on the poverty line.
I'm F19 Growing up, I had a good childhood. Full of holidays and big family outings and dinners. Lived in a mansion. My granddad was the bread winner, and he was a very smart man. He provided all of these luxuries.
When I turned 14 my dad suddenly passed away. And later that same year, my granddad passed away. And the estate was left to my grandma.
A couple months after my grandad dying, my grandma served us with a lawyer's note that we were being evicted out of the mansion. We fought it for a while but were eventually hounded out. We moved into a small house that for a Few months, my grandma paid rent for.
The mansion has sat empty since we were kicked out. No one except for my grandma has lived in that house
I found out the other day from a Text message, that my grandma had sold my childhood home. And after questioning it in horror and surprise of it happening, was told that she plans to keep the money she's got from selling the place (minimum £2 MILLION) to live out whatever life she has left comfortably And that "Hopefully after she dies, i will still get something left to me from her estate,but she needs to be able to take care of herself in the meantime" . Her almost exact words.
This doesn't feel legal My whole childhood, I was told the inheritance would be the mansion being divided up between my grandparents children. Or, that the place would be renovated to apartments, and each grandchild would get an apartment.
My grandma won't let me see my grandads will. She just tells me he left everything for her to divide up and sort out. My grandad was a very smart wise man, it doesn't make sense that he wouldn't have a plan. He lived for his legacy. It was all he talked about, the legacy he wanted to leave and how amazed he was with his family.
I think she's kicked us out of the house, to have it empty long enough so that when she sells it, it wouldn't make sense for the money to go to anyone else but her, because she's the only one who's been living in that house. So she can keep all of the money, carry on living a lavish life and waste it while her family suffers on the poverty line.
I need any advice or help I can get. If I have any ground to maybe talk to a lawyer?
submitted by eatitup_art
to LegalAdviceUK [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:34 closetedpencil My husband (28M) and I (24F) got in a fight when my car broke down, leaving me sobbing on the side of the road and I don’t know why to do anymore
We’ve been together almost six years, and this man is honestly my world. But in 2019-2021 I had a huge mental breakdown. I was still going through unresolved trauma from my childhood when I got fired from my job, and I was mentally unable to get another one for a few years afterwards. (I did DoorDash from 2020-2022 part time though.) I internalized the pain I felt, and it tore me apart for years.
He has an undying resentment towards me for it, does not care that I was mentally broken, he feels I took financial advantage of him supporting me while I got the help I needed, like it was something I did maliciously. He constantly berated me and called me names because of his frustration with me. I don’t think he ever believed I was breaking down, he thinks I was being a lazy mooch.
It happened in stages. First, he told me if I didn’t have an income, he was done. I started doing DoorDash, he said that if I didn’t get therapy for my mood disorder, he was done. I did two intensive rounds, he said that I was wearing down my car and if I didn’t get a real job, he was done.
I’m still not 100% mentally well, but I’ve made great strides, and I was able to get full time job in a career I love. It still isn’t enough. He’s now asking me to “give him more,” because I’m not giving him enough. I don’t know what else to give, I feel like, in spite of my god awful mental health, I’ve given him everything I can. I understand he’s resentful about me not working, but he told me getting a full time job would resolve that resentment and it clearly hasn’t.
Tonight we got into an argument because my car has an overheating problem, no one can fix it, and I didn’t make it to the pharmacy for my medication. My car is the only ‘working’ vehicle right now, other than his motorcycle. He got downright cruel at the prospect of coming to get me, or offering to take me in the first place. He told me he wanted “me time” and that I never think of him and his needs. I told him I feel emotionally abandoned and that I didn’t want to fight and he said “okay bye” so the only choice was to fight or get the cold shoulder. Meanwhile my car is on the side of the road, I’m shaking and sobbing from a panic attack, and he just…. Didn’t care. He still doesn’t, he’s mad at me like I did something wrong.
He’s got downright cruel and sadistic about it, he told me he’s tired of me, that he only loves me sometimes, but wants to save our relationship. The more time that goes on, the more alone I feel.
I’m also uncertain about his own mental health. We’re under a lot of financial strain, and whenever things lighten up, he treats me better. We actually go back to having the good times we used to. But the rest of the time he’s so checked out. I can feel the strain having long term anxiety about our relationship ending has given me, and don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t have any friends I can go to because we moved cross country a year ago, and all my family is there too. So I’m truly alone. What do I do
TL;DR My car broke down and my husband was emotionally cruel and ignored me when I begged him to stop fighting with me, I was very clear communicating how the situation makes me feel. What do I do now?
submitted by closetedpencil
to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:33 eatitup_art My grandmother has made millions while her grandchildren live on the poverty line.
I'm F19 Growing up, I had a good childhood. Full of holidays and big family outings and dinners. Lived in a mansion. My granddad was the bread winner, and he was a very smart man. He provided all of these luxuries. When I turned 14 my dad suddenly passed away. And later that same year, my granddad passed away. And the estate was left to my grandma. A couple months after my grandad dying, my grandma served us with a lawyer's note that we were being evicted out of the mansion. We fought it for a while but were eventually hounded out. We moved into a small house that for a Few months, my grandma paid rent for. The mansion has sat empty since we were kicked out. No one except for my grandma has lived in that house. I found out the other day from a Text message, that my grandma had sold my childhood home. And after questioning it in horror and surprise of it happening, was told that she plans to keep the money she's got from selling the place (minimum £2 MILLION) to live out whatever life she has left comfortably And that "Hopefully after she dies, i will still get something left to me from her estate,but she needs to be able to take care of herself in the meantime" . Her almost exact words.
This doesn't feel legal My whole childhood, I was told the inheritance would be the mansion being divided up between my grandparents children. Or, that the place would be renovated to apartments, and each grandchild would get an apartment. My grandma won't let me see my grandads will. She just tells me he left everything for her to divide up and sort out. My grandad was a very smart wise man, it doesn't make sense that he wouldn't have a plan. He lived for his legacy. It was all he talked about, the legacy he wanted to leave and how amazed he was with his family. I think she's kicked us out of the house, to have it empty long enough so that when she sells it, it wouldn't make sense for the money to go to anyone else but her, because she's the only one who's been living in that house. So she can keep all of the money, carry on living a lavish life and waste it while her family suffers on the poverty line.
I need any advice or help I can get. If I have any ground to maybe talk to a lawyer? Sue her?
submitted by eatitup_art
to Advice [link] [comments]
2023.03.26 08:32 KdoubleG I (27M) am thinking of moving my girlfriend (25F) back in with her kid
My girlfriend and I have been together almost 2 years, and about 3 months ago I asked her to move out. She moved out and now I'm thinking of moving her back in. We moved in together after about 5 months into our relationship and we had been talking for over a year before we got together.
She has a kid with a dead beat and I felt her situation as she was living with her parents as I had been there once before. I also have a kid that I share custody with his mother. I helped her with her custody situation and helped raise her kid since he was young around 6 months. I also helped her get the kid to sleep on his own and helped transition from breast milk to formula after he turned 1.
Here's what caused our issues: we have had issues in the beginning mainly from her bringing in baggage from previous relationships, her being insecure thinking that I'm unloyal. However I have not once done anything that is remotely considered cheating. It took a while but eventually we were able to work that out and build trust. She has a thyroid issue and she began taking hormones to help. She became very erratic and started fighting with me constantly and threatening to move out. At one point she broke her hand punching the bed post because I didn't ask her if she wanted a salad after I made one for myself. I dealt with it because I knew it wasn't her it was the hormones and once she was off them things went back to normal. She never admitted to anyone what happened which bothered me and she was upset because I didn't go to the hospital with her because I didn't want to support her behavior. I was worried of getting her pregnant and I mentioned to her early on into our relationship that I wanted to get a vasectomy and she was very against it, she told me she would break up with me if I did it. About a year into our relationship I made the appointment and I was going to try and hide it from her but I felt that was wrong and I told her a week before I went for the surgery. She despised me for it and said I was hiding it from her but I felt as if I didn't because I told her about it. I gave her the whole "my body my choice" and she didn't like that very much because she is pro life and thought of it as a joke. I froze my seman so if I ever wanted to I could have kids again. So I don't see why she was upset with me. Our relationship continued to get rockier from there I was the best man for a wedding and I planned a bachelor party. She wasn't happy about it because she assumed there would be strippers, there weren't we didn't do anything outlandish it was more like a guys night out for 3 days. The entire time I kept in contact with her. However I did change my location on Snapchat to show I was only at one bar because I didn't want her to fight with me while I was having a good time with my friends. She eventually found out by snooping through my phone and found the app with the bars location still in the search bar. She assumed I lied, understandably but I didn't do anything that would be considered wrong I didn't cheat or anything else. Our trust was now gone and I happen to see on her Fitbit a message from a guy she used to talk to. This guy was just a "friend" however I'd seen their messages before and he was saying things like he was going to be her next baby daddy and was really trying to get with her. As soon as I caught her I lost trust in her. At this point we were looking through each other phones. Then the what finally broke the camel's back we had just had a conversation about being better to each other and end this poor behavior of going through each others phones and having trust with each other, she went to visit her parents and she stopped messaging me randomly and messaged me at 3am saying her phone died I looked at her location on Snapchat and saw she was at a bar. I decided that was enough and told her I was done. After a week she moved back home with her parents which is 4 hours away.
Now that's all the bad stuff heres the good: I have grown really attached to her son and he calls me daddy, I have put in a lot of effort to make sure this kid is loved because I grew up without a dad and I do everything I can to be there for my own kid. Although we lost trust with one another I can say she is probably the only girl that I have ever dated that I know wouldn't cheat on me. She has also been very willing in the bedroom as she grew up very religious and has been willing to try new things and be adventurous with me. She does sappy things on holidays which I like because I do them too. She likes the same things I like and has the same interest which is hard to find. I enjoy smoking weed from time to time and she is willing to start and stop with me anytime. She has helped me out financially when things we're rough during the pandemic by working while I was looking for a job. Out of all the girls I've dated she is by far the least craziest. I think that after this experience and this time apart that maybe we can build something together. I realize many of my faults and realize that I was putting my own self esteem issues on her and I've talked with her about it and she has realized it too. Her situation right now living with her parents with no job or place to call her own has been hell for her so I think that she has come to appreciate what she had with me. We had an amicable separation and we ended up getting back together shortly after because we both still love each other. It's also very hard for me because I have a connection with her kid and I don't want to feel like I abandoned him. Should I go through with this and move her back in?
TLDR: My GF and I have been together for 2 years. We fought about dumb things that eventually caused us to separate and her move out. She has a kid that I have a connection with and I don't want to feel like I abandon him. We realized our mistakes talked it through for 3 months and I feel like we should try it again. Should I go through with it?
submitted by KdoubleG
to relationships [link] [comments]