Tiny town broken bow
Spring Day 81: Sweetness Remembered
2023.06.10 06:57 rdk67 Spring Day 81: Sweetness Remembered
(This is a nonviolent text.)
Life! Exclamation point! Today’s speaker is made of clock parts and possesses encyclopedic knowledge about the nature of natural life. Life! Exclamation point! Though biographies in the back of conference programs won’t ever tell the whole story, they tempt us with the true face of authority. Today’s speaker – Life! – is made of clock parts, probably a grandfather clock to begin with, young for its age, but then he started slapping on extra clock parts, moved by an urge he couldn’t explain, until the function of tolling the hour was more of a hobby, a weekend pass-time, compare to what all those precision instruments were up to on a regular basis. As a vision on stage, the speaker’s machinations were there for all to see – the whirring of gears and belts, the clanking of chains. Where his heart chakra was thought to manifest, swung a pendulum.
The nature of natural life is not an easy expertise to build a vocation around – Life! Exclamation point! – but what a sentence to say aloud. At this point in the address, one of the speaker’s mainsprings uncoils where his belly button would normally be. He uses the longer of his hands to poke it back into place without breaking stride, continues: What is a natural life? More to the point, what is a natural lifespan? Who better to know than me! He points to himself when he says this, does a quick spin in place, revealing the dozens of differently styled clock faces that cover the surface of his body, continues: I’m after the author’s natural lifespan, like to pretend I’m playing along, but the whole time, I’m thinking about his natural lifespan. Hmm, hmm, I wonder why? Ha! // The author changes the subject – today’s speaker thinks of something else.
When you discover someone living an unnatural lifespan, you seek to find out why. Not that the reason is the point – not by a longshot – but call me curious. Maybe they tripped at the right moment and tumbled past the grave. Maybe they did a few extra calisthenics before the cock crowed. Or – perish the thought – they succumbed to an unholy pact at a vulnerable moment. I have taken it upon myself to sniff them out – and when he says this, the regulators above his eyes both arch significantly. And what then? We usually have a quiet chat before I recite my speech and complete my visit. It isn’t personal, I begin – time sometimes wells up, spills over its banks, and floods the village. If we could avoid such catastrophe, we should – don’t you agree? The time nature intends, through natural lifespans, would never, let’s be honest, flood a valley.
And what, then, would I do? Proprietary information! hoots today’s speaker from the stage, does another quick spin, stage lights flickering off his crystals, his gleaming metals. About the author’s natural lifespan – oh, you thought I’d forgotten! Were you 18 when you first died? Had it happened before then? Were you but a child under-supervised? Under-supervision-ed, we might say. Remember the day? You rode a toy out into the street, and a car’s front bumper rushed forward to kiss you on the left side of your head, the temple, a stone flung by the age of automobiles. Don’t you remember? Of course you do – the passionate screeching of tires, as those around you stopped and turned to look, surprise gradually replaced by horror at what they knew happened but couldn’t bear to see. You thought you survived – didn’t you? – but thereafter, what appeared on your left temple? A knotted cist so prominent, people stopped you and asked what happened. You saw exactly two physicians over the next 10 years, both telling you not to worry about it, and so you didn’t. You didn’t! When you probed the spot with your fingers, it felt like a rounded room, a shelter built by something trying to survive. As for that 18-year-old involved in that off-road motor vehicle accident – nominee number two, let’s call it – true, you were far more aware of mortality by then, but your own? You climbed aboard a 3-wheeled vehicle that could travel at more than 50mph, completely lacking a seatbelt, headrest, or protective frame – without a helmet, boots, or jacket – and the brakes were less than half there that fateful day, a means of slowing down – a vehicle that would be rendered illegal to operate within a matter of years of the accident . . . the accident . . . remember the accident? August, you were traveling off-road to do farm work, the cornfield you were riding beside with several rows chopped out for silage, and on impulse, you decided to turn into the field to see where it went, then really opened her up because of the green blur of all that corn. Did you secretly expect the drainage ditch? Was this more of a suicide mission? Over the side you went, face first into the opposite bank, and if anyone was wondering – the effect was not of pain but of the lights going out all at once. Imagine the nature of reality that allows for: the inevitability of the crash, followed by all the lights going out – this is really happening – followed by some utterly absent experience, like a film editor cutting in a blankness where reality normally insists scenes of existence should be. The film projectionist would have been instructed to fast-forward through this part of the film, such that no time seems to pass, and the next thing we know, he is trying to push a 3-wheeler out of a drainage ditch. That thing weighing more than he does, and he’s trying to heave it above his head, up and out of the drainage ditch. What had he become? What time-wise tricks were in play? He finally gave up trying to free torment from its channel, staggered through the field toward the truck, face covered in blood, never went to the hospital. When the story is recounted later by his dad, the story became how dad fixed the 3-wheeler by prying the front wheel out of the frame with his truck and a chain. Can you imagine that chain now? They called it a log chain, and the links were cast iron. It was completely covered in rust.
The author knows all this already, receives a spiritual visitation during the writing of the phrase suicide mission, wondering if he’s okay. Yes, he replies, knowing this particular metaphysical weather report has a lot of ground to cover. Today’s guest speaker picks at one of his stems in a distracted way, lets the matter rest, inquires about whether – uh-hum! – he might be permitted to carry on. The author gets up, refills his coffee, returns to one of the picnic tables arrayed in front of the derelict peace church where he lives. He is surrounded by millions of individual affirmations of life, many of which are visibly in bloom or going to seed. A bumble bee flies by. A yellowish bug with zigzags on either side ambles up, its antennae twice as long as its body, tapping at the world in front of it. Among the local insect population, it’s regarded as a savant.
Uh-hum! How many more brushes with death would the author experience before it finally took? There was the time a few years later, same farm but different brother, taking turns firing a handgun at a target. This would be the last time he would fire a gun for any reason, was it not? They climb into the brother’s wedge-shaped sports car, named after the grasping part of a bird of prey, and into fate’s hands did fly. The car was totaled, the two of them, without seatbelts or airbags, unhurt inside the crumpled remnants of the crash, mere inches from winding up once more inside drainage infrastructure, this one built by municipal authority, and therefore of a substance that would have been altogether worse on an unsuspecting traveler headed straight down. Yes, you might have been saved from becoming the remains of the day – but by what?
The child who caused the crash, the one who pulled out in front of that bird of prey, barely old enough to drive, who had two younger passengers inside with him, taking them out for ice cream maybe – that young driver sat nearby while police sorted out the story. He was crying on the side of the road like he would never stop, like he had identified the crash as the latest in a series of personal failings that would stretch into the future of his adulthood like a hot blacktop road and which, at every stop along the way, tragic suffering would be the font of consolation. Was this the way reality was supposed to work? The author recognized the boy as himself at an earlier age, bent down beside him, put a hand on his shoulder, and said, you will be okay. No one was hurt, and the rest can be replaced – your heart is true, and your soul will find its relief.
Ah, yes, the crash, says the author – ah, yes, the crash. Ah, yes, the crash, says the author – ah, yes, the crash. Ah, yes, the crash, says the author – ah, yes, the crash. The late days of spring may be the most forgotten of the year. If we aren’t anticipating summer – it’s still spring? – then we’re longing for those moments when the world was still opening its mouth, and then its eyes, and then its hands. The trees are all open by now, those late-arriving sycamores even filling out their leaves, such that the twigs and branches are all mildly bowed by the extra weight. After spring assumes its labor, the rest of the season finds its dedication, and I imagine the beads of water rising through capillaries beneath the wood – call it a space program – and a sweetness spreads throughout the tubular organisms we call trees. Late spring – sweetness remembered.
Life! Exclamation point! Chronobiology knows nature has much to say about what is cyclical, when, and for how long – much less to say about the natural length of one’s existence. Is death something one develops a knack for? The next notable death in the author’s life occurred a few years later – the death that would make dying into a full-time vocation. And where again do we find the author? Beside a drain. This one introducing the age of indoor plumbing, as the author lay on the floor of a friend’s bathroom, his life flashing before his eyes, as he vomits into a toilet. This time the world does not go dark all at once but feels like fuses blowing out, like a timed demolition, flashing like a string of firecrackers across the structural frame of a building, and a voice not his own telling the author: you’ll be okay, ride it out, remain present, you’ll be okay.
Would he though? For this fourth death, another blank spot appeared, no two – two instances of nothingness, orbiting each other, during which time, during which time, during which time – perhaps language hasn’t the proper security clearance to convey the negotiations that must have taken place to bring about a return to the living. The author remembers his friend opening the bathroom door, before which she would have been knocking and calling his name. When the door struck him in the back, and he came back to life, had he landed in the place where that drain did lead? While his friend cleaned up the bathroom floor with a towel, he sat on a bed with his hands covering his face. The hideousness he’d just passed through was the abbreviated version of what was to come – he knew the drill by now. The knot on his forehead was gone.
Destiny had finally shown him to his home, gave him a tour of the place, before scraping him off the floor, then setting up a series of baffling crises – from autumn 2002 to May 2003 – that would occupy the author’s attention for decades to come. The will toward dying had finally brought the world to life, and the mind of the universe was both ecstatic and enraged about it. Down there, at the bottom of the drain, they were fighting a global war on terror, war on terror, war on terror, and if wars on terror sum up preferred formulations of self-annihilation – symbol of invocation: fighting a reflection – then perhaps the author’s presence was meant to form a mirror-in-mirror infinity from which sustainable futures would emerge. Welcome to Mirror World! Where reflectivity gives us an evolutionary future! Where a universal narrative unfolds!
The author is making me write this, I must confess, but to everyone’s surprise, I am forcing the author to make me! The author is mine! And the author wrote that, too, I must additionally confess, and the two of us go around and around like this – symbol of invocation: two snails having sex in midair. The flatness and hardness we associate with reflectivity is something we will all outgrow eventually, and the hologram of hyper-reality will appear within our being like a flying saucer, and we will all be both abductees and witnesses, shown around the universe in style. Too much to ask? The last such alien contact – the insinuation of verbal and mathematical language into the genome of big-brained primates – gave us the keys to earthly reality. We are now exiting the stone age, evolving the means to make benevolence a fixture of human life.
The author made me write that, too, and even though I am just as surely making him write this, we must admit the mutability within the fabric of reality was not won without a struggle. The author faced death 11 times that year, faced death the next year, and the year after that. Each point along the way wanted to finish what the others couldn’t, and soon death felt like an echo, and in that moment of not really distinguishing the source and the reflection – when they both look somewhat the same – he could tell life and death were likewise difficult to discern. Life! Exclamation point! Are you merely an extension of entropy? A quicker way of dissipating the heat from a rocky-bodied planetoid like the earth? And if you are, then is life really just another form of death? But death! Didn’t you show us the way? Wasn’t dying the source of the cure?
Today’s speaker made me write that, just as I made him think it. And as thoughts passed from gear to gear around his body – as cuckoos sprang forth through tiny doors at various angles – as a series of chimes and tones issued forth from the stage like the ringing of a bell, if the bell could tell time and was tolled by committee – then the river of the natural lifespan, subject of such grand speculation in a previous incarnation, could now take its course. Perhaps indeed valleys would flood, but such is the natural origin of certain fertile fields. Springtime couldn’t agree with me more, its will toward abundance glad to splay its fingers before another epic growing season. As the author considers ways to wind up this report – knowing such lived truth inspires concern – whether death equals life or life equals death, he reasserts a will toward world peace.
Peace.
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2023.06.10 06:50 ThrowRA658233 Is there something wrong with me? 24f just dumped
Hi all long time lurker first time poster. I really need advice right now. So i (24f) have really had an awful time in love lately. And I mean awful. I got broken up with back in October by my at the time boyfriend of almost a year and a half and I didn’t enter the dating field until early March. Well in March I dated a guy then he ghosted after a month. Then i didn’t date again until April and in April I met this amazing guy I mean he was everything I wanted/could ever want, sweet funny, made me laugh, made me feel safe he likes animals, literally everything I look for in a guy! In the time that we were together we spent almost every weekend together and it was amazing I mean I thoroughly enjoyed it. He did as well, I stayed over at his a couple of times and hung out with his friends and one of his family members and it was all going great! I didn’t bring up the boyfriend word or girlfriend word until we were going to be intimate, when I said that being intimate was a boyfriend privilege. To which he asked if I wanted to be his girlfriend and I said yes. Well last weekend we went out with my friends and his family member that I met and it all seemed like it was going great, we all had a good time and got back to his place at a decent hour and the following day we all hung out. The next day he and I were hanging out and had a little tiny disagreement, but worked it out and cuddled on the couch before going home. Well When he was talking me home he almost said the L word a couple of times when we were kissing goodnight, and everything seemed alright. I went inside to go to bed. The next day everything seemed normal again, the usual texting pattern, the same energy, making plans! I mean we were planning to maybe do the county fair, then on Wednesday he responded to my message from earlier in the day at 12 AM. Then my message from Thursday morning went unanswered. Then today I sent him a video of some shorts I was thinking of buying and he didn’t respond. Until about fifteen minutes ago sending me this long basically break up text. Saying “I wanted to reach out and let you know what's been on mind lately. I want to be completely honest with you because I do care about you. I feel awful doing this over text, but felt this was the best way for me to get my thoughts out as clearly as possible. I think that your an incredible woman and love our time together but as I’ve just got out of a long term relationship just before moving out here. I just think that I’m not comfortable or ready for that commitment again right now. I'd love to remain friends if you're open to it. I'm here if you have any questions or want to talk at any time” I never told him anything about a serious or long term thing, rather I wanted solely to spend time with him and enjoy our time together. I did make jokes about keeping spare pajamas at his but I continually made a point to say it was a joke. At this point it seems like there’s something about me. Like maybe there’s something wrong with me like why else would this keep happening? I understand not wanting to get into a serious thing, I mean my ex and I were looking at rings for goodness sake! I really do think there’s something wrong with me if this continuously happens, all I want is to give someone other than my dogs all this love and affection I have inside. I’m wondering if someone could’ve even said something that caused him to change his mind. I mean that’s the only thing I can think of other than something being wrong with me Can anyone offer any insight?
this isn't my first heartbreak but it hurts so much, I feel like he was just using me or something... My mom was saying she thinks he may have scared himself with the thought of he and I being together. And I'm also so confused about him saying that he wasn't ready, because if he wasn't ready why the heck would he pursue me in the first place? why would he call me "my love" if he didn't want anything serious? I mean if he'd been thinking about this why even pretend to entertain the idea of making plans?!
TLDR: I 24 F was dumped over text by 23 M out of the blue, I feel like he used me and dumped me and that somehow I did something wrong
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2023.06.10 06:37 Imaginary-Zebra-3589 New Aniara fan fiction short story - The Lost Voices of Aniara: A Space Saga
Introduction The short story you are about to read was created/inspired/based on a variety of sources related to or about Aniara. Aniara rock opera (Seventh Wonder) - The Great Escape, the Aniara wikipedia page, the Aniara film, poem etc. So if you read something and it sounds familiar, it's probably because it comes from or is based on, one of those sources. I have also tried to incorporate some of the thoughts and ideas expressed here on
aniara, so some of you may see that reflected. I have not read everything that has to do with the Aniara universe, but I have found many of the resources listed on
aniara very helpful in creating this short story. Thank you for those. I have also included a couple alternate endings.
Also, this story belongs to everyone, so everyone should feel free to to fill in the blanks, add to, subtract, or change any part of the story, in anyway they see fit.
I dedicate this short story to all the fans of Aniara, this story is for you and of course the late Harry Martinson.
Like many people who watched the film 'Aniara', I was mesmerized/traumatized by it. It really had a profound effect on me. So much so that I decided to write this fan fiction short story. I am not a writer. The short story that you are about to read is my (very) amateurish tribute to the film. I apologize in advance for all of the grammaspelling and other errors. Despite the (many) flaws of this short work, I hope that you can see what I was attempting to do. Anyway without further or do, I present to you:
The Lost Voices of Aniara: A Space Saga WE CROWN THE SKIES WITH OUR TIARA, THE LIFE AND FATE OF ANIARA
Note: The following represents the most complete (so far) chronicle of events that happened onboard the Aniara.
Year 18 - Song of Melancholy - My name is Benjamin Jenkins, but everyone calls me "Benny", I am proud to announce that I am the new "Captain" of the mighty space "cruise ship" Aniara. Of course, my title could just as easily be the Admiral of Mars or the Conquer of the Universe, or some other ridiculous sounding grandiose title. Sometimes you must laugh in the face of despair otherwise you will go insane. It's all just for fun of course. I was given the title "Captain" by the crew because I was able to restore the communications transmitter. At least I think I was able to retore it? The lights show green for transmitting, so yeah I bet it works, and besides, all of this is being recorded for posterity and it will be placed in a time/memorial capsule. After that the capsule will be sent in the (general) direction of Mars/Home, where hopefully someone finds it. I'm also the Senior Maintenance Tech in charge of repairing/prolonging various ship systems, etc. There are now only a few remaining livable areas of the ship so it's not as much work as one might imagine. And to think 18 years ago, I was just an ordinary passenger, how far through the ranks I've come! As the "Captain" I will now recount the entire history of the Aniara, the various events, the everyday happenings, from the awe inspiring and amazing, to the boring and mundane, great triumphs and crushing defeats, all the feelings of happiness and joy that come with new life and all of the sorrows and despair that come from (too) many deaths and (too) many hardships. All of our great accomplishments, setbacks and everything in between will be laid bare before the entire universe to witness. Our love, our hate, our dreams, our wants and desires, disappointments, anger and fear but above all our HOPE. Our precious HOPE, the only thing we have left, which has kept us alive for so long. Our HOPE that this message will be received, that someone, somewhere will know our story and our struggle, our HOPE that Mars will be successfully terraformed into the paradise that we all know it can be and our HOPE that Earth will be restored to the paradise that it once was. It's all here, it's all being recorded for the future. I will start our saga from the very beginning of our trip all those years ago...
Hour 1 - Routine Voyage - Well, this is it! Soon I and many others will make a new home on Mars... of course if we hadn't ruined the first one...
Week 3 - Without a Map/A Slight Detour - Today the Captain made an announcement that there would be a slight detour in our trip. In order to avoid a collision with space debris, (which would have destroyed the ship) we had to veer off course. Some of the debris hit the nuclear reactor (a very rare event), which forced the crew to eject all of the ship's fuel. The Captain told everyone that we will be able to resume our trip to Mars once the ship passes a celestial body, which should (probably) happen in about two years. Everyone is (understandably) disgruntled by this unfortunate news. As for me I have no one waiting for me on Mars so it's not as bad.
Year 2 - Wait and See - After several long months of trying out all of the various amusements and other distractions, I was starting to get bored, so I spoke with one of the senior crew members and asked if I could volunteer to do something, anything. Also a job would help keep my mind off our current situation.
Today, my request to work was approved and now I'm part of the crew. My job is to do general maintenance tasks around the ship. I also help take care of the algae, which are used to supply the ship with oxygen and food. It's not a very challenging task, in fact I find it very tedious, but the algae are crucial for the ship's survival, so it gives me a sense of purpose and on top of that I also earn extra points.
Eventually, because of my (part time) job in maintenance, I would come to know every nook and cranny of the Aniara. On one particular day I noticed a slight problem (Electrostatic Diffusion Impaction or EDI) with the ship's air filtration mechanism. I was quick to inform my supervisor about the issue and together we fixed it immediately. If I hadn't spotted the problem, it could have gotten much worse and that would have been catastrophic for the crew and passengers. Afterwards my supervisor bought me a shot of (rationed) Dutch brandy. Other than that, nothing of note has really happened. Everyone is basically in a holding pattern.
One last thing. I've heard a disturbing rumor that there is no celestial body for us to turn around at... If this is true then, that would mean... But for now all we can do now is wait and see...
Year 3 - The Yurg/The Passing of Mima - A memorial was set up to honor the end of Mima. So much joy had she given us. On the wall among the thousands of drawings, pictures, and sad goodbye letters was a poem that went like this:
We sit and stare at all the marvels that she brings us.
Mima lead the way.
Shine your light!
Be the beacon of hope at night.
Perfect grace in the barren house of space.
Shine your light!
Blind us when reality bites.
We so need the magic she does.
Many rumors are going around about what happened to Mima. People say that the Mimarobe (MR) was the one that ended up causing Mima to die. As for me, personally, I don't believe it. The Mimarobe just didn't seem like the type. A few times after I got off from work, when I walked to the end of the long line of people waiting to see Mima, the Mimarobe would come out and say "Ok, everyone that's it that's enough for today, you have to leave now, sorry." My own personal opinion is that she was just trying to give Mima a break, so even though I was of course disappointed, I completely understood. Sometimes we all just need a break. Sometimes things just get to you and you start to feel overwhelmed. I understood the feeling. Mima was like us in that way. Anyway, Rightly or wrongly the Mimarobe was locked up in the ships brig, her and another woman, I think she was one of the pilots,
Isabella\, I think was her name but I might be wrong. Oh well, our lives must go on, much sadder of course, but that's life, I guess. ****Isagel, the pilots name was Isagel, her and the Mimarobe would later become a couple.
Year 4 - The Cults - Strange things have started happening. Various cults have sprung up all over the ship with bizarre and strange names. One of these (that I am a member of) is called the ゴールデンサンライト・フォーエバー・クラブ - Gōrudensanraito Fōeba Kurabu - which roughly means the Golden Sunlight Forever Club. Some of these phony cults are/were created as a disguise to have outrageous sex orgies. The cult that I am part of is one of these. (HELL YEAH!). The other cults are very boring, stare out the window and worship the stars or something like that, types. (Glad I'm not a member of those!).
Year 5 - The Calculation - A few weeks ago I met someone special (Carmen) at one of the "worship" services. I've seen her before a few times, but this is the first time that we "connected" and it was amazing. I'm glad that she accepts my physical imperfections (burns scars). Now we are a couple and have left the cult.
Fantastic news! The Captain has announced that an Emergency Refuel Rescue Probe is on its way! The news of the rescue probe has had an electrifying effect on the crew and passengers. Everyone is so excited that no one even cares that we will have to wait just over a year for it to get to us. People are starting to clean and pick up trash again, and the sex clubs and other cults are starting to go away (in anticipation of a return to proper civilization). Now we have hope again! Thank GOD!
Year 6 - The Spear - The rescue probe is almost here. (Only one week away!) I also have even more great news! My
girlfriend fiancée is pregnant!, now I will be a Father just like I always wanted! I have spoken to Captain Chefone and he has agreed that he will marry us on the day that the Aniara turns around and heads (finally) back to Mars/our new HOME! Even though it will take us several more years to get back, it will have been worth it to me. I am grateful for the "slight detour" we had to endure, because it allowed me to meet the love of my life! Now with our precious child on the way, I am truly happy. PURE JOY - beyond all words...
Something is wrong... After an entire year of training and preparation, the crew has successfully grappled the refuel probe and brought it on board. Everyone expected that within a few days, (a week at most) that we would turn around, but it's been three weeks and nothing. Every day the passengers ask the crew what's going on? When will we turn around? and every day we get the same answer: "Soon, everything is going according to plan, just be patient." People are starting to doubt and lose hope. I even walked right up to Captain Chefone but he knew what I was going to ask and he brushed me aside very angrily saying "Not now, I'm busy!". Now I don't know what to think. One minute I have a future and the next nothing. How can this be? I don't understand! WHY?
Catastrophe! After work I went straight to my quarters to sleep, it had been an exhausting day. Just after I fell asleep, I was awakened by a rumbling. Then, over the speaker came the announcement: Return immediately to your cabins and fasten your seat belts! Since I was already in bed, and had no idea what was going on, I quickly fastened my belt. When it was all over
[missing] passengers and crew left. I was told that it happened because of something called "bow shock", which
[missing] kind of like a shock wave. The bow shock had badly damaged many systems.
[missing] so now I've been "promoted" to Senior Maintenance Tech. Repairs must
[missing] don't have any more spare parts for
[missing] so many are dead...
Today the Mimarobe completed her beam-screen project. So now when you look outside you can see beautiful waterfalls and green fields etc. I try not to look at it too much. For me its just too painful...
Year 7 - The Fall of Heaven - Today marks the one year anniversary of the arrival of the so-called "Emergency Refuel Rescue Probe". What a very official and grand sounding name for a giant stupid looking dart or as some call it "The Spear". I've even heard some people refer to it as the "Devil's Javelin", but whatever you call it, it's of no use to us. The Astronomer had once told me before she died "supposedly" from a heart attack, (rumors say she was murdered by the captain, I don't doubt it) that all the work and tests they had done on the probe were useless and that even the hardest drills were simply ground into dust without even making so much as a scratch on the probe. Despite a literal barrage of tests and every possible experiment known, even using our most advanced lasers, they had achieved NOTHING! That was the moment I realized that we would never make it home. I even visted "The Spear" once, it was years after all the experiments had ended. There was a time when the area was heavily guarded by the crew and only authorized personnel were allowed in. Of course when I went to see it nobody was around, nobody cared, everyone had given up on it long ago. I saw all of the black marks from what must have been hundreds, if not thousands of desperate attempts to get inside it, or just to figure out what the damn thing was supposed to be. On the floor all around it were small heaps of black and silver metalic dust, remnants of our strongest and hardest drills, remnants of our hope. Our best and brightest couldn't even figure out what it was made of, let alone figure out how to use it to take us home.
I beat my hands against it over and over and I cried out my pain and anger at it. "You were supposed to save us!" "You were supposed to take us home!" You Damn! stupid thing, help us! save us!" But of course it was all useless my cries went unanswered, all I did was injure my hands and hurt my soul, assuming I even have one. After that I (I'm ashamed to admit it)... in complete and total desperation... I got down on my hands and knees in front of it and begged it to save us. "Oh, great magic spear, please save us and I will do anything, anything..."
After I had exhausted and humiliated myself I got up and went back to my quarters broken and alone. All hope was lost before my visit with "the spear" and afterwords it didn't even exist, not even as a word, as though there had never even been such a thing or concept as "hope".
I had been struck by the spear, just like everyone else, head on. My now ex-fiancée and I have split up. Things just weren't the same after the procedure. I don't blame her at all for our break-up, after talking about it, we agreed that if there was now no chance for us to make it home then... what was the point? I went with her when she had the procedure done. But before we went I secretly met with the doctor who would perform the operation and told her what I wanted done after. She told me that I was sick... that it was "disgusting", and what did I plan on doing with "it". I told her that it shouldn't matter, none of this matters, then I pulled out an EFR (emergency food ration). EFRs could remain edible for an indefinite period of time. (In theory they could last for hundreds of years.) Here I said, "one now and one when I get what I want". The doctor was stunned, I knew what she was going to say and I interrupted her and said,"Unlike everyone else I saved my emergency rations." "I only have the two left (I was lying) so don't try to extort me for more." After years of eating only algae, EFRs were (almost) more valuable than oxygen. Of course the doctor agreed and I got what I wanted. It might sound crazy but I had a plan. Fate had taken my family away, but I was prepared to defy even the gods themselves. I was determined that I would have my FAMILY! No matter what! Nothing and no one, no force of nature, no power in all the universe would take that from me. NO! NEVER!
I asked me a question, no reply.
I dreamt me a life and live a lie.
Dream me a nightmare...
I traveled the stars but passed them by.
For trapped on Aniara, here was I.
...always been leaving.
Year 8 - [missing]
Year 9 - The Daily Grind - I have now returned to reality. I have stopped all of the sick and sad mind games that I have being torturing myself with. I once created a "plan" to do the impossible, but no more, no more. Everyday now seems like an endless pointless, struggle. Sometimes
[missing] and hours. Some of my co-workers stopped
[missing] for now that's all any of us can do...
Year 10 - The Jubilee - Tonight at the Light-Year Hall, those of us that are still left are going to "celebrate" the 10th anniversary of our 3 week voyage to Mars or as I like to call it the "never ending space adventure" Ha!
Captain Chefone gave the Mimarobe a medal for her creation of the beam-screen device. I sat in the front row and couldn't help but notice that one of the Captains wrists was bandaged, probably from another suicide attempt...
Year 11 - Hope Restored - My ex-fiancée is dead. She commited suicide like so many others before. I was hard at work trying to revive the algae (they had been neglected for some time) when my assistant rushed in and told me the news. "They were about to send her body into space, you have to hurry if you want to see her". I immediately and literally dropped everything I was doing. The algae pack I had been working on fell and splashed on the floor as I ran out the door as fast as I could. As luck would have it, I made it just in time to see her, and I even had time to cut a lock of her hair. I then kissed her one last time and said "Goodbye my love... but, goodbye is not forever."
Then that was it, off she went into the empty, endless, void. She was gone I told myself, but not dead. I squeezed the lock of hair in my hand and vowed that I would bring her back to life, somehow, someway, I would make things right, we would live the life we were supposed to have. I would make it happen. It would happen. Suddenly, I felt a force deep inside me rushing to the surface. It had been years but I knew what it was, It had returned to me, a feeling of exuberation, of joy and the certainty of knowing that everything would be okay. I now resurrected my "plan" and now I had a reason to live again, I had a purpose, and now I had......HOPE! And this time I was determined that I would never lose hope again. NEVER!
Year 12 - Return of the Cults - Some of the old cults have started making a come back... However this time they are no longer sex/fun cults, because after so many years of eating just algae, almost everyone has lost their sex drive/ability to reproduce... I think because the type algae on board was genetically modified to produce the maximum amount of oxygen possible, so it was never intended to be used as a permanent main source of nutrition. If we had access to more than just the one type, things might be different...
Year 13 - Foward, Foward into the cold empty night! We ride! - Captain Chefone is dead. Suicide. I knew he had been on the brink the past few years so it's not much of a surprise. I would often hear him say to himself "We should have been home by now." Of course he was right, we should have, but instead here we are stuck on this eternal "voyage of the damned".
A week after Captain Chefone died, I found myself walking by his quarters. I had the sudden impulse to go inside. I don't know what it was (probably just morbid curiosity), but I think I just wanted to find some answers...
I was surprised to find that his quarters were just as much of a mess as mine. (And everyone else's.) I think because he was the Captain, I expected a lot more. (He was only human.) After looking around the room, I went over to his desk and inside I found the Aniara's Offical Ships Log, but the electronic notepad was damaged beyond repair (on purpose). However, underneath it was a small paper notebook. "Ah, I said out loud, now this should be interesting." When I opened the notebook I was immediately disappointed. Most of the pages were torn out and those few that remained had been harshly scribbled over.
On one of the few pages not missing or completely marked over was written this: Today, we almost lost the entire ship, were it not for my quick and decisive actions as Captain.
[illegible] an incredibly rare occurrence
[illegible] critically damaged our main nuclear reactor.
[illegible] only seconds
[illegible] forcing me to
[illegible] off course
[illegible] have power for some time. This evening I will break the news to the passengers in such a way that will cause the least amount of panic and at the same time not destroy their hope. If they knew the real situation, it would only cause unnecessary chaos. In this way, I will maintain order and keep the passengers safe. Fear and
[illegible] as Captain of Aniara
[illegible] that is now my primary job.
[illegible] now like a
Shepherd Father and the passengers my
sheep children. In many ways we are very lucky,
[illegible] this trip, Aniara's sister ship crashed into Jupiter heading towards the Orion belt colony. Everyone on onboard was killed.
On another page was written this: The rescue refuel probe is here.
[illegible] turned out to be
[illegible] not what I expected. I have
[illegible] for clarification,
[illegible] Mars
[illegible] -----cation. Testing will continue. I still remain confident that
[illegible] the project called "
[illegible] ---elin" can still be used in someway to turn the ship around and resume course.
The last two pages were so scribbled over that I could barely make out any words let alone a full sentence. I did however, notice what looked like the word "Devil" written over and over. Very strange. I left the Captain's quarters with more questions than answers...
Year 14 - [missing]
Year 15 - The Light Show Ends - Today the projection device created by MR, (Everyone still calls her the 'Mimarobe' as a sign of respect.) had to be shut down to conserve power. The Mimarobe often expressed to me her regret at not being more forceful with Captain Chefone in explaining the problem with Mima. She told me that if she could back in time she would say to the Captain:
"Just imagine what it will be like if Mima isn't here... do you understand how hellish the situation will become? My life is dedicated to this program and I'M TELLING YOU, IT WILL BURN OUT AND DIE! Imagine if people can temporarily go back to earth by turning on a light switch, now imagine if the bulb blows up, and there's no replacement..." "I know how important Mima is and you don't get it!"
The beam-screen seemed like a great idea at the time to keep everyone's spirits up, but in many ways it may have done more harm than good. People lost their minds staring all the time at something they knew they would never have...
Year 16 - [missing]
Year 17 - [missing]
Year 18 - The Time/Memorial Capsule - The Mimarobe was the one that came up with the idea for a time/memorial capsule. She (like all of us) has suffered greatly, but from time to time she would show a small spark of her old self. The idea, while slow to catch on, would eventually give those of us still left a renewed sense of purpose. (People now had a reason to get out of bed.) But, it was I who would take the idea and transform it into something greater. Our first attempt at creating the capsule was successful (it was little more than a metal box) but at the same time, as the Mimarobe pointed out it looked too much like a large coffin. I agreed. We could do better. We had to do better. But we had to be careful
[missing] effecting power systems. I asked the Mimarobe if she could sketch a better design. After two days the Mimarobe presented me with a new design, it was beautiful, but simple, yet elegant. Above the sketch was were the words, "Heart of Aniara." The name was perfect. We would fill the "Heart of Aniara", with our art and our poetry, with our hopes, dreams and wedding rings. We would pour into it our stories, our struggles, our trials and tribulations, we would fill it with the tear drops from our very souls.
The "Heart of Aniara" is almost complete. It has taken an entire
[missing] solid effort to build and everyone took turns polishing it, so now it shines like the golden sun. We also wrote
[missing] and painted two large red hearts on the sides. It
[missing] long and on the inside are different
[missing] created using metal partitions.
[missing] was instrumental in its consruction...
Year 19 - A Slight Delay - Disaster! Several Power systems, including all emergency back up systems across the ship have begun failing for some unknown reason.
[missing] working around the clock to figure out what is wrong... I don't know how much longer we can hold on...
We finally found the
[missing] will work for the time being, but
[missing] restored power
[missing] will do for now...
Year 20 - The Heart of Aniara - At last the time has come for our send off. Everything is ready. As the "Captain" of Aniara it is my great honor to commision this new vessel "Heart of Aniara". Behind me I heard someone whisper "vessel?". I continued, "It is my firm belief that the "Heart of Aniara" will make it back home to Mars and everyone will know our stories..."
A moment before send off, I told everyone to wait. Theres one more thing left. I then slid open a hatch on the side and told everyone that I hated to do this to them, but I was going to Mars with my family. The Mimarobe approached me with a half smile on her face and said in a very serious tone "Good Luck, Captain Benny", "tell everyone on Mars hi for us and that we wish we were there." I smiled and promised that I would. Then to my suprise all the others came up to me, with some shaking my hand and congratulating me, asking me to say hi to their family and friends as well. I then ducked down into the newly christened "Heart of Aniara." Then the hatch was sealed. A small rechargable electric candle that I brought with me, provided the only light. Knowing that we would be leaving in a moment I opened a small box, took Carmen (lock of ex-fiancée's hair) and Sarah Ann (small jar with dead fetus) and held them together in my left hand against my chest. I could feel my heart beating with a mixture of fear and excitement. I took out a small children's book with my right hand and began reading it from the beginning. It was my daughter's favorite. It was called "The Duck and the Noodle." "Daddy are we there yet?" I laughed as tears ran down my face and said "Yes, my little princess noodle were almost there."
The Memorial Capsule lauched into space with a loud whoosh...
(Mimarobe, MR) - When everyone had just got through waving goodbye and were getting ready to leave, the view screen turned on and with it a pre-recorded message from Captain Benny. "To celebrate this great day, I have arranged for you a "Grand Feast", then he paused. A few people exchanged questioning looks. Then the Captain spoke again. "You see", he said with a smile, "Unlike all of you, I saved my emergency rations. You will find them hidden inside the mattress in my quarters, enjoy!" "Also, you will find two bottles of wine, yes! real wine!" Before the video even finished several people had started shuffling as fast as the could to Captain Benny's quarters. The Captain wasn't lying, it appeared that he had indeed saved almost all of his emergency rations for some special occasion(s).
What a feast it was! To make it fair for everyone we took all of the rations and put them together to create a kind of giant stew. Each of us not only savored each precious spoonful, we cherished it as though it was a long lost loved one. It is not an exaggeration to say that each bite was chewed one hundred times or more and then held in the mouth for ten minutes or longer, swishing the pulpy liquid around and around. I even saw one person spit the food back into their bowl and then put it back into their mouth, over and over again. That seemed a little bit unusual to me, but everyone should enjoy their last real meal the way they want. As for the wine their was enough for everyone to have a shot glass filled to the brim. We talked about the "Great Feast" for months afterword...
Year 21 - [missing]
Year 22 - The Living Dead - (Mimarobe, MR) We've had to abandon almost the entire ship to conserve power, but basically were still
good alive... I still dream about Isagel and our son from time to time...
Year 23 - [missing]
Year 24 - The Sarcophagus - A few remaining survivors, including the Mimarobe, sit cross-legged in a dimly lit room. One of the few survivors speaks in a rhapsodic manner about the divine power of sunlight on Earth.
The Aniara slowly descends into final darkness...
Note: Years 25 through 5,981,406 are missing.
Year 5,981,407 - Lyra Constellation - The Aniara, derelict, frozen and devoid of human life - reaches the Lyra constellation and approaches a planet as verdant and welcoming as Earth was formerly. It quickly passes by continuing on into the endless void of space...
Date Unknown - The Warm Embrace - Ages come, Ages gone, Aniara soon embraced, engulfed by warmth and shine, newest born crimson light, Aniara far from home, aflame, not even ashes remain.
Epilogue: Year 100 - The Triumph of Hope - Despite the faliure of many valiant rescue attempts, including all attempts at communication, we remain confident that those onboard the Aniara knew that they were not forgotten. It is difficult to imagine (the speaker momentarily shuttered), the impossible challenges they endured. The story of their lives will remain in the collective hearts of humanity for all time. It is our hope that we will do right by them, now and in the future. We vow to never repeat the mistakes of the past... and that is why today, on the one hundredth anniversary since the Aniara was lost, we reach across time and space to bring their souls back home, home to this sacred place... We hereby consecrate this new park as the "Aniara Memorial Park and Museum Complex." As you walk through these doors, one of the first things you will notice is the "Heart of Aniara" on display. Along the walls are the names and pictures of the passengers and crew, their artwork, poetry, and most importantly, the stories of their lives, their hopes, dreams and wedding rings...
Aniara Memorial Plaque: We ourselves are the sorrow, we are also the joy, everything human is rooted in humanity, and no human being can escape humanity, not her hatred and her self-degradation, nor the joy she spreads, nor the love she forms.
Date [redacted] - Project "Devil's Javelin" - Status report #
[redacted] - As of today's date we are aware of a total of four "spear-like objects"
[redacted] and has contextualized that there are many more as yet discovered. Because of
[redacted] we now know they are made of
[redacted] and probably come from
[redacted] the first was found on Earth 86 years ago, at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean. The second one was discovered by the crew of the Aniara
[redacted] years ago. The third was found here on Mars, near
[redacted] and moved to its present secure location. The fourth and newest one was found when
[redacted] the far side of the Moon.
[redacted] buried inside the
[redacted] impact crater. We have yet to discover the purpose of these "spear-like objects."
After
[redacted] to prevent another type of incident.
[redacted] have been able to gain access to the inside of the one here on Mars.
[redacted] only after
[redacted] and the entire team.
[redacted] using the most advanced technology and research methods. Dr.
[redacted] found
[redacted] which is impossible and should not exist. However, we must now come to grips with the horror that this new revelation about humanity has
[redacted] general public must never find out...
THE END?
Alternate ending 1 Year 5,981,407 - The Sarcophagus World Destroyer - As the ship Aniara descended towards the lush and green planet, the crew rejoiced. Or at least they would have if they hadn't all been dead. After thousands of millennia wandering through space, they had found a planet that was almost identical to Earth.
The planet's gravity was very strong, and the ship had become trapped in the planet's gravitational pull and started hurtling towards the surface.
The Aniara crashed into the planet with a deafening roar, causing massive destruction and sending out shockwaves that rippled across the surface.
As the dust settled, it became clear that the landing had been catastrophic. Plant and animal life had been completely obliterated, and the once green planet was now a barren wasteland. Soon not a single living thing was left to witness the horror and the devastation that had been caused.
Another beautiful, thriving, planet, a blue and green jewel, once teeming with life has been turned into a lifeless barren wasteland...
Alternate ending 2 Year 5,981,407 - The Second Chance Sarcophagus - As the ship Aniara descended towards the lush and green planet, the crew rejoiced. Or at least they would have if they hadn't all been dead. After thousands of millennia wandering through space, they had found a planet that was almost identical to Earth.
The planet's gravity was very strong, and the ship had become trapped in the planet's gravitational pull and started hurtling towards the surface.
One one-trillionth of a second after the Aniara crashed into the planet the mysterious spear-like probe on board finally awakened. A God-Like Power. In that one one-trillionth of a second the Aniara was scanned by the powerful probe and the events and lives of the crew had become known to it. At the same time, both the ship and the planet were saved by a force field of immense power. The ship was now resting safely on the surface of the lush, green planet. The probe had determined that the primitive life forms on board were worthy of a second chance at life and it was able to resurrect the entire crew and all the passengers from microscopic DNA that had been left. The Aniara was perfectly restored and even the Mima had been brought back. The crew and passengers awoke to find themselves in a veritable Garden of Eden, a paradise. Maybe this time things would go better and the mistakes from the past would not be repeated...
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2023.06.10 06:34 Critical_Oil_6001 I was curious about a local legend. Now, what was supposed to be a week-long trip might turn into my eternal nightmare.
I just hope that people see this post, that they might start spreading the news before it’s too late. Something big is coming, something ancient, something older than any of us could have ever imagined. It might be too late. I don’t know what will become of me, of the people I love that I might never see again, by the time you are reading this. But I implore you to listen and take this story seriously, because it could save your life. Or not. I don’t know yet how deep this goes. If it’s true, if what I think is true…God help us. Nothing can save us now.
I’ll start at the beginning, because you need to understand how long this has been happening, and the implications of what is possible now that it’s getting worse. Over winter break, I went to visit my friend from high school, Jackson, in Vermont. He goes to Bennington College, studies Social Sciences with a minor in Linguistics. Smart guy. He used to write my papers for me in English class, and I would pay him back in six packs. That’s always how it was: him, studious and put together, and me itching to get outside. I was constantly on the move, biking through the forests behind my house, trail-running, building a treehouse for my little brothers, you name it. I wanted to get my hands dirty, get into nature. I guess that’s why I opted out of college, and went for camp counselor positions and summer gigs until I secured a conservation job with a park near home. Nature is important to me, and I want to do my part as the generation that has a responsibility to heal the world.
The outside was what called me to Bennington, aside from the fact that I missed my best buddy. I don’t remember when it was first brought to my attention, but I became aware of murmurings of Bennington’s rocky past online about a few months before I was set to visit Jackson. Being an experienced outdoorsman, I wasn’t afraid; on the contrary, I was rather excited to get out there and prove my worth to Jackson and his college buddies, who were far less athletic than I am. Looking back, I’m kicking myself for being so cocky. I can’t believe I ever thought of my best friend in that way.
From what I could see on the internet, Bennington College’s history was a long and often sinister one. There were videos about people vanishing into thin air: a girl wearing a red parka went for a hike alone and was never found, an experienced man leading an outdoor expedition disappeared in the woods, a woman fell into a stream, doubled back to the campsite to change her clothes, but never made it to the site, a man on a bus disappeared from the vehicle at a stop but left all of his luggage, a teenage boy was waiting in his mother’s truck and when she came back, he was mysteriously gone…I wish I could say these stories deterred me from poking my head somewhere where it didn’t belong.
Instead, I only grew more curious. What was going on in this so-called “Bennington Triangle?” I was in a unique position to investigate this phenomenon for myself. Many people hear about strange occurrences and the intrigue piques their interest, but they never have the chance to see it for themselves. But I could. I knew I could hold my own out in the wilderness—it was literally my job! Besides, I was a strong, slightly stubborn young man, built steadily, and I could protect myself well. What could possibly happen to me out in those woods, much less to a group of young college-aged men? The people who went missing most likely made one fatal mistake that cost them their lives, or maybe it was all just a big coincidence. Either way, I was about to find out for myself.
It was halfway through December when I left to meet up with Jackson. I got there on the last day of classes, and Jackson told me he would be busy until later in the day. I assumed he was cramming for a final, and I told him it was no big deal, I would meet up with him and maybe meet some of his buddies later. Besides, I had some plans of my own.
The most famous missing persons case in Bennington went cold, and is still unsolved to this day. The case is a tragic one, and I didn’t want to be insensitive by going around asking for information or throwing around names. Everything I needed, I found online. Paula Welden was the name of the girl in the red parka that went missing. Allegedly, she left campus one day to go on a hike by herself. She left the campus around 3pm and hitchhiked to an entrance to the Long Trail, a trail that runs for almost 300 miles from Massachusetts all the way to the Canadian Border. She wasn’t dressed to be outside for long, but as the story goes, she never made it back from the trail.
There was one sighting of her, however, that particularly interested me. A man reported that he had seen her running around, rather erratically, in the bottom of a gravel pit near the entrance to campus, and I wanted to see if there was anything left of the pit. Because I’m experienced with many different kinds of natural phenomena, I initially wondered if there wasn’t a natural explanation for her distressed behavior. I thought maybe there might be an insect nest or an infestation of small animals at the bottom of the pit that she might have disturbed, so I decided to check it out in my free time.
After the RA checked me in and I tossed my luggage into Jackson’s dorm, I packed a small backpack with essentials: water, sunscreen, energy bars, mini first aid kit, some rope, a utility tool, a flashlight, and a lightweight jacket. Then I headed out towards the pit.
The first thing I noticed was how much smaller the pit seemed. According to the eyewitness description of the incident, Paula was running up and down the side of a deep gravel pit, but what lay in front of me now was something much more shallow. I walked down into the center of what was left of the pit, but I could easily see over the edges. The small, dark fragments of rock crunched and ground together under my hiking boots, and the slowly sinking midday sun bounced off of the remnants of white snow around me. It was an unusually sunny day for winter, and the snow was, curiously, letting up for my visit. But the good luck for me ran out here—there seemed to be nothing to investigate at this location. My hopes of finding any evidence of insect or pest infestation that could have disturbed the girl were dashed, maybe buried several feet underground.
I lingered awhile, kicking at the bits of gravel in the small pit. I watched the small rocks scatter over the rest of the gravel, hitting up against the edge of the pit and rolling back down a few inches. I turned to go, but stopped. Maybe it was a trick of my eye, the sun reflecting harshly off of the snow and glinting in my sunglasses, causing me to not see clearly. I walked to the edge of the pit and kicked some more gravel at the side. The small rocks skipped across the uneven surface of the gravel pile, and scattered up the edge of the pit, farther than gravity should allow them to travel. I kicked more, and it happened again. My heart started beating faster.
I crouched down and picked up a small stone. I rolled it gently across the gravel, softly enough that it started to slow when it reached the incline of the side of the pit. I watched, astounded, as the rock slowly rolled uphill about a foot before coming to a stop. I gave a shout of excitement and jumped to my feet.
As I stood up straight I nearly fell back down. In an instant, my hearing seemed to go and I felt an overwhelming sense of claustrophobia. I spun around, thinking someone must be behind me, messing with me, but the sensation of closeness stayed pressing at my back. I spun around again, searching for an explanation. My head was fuzzy. I heard my footsteps, overwhelmingly loud, and I couldn’t hear anything else, almost as if my range of hearing was limited to my immediate surroundings. Like I was trapped in the pit. As soon as those words flashed through my head, the claustrophobia overwhelmed me, pushing up against the very air around my body. The silence built up inside my ears until all I could hear was my muffled footsteps, my desperate breathing, and the blood rushing faster and faster through my body.
I lunged for the edge, clambering up the side as fast as I could. Instantly upon passing over the edge the sounds of the late afternoon bore down on my ears. I stumbled and covered my ears, the chirping of the birds and rustling leaves almost too loud for me to bear.
It’s not that I was scared. Obviously, I was a little shaken up. As I hastened back towards Jackson’s dorm, I tried to rationalize what had just happened to me. Maybe I hadn’t drank enough water and I simply became dizzy. Maybe it was altitude sickness. Maybe a strange bug had bitten me and I temporarily lost my bearings. Nothing quite made sense. I tried to push it from my mind and focus on having a good first day, because soon I would be meeting Jackson’s college buddies.
When I got back to the dorm, Jackson was waiting for me. Fresh from the shower, his hair was damp and he was putting on a clean t-shirt. Pulling me into a hug, he expressed his excitement over my visit, asked me about my flight, what I thought about the campus—all the preliminary niceties. Internally, I breathed a sigh of relief. Even if he noticed, he didn’t pry and try to ask me about my slightly shaking hands, my pale face, or the vague disconnectedness with which I answered his questions.
That night eased my worries slightly. I ended up meeting Jackson’s group of friends and, together, we ventured into downtown Bennington. We hit a few bars and chilled at some of the many breweries in town. Live music, good company, and many, many beers did wonders on my nerves. By the end of the night, I had completely forgotten all about my encounter in the gravel pit. Jackson’s friends were nice guys, and I was too busy feeling proud about my best friend coming out of his shell in college. When he left, I had my doubts, but it was crystal clear that Jackson was really coming into himself at this school.
The festivities continued for the next few days: the guys were stoked to be done with their final exams and excited to connect with Jackson’s old friend, so we spent our time drinking and hanging out, bumping music and generally having a blast. It was almost enough for me to forget about one of the very reasons I was excited to be in Bennington in the first place.
It’s been a few days since that incident. I had even almost started to feel better about the whole thing. Maybe it was a mistake to poke around in old history, and maybe I should just focus on living my own life and fulfilling my own passions, working to heal nature as best as I can. But now Jackson and his friends want to go on a hike, and I’m starting to feel that same claustrophobia creeping back in. What the hell is out there, and why do I feel like I shouldn’t be messing with it?
Jackson chose the hike, not me. It was like him; he was the researcher, he was the one who looked at details, so he suggested we hike on the Long Trail. It intersected with the Appalachian Trail, and maybe I wasn’t paying attention when Jackson explained this to me, because it didn’t raise any alarms about the missing persons cases. Paula Welden went missing on the Long Trail, sure—but she wasn’t with a group of capable college guys like I was.
We packed some backpacks, crushed a beer or two for celebratory sakes, and set off on the trail. I let myself feel excited as we stomped through the trees, Jackson and his friends decked out in their matching red Bennington shirts from graduation. The hike was long. It was tedious. I don’t know when I first started noticing the weird aspects around us until about an hour in. The others didn’t pay any mind to these things, but I saw them: leaves drifting in the air with no breeze, snowflakes trapped in patches of sunlight, floating but unmoving, and that tree. It was a towering douglas fir, half-dead and reaching for the afternoon sun with bare branches. Each time I looked over my shoulder to check for hikers behind us or glanced ahead to see what awaited us, it was there. At first I assumed my eyes were playing tricks on me. After all, we had been hiking for a few hours.
Only when we stopped for a breather and Jackson pointed at a nearby stream did the weird things become too much for me. We were hiking on an incline, and we were exhausted, but when Jackson knelt beside this stream, it was flowing uphill. By then I was a little panicked. I freaked out, telling them that we needed to head back. Who cares if we hadn’t reached the halfway point yet? Was there even a halfway point? It felt like we had been walking for miles!
One of Jackson’s buddies opened up a map of the trail on his phone, and it was blank. He had service and bars, but the map was just…gone. Shocked with sudden fear, we immediately turned and headed back down the path. The sky darkened within minutes of us retracing our steps. Somehow, night was falling, despite us beginning the hike only a few hours prior. I tried to point it out, pulling Jackson aside when we slowed our pace to pass around a bottle of water. But Jackson was terrified and unfocused, and when I asked him what was wrong, we realized that one member of our five-person group was missing. How had we not noticed?
So, we made a U-turn and headed back up the mountain. Twenty minutes later, we found his torn university shirt. I turned the red fabric over in my hands, panicked and bewildered. When I looked up to scan our surroundings, I saw that same Douglas fir directly to my left. I was shocked, and the rest of the group must have noticed. We looked at each other and saw the panic rising on our faces. What the hell was happening?
I only had one goal at this point: we had to get down the mountain to call for help.
We decided to do our best to follow the trail on the way we came up, but only once daylight broke; it was difficult to make out the trail in the dark cover of the night, so I insisted it would be too dangerous. Someone could fall and get seriously injured, we could all get separated in the dark, or worse. So we did our best to hunker down and build a makeshift shelter to wait out the night, but it wasn’t easy. I can only describe the sounds we heard as otherworldly. Despite the lack of animals in the woods, nature seemed to be alive around us. The clicking of bugs kept me wide awake, but the noises were louder and deeper than I had ever heard. The baying of giant wolves, so close I imagined them coming up directly behind us. The snuffling of something in the underbrush, but from a cavernous creature larger than any moose could ever be.
Where had these animals been in the daytime? Why did it feel like they were surrounding us now?
I don’t know how I ever fell asleep, but when I awoke in the morning, the sun was beating down on us. From the sheen of sweat on my forehead to the dreadful pit in my stomach, I could tell something was horribly wrong.
When I scrambled to my feet and glanced around the area, I realized that only Jackson and I remained at our site. It was us, the clothes on our backs, and the demure amount of leftover supplies in our pockets: keys, gum wrappers, half-eaten power bars, and anything else that was ultimately unhelpful. We had been stranded on the forest floor, us against nature, as if something had swooped in from above and whisked Jackson’s friends under the pitch-black cover of the night.
I frantically took in our surroundings, peering into the bushes and pushing through thorny shrubbery. There were no tracks, no drag marks. Not even broken branches. I told Jackson we had to get out of there, and fast. I knew we needed to find the closest trailhead and book it down the mountain. Jackson ran so fast he nearly chipped a tooth on a steep hill. He was trying to keep up with me since I was faster by a long shot. All that sports stuff in high school paid off in the moment, so I almost felt bad leaving him in the dust. I called back over my shoulder to him every minute or so, making sure he was there.
He stuck with me for the most part. His t-shirt got torn by overhanging branches at one point, leaving a nasty scrape almost as red as the decimated fabric. I found myself struggling to remember if he was wearing that shirt to begin with, back when we started.
Then I decided I was losing it. It was like a fight against nature, Jackson and me against the blaring sun and sloping trail. Eventually, Jackson starts glaring menacingly at the passing scenery, cursing loudly and deliriously at everything surrounding us.
When we stumbled upon a trail marker, we barely had enough energy to celebrate. While we caught our breath, I tried to calm Jackson down. Something told me that cursing out Mother Nature wasn’t the best idea right now. Whatever was sicking the elements on us wouldn’t appreciate the nasty things he was saying about them. But he was terrified, and nothing I said could slap any reason into him. I had to lead us to safety, get us out of here.
Suddenly, I heard a sound in the distance. But unlike everything else we had heard so far, this one was man made. Jackson heard it too, and started yelling about a helicopter. He made a break off to the left, towards the sound, and I bolted after him. Somehow, he burst out into a tiny clearing.
Ripping off his red Bennington shirt, he started calling out and waving it in the air like a rescue flag. He jumped and shouted, but as the helicopter got closer, the unbelievable happened. The clearing started shrinking, tree branches reaching from either side to close the gap and obscure us from the view of the pilot. Jackson screamed in fury, cursing the forest like never before.
Then the chopper must have been lowering down towards the treelike because the wind picked up, blowing in circles around us like the blades were inches from our heads, faster and faster, more violent by the second.
The brush beneath our feet blew up in the air along with the topsoil and dead leaves, obscuring our vision. We could hear each other gasping for breath, trying to keep the debris out of our eyes and coughing. I flung my arms out into the space around me, calling for my best friend and reaching out for his hands. But then I felt something shift. The decaying leaves around me smelled stronger. The wind became more vicious. The earth trembled beneath my feet, and I thought I felt something looming above me, breathing down my neck but also looking straight into my unseeing eyes.
Then it clicked. Jackson's red shirt, the gravel pit, Paula's erratic behavior, the other missing hikers...something was picking these people off, luring them deeper into the woods where they were sure to never be seen again. Did the color red cause whatever it was to literally see red, like a sick, twisted joke? Like a giant bull in front of a matador? What kind of creature could it be? Such a stealthy hunter, a commanding presence that made man tremble at the sensation of its mere aura...I couldn't even think about it without snapping my mind.
Before the flurry of leaves and moist earth settled back onto the ground, I knew Jackson was gone. I knew the chopper hadn’t seen us and that I was on my own now. I tried not to panic as I felt like every hidden eye in the forest was staring me down, sizing me up. I took off blindly, but where to, I didn’t know. After what seemed like hours of desperately sprinting, I saw a pile of rocks in the distance. Shelter, I thought, and decided to rest there for a minute to get my wits back about me.
Then I had an idea. With what little juice I had in my phone and whatever cell service luck would afford me, I knew I had to send out a warning. For some reason, I didn’t think about myself. I didn’t think about dying, disappearing, or whatever had happened to my friends. If the nature around me would be the thing to end my life, so be it. I had decided to dedicate my life to nature long ago: to save it from my fellow man, to preserve its beauty, and to keep it out of the wrong hands, the people that wanted to use its power for evil and to bring about the harm of those around them. I know it sounds ridiculous to be thinking about when my life was at stake, but I knew it was what I needed to do.
From my makeshift hiding spot in the rocks, I began furiously typing my story with what little battery I had left on my phone. When my hands started cramping, I used the voice option. I didn’t care. I just had to get my story out there.
For an hour , I’d been trying to put it all down in words. I couldn't believe my luck, that my battery hadn’t run out yet.
I had almost gone to the end when I felt the same creeping silence begin to close in on me. It was as if the forest was falling silent around me, and that silence was racing in on all sides, but it was different from when I was in the gravel pit. There was more to the sensation this time, not just the sinking, breathless feeling and the loss of hearing.
Somewhere deep within the forest, but at the same time, only miles away, I heard an awful rumbling sound, something I’ve never heard before. Nothing like the helicopter, not even the giant animals I was convinced I had heard in the night. I can't even think of a word to describe it, but it filled me with a frantic kind of dread that I’ve never felt before. I feel it in the ground. My entire body wants to run as fast as I can, but it’s like I’m glued to the ground. I taste metal in my mouth like maybe I bit my cheek or the dirt from the wind or I bit on a rock, I spit and I can’t get it out. I’m going to open an app and copy and paste it so people can know while I still can type I’m shaking so hard they have to know.
And the smell I’m smelling it’s like fruit that’s gone ripe, but it keeps getting more ripe, a sickly sweetness that keeps building mixed with the smell of the richest earth imaginable.
This is happening now, I’m smelling this now and It’s it’s like I’m trapped under the shadow of some thing bigger something that’s taking the shadow away from the trees and I can’t see the shadow of the trees anymore and the ground around me is trembling. It’s like I can hear the trees calling out to whatever it is, that’s walking towards me or flying I can’t tell, everything is stretching and growing out towards me. No behind me above me something is coming. I’m I feel better right I feel better than I have in days or however long I’ve been out here I’m not thirsty anymore. I’m not hungry anymore. I feel fuller stronger smarter. My mind is overloading. I’m thinking of 1 million things like I don’t know if I can speak anymore it’s like, it’s like I’m fruit like I’m a ripening on the vine and this giant wings beating above me and the smell is too much I
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nosleep [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 06:04 Appropriate-Fig9009 Are these fairly priced?
2023.06.10 05:59 Tricky-Action-660 I'm afraid I already met the love of my life and I'm never really going to fall in love with anyone else again.
I know the title sounds dramatic, and I know it's not the end of the world if it ends up being true. It's just really sad to think about. I met my (27f) partner (37m) "Mike" four years ago and immediately fell hard. For a long time I just brushed the feelings off as new relationship energy. I was young, and got excited about any new relationship. But this feeling lasted for months, and every time we were together, I left feeling giddier and more lovedrunk than ever. And after a year, I finally admitted it to myself. I was in love, and maybe for the first time. I didn't tell him I loved him, not at first. If I kept it to myself, it didn't have to be real. He couldn't break my heart if he didn't know he had it, right? But it slipped out a few months later, when we were saying goodnight to each other. It was a casual "I love you," like you say to your family when you get off the phone, but from that point on, I didn't keep it a secret anymore. I loved him, and he loved me. But I still hate saying it. I hate saying it, because there's this invisible countdown clock to the end of our relationship as we know it. There is no happily ever after for us. I get to love him for another year, maybe five, maybe ten. But there's no growing old together. There's no moving in together, no meeting the in-laws, no marriage, no children, no building a life together. I don't know if I even want those things. But if I did, it would be with him.
When we met, we both had primary partners. I had a boyfriend of two years, and he had a girlfriend of ten years. I have since broken up with that primary and haven't seriously dated anyone else. Mike is still with his primary girlfriend, of course, and their relationship is so beautiful and I like her a lot and I think they are perfect together. They spent their formative years together. They became adults together and built a life together and shared experiences that I could never understand. This post isn't about her. Even if she were out of the picture, it wouldn't really change anything. The fact is, someday life is going to take us on separate paths. Neither of us have roots in this town where we live, and both of us are expecting major life changes within the next 1-5 years. If I get a job offer in another state, I'm leaving, and he isn't coming with me, and vice versa. Of course this wouldn't mean we never talk to each other again. I expect we would keep in touch, maybe check in with a text every couple of months. But it would mean no more cuddling on the couch every Wednesday night. No more stopping by with soup when I'm sick. No more weekend bike rides and no more last minute invites to the bar.
I've known this and understood this from the minute our relationship began. It was always meant to be temporary, short-term even. What bothers me is that I'm pretty sure I'm never going to feel this way about someone again. Believe me, I've tried. I've dated a lot in the past four years, and I have met so many interesting, kind, beautiful people. I've had flings that lasted a couple of months, and I have friends who I hook up with every once in a while. But I have never felt about anyone the way I feel about Mike, not even close. Sometimes I think it would be easier if I had never met Mike--then I would just think the lukewarm feelings I have about everyone else were as good as it gets. The way they sing about love in songs? The way it's described in books and poetry? I could go on imagining that those were exaggerations, or that I just wasn't the sort of person to get swept up in some epic romance. But I HAVE met Mike, and I HAVE known love. Now when I hear someone singing about love, I get it. I understand how it fills you up and makes you want to explode. I understand wanting to yell from the rooftops because you just can't contain your feelings. And I'm afraid that this is it for me. People talk about soulmates, they talk about finding "the one," and I used to think that was stupid because there are so many people on this planet that are amazing in so many different ways, and there are so many ways and reasons to fall in love, but after four years of trying, I'm beginning to think this is it. I found The One. And maybe I'm lucky, because if it really is so hard to find someone that you truly connect with, most people probably never find that kind of connection. But all I can think is how devastating it will be once we've separated, because I'll know how good it can get and I'll know what I'm missing out on.
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Tricky-Action-660 to
polyamory [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 05:54 PlatinumRooster The mount experience is kinda pants.
Before I begin, I'll just say that the CONTENT available for the horses, including those in the shop that I'll never touch, is all pretty good.
I've found a number of horses already, horse adornments, and trophies.
My favorite combo is the Light-Bearer with the Scosglen Barding armor. Of course, trotting around with the exaggerated swagger of a standard ATC member.
Anyway, onto the aforementioned 'pants'.
So, remember that issue from the betas where walking out of towns was almost impossible because of the broken instance loading? Remember how they fixed it for launch and it was awesome? Yeah, mounts break that because of their speed. In fact, mounts seem to break everything, everywhere, all at once.
Let's discuss.
- Random stopping
I'm kinda glad that mounts don't have seatbelts, because I'd rather fly off my mount at a bajillion miles an hour in one piece than get cut in half doing so. I'm not armor spec'd.
When I'm cruising around Sanctuary using Spur and I cross into another territory, even if it's through a seemingly wide open glade, my mount will get caught on seemingly nothing, or maybe the smallest pile of Ghoul shit in the middle of the road. Beats me, because I can't see it. This happens all the time when rounding corners as well. It's bloody frustrating.
- Speaking of Spur...
I truly don't know what the fuck it actually does when activating it multiple times. It says it makes the horse move faster, but relative to what? Sometimes when I click it, we'll enter a hearty gallop. Other times, my mount will be gifted with the kindred spirit of Seabiscuit and will move faster than I have time to react to.
And what about spamming it? Does it stack? Seems to sometimes, and other times it doesn't. Does stacking it make the Spur last longer, or just 1x, 2x, and 3x the speed for the original duration? Don't have a clue.
What about the times where I click it and my mount just ain't feelin' today and says 'naw fam', and just continues to trot? Just a very inconsistent experience.
- Ability dismounts
I straight up feel like Kung-Fu Panda sometimes flying off my mount as a giant angry hairy meat nugget... in slow motion. Again: this seems to be an issue with the speed of mounts. There's no rubberbanding or anything, which is the silver-lining I guess, but I'm literally in the air for up to two seconds watching myself fall with style. Additionally, akin to the issue with Spur, sometimes it doesn't even trigger, and then I'm sitting awkwardly in the middle of a pack of Lunatics hoping they don't laugh at me as I take the time to clunkily turn my mount around to try again.
- Celine Dion
Celine Dion had some pipes. I used to wake up to the shit at 2 in the morning all the time. Well, apparently, so does my horse. I wish to god I could muzzle his big beautiful stupid fucking face... because I'm tired of hearing it every 5 god damned seconds. It's ear splitting after the first two times.
Please let me mute him or only allow the whinny for the initial mount, or make it exceptionally rare.
TL;DR: plz fix kthx. fun game btw
submitted by
PlatinumRooster to
diablo4 [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 05:22 rubyblondie826 Looking for buyers (on ajpw) Username: Waterqueen0
| Hey y’all I have been playing animal jam a while but took a very long and am back and clearing inventory. I have like 24 shops and am selling everything from potions clothing and den items to rares, pets and pet items. I also have loads of crafting Crystals. I have gem items sapphire items and try to price fairly and lower than explorer some pretty good deals check it out if your looking to get some of your dream items or even off market items cheaper than explorer then check my shops out. If I’m on feel free to ask for someone lower or to offer a trade instead.Thank you will be restocking soon. submitted by rubyblondie826 to AnimalJam [link] [comments] |
2023.06.10 05:11 Beatleslover1960 Getting hit on
I saw a post earlier about how stank bought a ring to avoid getting hit on. I may just live in California, but she would NOT have to worry about getting hit on in my local bar. I live in a tiny town where guys tend to be desperate and even they wouldn’t even give her a shot. It must be a Michigan thing or something bc I can’t see any guy (with decent vision) going out of their way to talk to her around here.
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Beatleslover1960 to
christenwhitmansnark [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 05:08 tregratinator /r/MarvelVillainous will go dark on June 12th in protest of reddit’s API changes
Greetings everyone!
tl;dr:
/MarvelVillainous will be participating in the reddit blackout on June 12th in protest of the upcoming API changes.
Like many others, we’re concerned about the announced charges to the Reddit API and their impact on third party apps and vital mod tools. The changes will reduce the quality of access for many users, and for some users such as those with vision issues, may effectively lock them out of reddit.
Moreover, these changes represent a further deterioration in the relationships between Reddit and its user base. First ‘new’ reddit looks flashy but is regressive in functions and control. Much as we know we are hardly popular as a group, mods are expected to do more and more, but the tools we have to achieve it are incredibly few. Most key tools are not provided by Reddit, and rely on the goodwill of developers who get no support from Reddit.
Now reddit seems to be taking several steps to pump up the userbase and inflate their revenue and value, presumably for an IPO (selling shares in Reddit). This ignores that the assets of Reddit are the users who create content and interact with the sites, and the unpaid janitors of the mod community. Without both groups’ goodwill and engagement, Reddit could go from a vibrant community to a ghost town overnight.
Standard explanation of the protest below. If you want it really fast, look at this image.
What’s going on?
A recent Reddit policy change threatens to kill many beloved third-party mobile apps, making a great many quality-of-life features not seen in the official mobile app permanently inaccessible to users.
On May 31, 2023, Reddit announced they were raising the price to make calls to their API from being free to a level that will kill every third party app on Reddit, from Apollo to Reddit is Fun to Narwhal to BaconReader.
Even if you’re not a mobile user and don’t use any of those apps, this is a step toward killing other ways of customizing Reddit, such as Reddit Enhancement Suite or the use of the old.reddit.com desktop interface .
This isn’t only a problem on the user level: many subreddit moderators depend on tools only available outside the official app to keep their communities on-topic and spam-free.
What’s the plan?
On June 12th, many subreddits will be going dark to protest this policy. Some will return after 48 hours: others will go away permanently unless the issue is adequately addressed, since many moderators aren’t able to put in the work they do with the poor tools available through the official app. This isn’t something any of us do lightly: we do what we do because we love Reddit, and we truly believe this change will make it impossible to keep doing what we love.
The two-day blackout isn’t the goal, and it isn’t the end. Should things reach the 14th with no sign of Reddit choosing to fix what they’ve broken, we’ll use the community and buzz we’ve built between then and now as a tool for further action.
What can you do as a user?
• Complain. Message the mods of
/reddit.com, who are the admins of the site: message
reddit: submit a support request: comment in relevant threads on
/reddit, such as this one, leave a negative review on their official iOS or Android app- and sign your username in support to this post. • Spread the word. Rabble-rouse on related subreddits. Meme it up, make it spicy. Bitch about it to your cat. Suggest anyone you know who moderates a subreddit join the coordinated mod effort at
/ModCoord. • Boycott and spread the word…to Reddit’s competition! Stay off Reddit entirely on June 12th through the 13th- instead, take to your favorite non-Reddit platform of choice and make some noise in support! • Don’t be a jerk. As upsetting this may be, threats, profanity and vandalism will be worse than useless in getting people on our side. Please make every effort to be as restrained, polite, reasonable and law-abiding as possible.
What can you do as a moderator?
• Join the coordinated effort over at
/ModCoord • Make a sticky post showing your support, A template has been created here you can use or modify to your liking, and be sure to crosspost it to
/ModCoord.
Thank you for your patience and keep being the Villains we love!
/MarvelVillainous Mod Team
submitted by
tregratinator to
MarvelVillainous [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 05:07 tregratinator /r/DisneyVillainous will go dark on June 12th in protest of reddit’s API changes
Greetings everyone!
tl;dr:
/DisneyVillainous will be participating in the reddit blackout on June 12th in protest of the upcoming API changes.
Like many others, we’re concerned about the announced charges to the Reddit API and their impact on third party apps and vital mod tools. The changes will reduce the quality of access for many users, and for some users such as those with vision issues, may effectively lock them out of reddit.
Moreover, these changes represent a further deterioration in the relationships between Reddit and its user base. First ‘new’ reddit looks flashy but is regressive in functions and control. Much as we know we are hardly popular as a group, mods are expected to do more and more, but the tools we have to achieve it are incredibly few. Most key tools are not provided by Reddit, and rely on the goodwill of developers who get no support from Reddit.
Now reddit seems to be taking several steps to pump up the userbase and inflate their revenue and value, presumably for an IPO (selling shares in Reddit). This ignores that the assets of Reddit are the users who create content and interact with the sites, and the unpaid janitors of the mod community. Without both groups’ goodwill and engagement, Reddit could go from a vibrant community to a ghost town overnight.
Standard explanation of the protest below. If you want it really fast, look at this image.
What’s going on?
A recent Reddit policy change threatens to kill many beloved third-party mobile apps, making a great many quality-of-life features not seen in the official mobile app permanently inaccessible to users.
On May 31, 2023, Reddit announced they were raising the price to make calls to their API from being free to a level that will kill every third party app on Reddit, from Apollo to Reddit is Fun to Narwhal to BaconReader.
Even if you’re not a mobile user and don’t use any of those apps, this is a step toward killing other ways of customizing Reddit, such as Reddit Enhancement Suite or the use of the old.reddit.com desktop interface .
This isn’t only a problem on the user level: many subreddit moderators depend on tools only available outside the official app to keep their communities on-topic and spam-free.
What’s the plan?
On June 12th, many subreddits will be going dark to protest this policy. Some will return after 48 hours: others will go away permanently unless the issue is adequately addressed, since many moderators aren’t able to put in the work they do with the poor tools available through the official app. This isn’t something any of us do lightly: we do what we do because we love Reddit, and we truly believe this change will make it impossible to keep doing what we love.
The two-day blackout isn’t the goal, and it isn’t the end. Should things reach the 14th with no sign of Reddit choosing to fix what they’ve broken, we’ll use the community and buzz we’ve built between then and now as a tool for further action.
What can you do as a user?
• Complain. Message the mods of
/reddit.com, who are the admins of the site: message
reddit: submit a support request: comment in relevant threads on
/reddit, such as this one, leave a negative review on their official iOS or Android app- and sign your username in support to this post. • Spread the word. Rabble-rouse on related subreddits. Meme it up, make it spicy. Bitch about it to your cat. Suggest anyone you know who moderates a subreddit join the coordinated mod effort at
/ModCoord. • Boycott and spread the word…to Reddit’s competition! Stay off Reddit entirely on June 12th through the 13th- instead, take to your favorite non-Reddit platform of choice and make some noise in support! • Don’t be a jerk. As upsetting this may be, threats, profanity and vandalism will be worse than useless in getting people on our side. Please make every effort to be as restrained, polite, reasonable and law-abiding as possible.
What can you do as a moderator?
• Join the coordinated effort over at
/ModCoord • Make a sticky post showing your support, A template has been created here you can use or modify to your liking, and be sure to crosspost it to
/ModCoord.
Thank you for your patience and keep being the Villains we love!
/DisneyVillainous Mod Team
submitted by
tregratinator to
DisneyVillainous [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 05:03 98756256521 Canker-Rid
So, it worked for me. Gainsayers, I'm not endorsing the product and I know nothing works for everybody, I'm just adding my experience as a data point which hopefully is useful to someone.
TLDR: It shut down a full blown cank and stopped a budding one from going full bloom.
I was going through a spate of cankers after not having had them for quite a while. Additionally, I had two right next to each other one directly starting after the other ended; each taking something like 14 solid days each to cycle so it really felt like one big whole-month canker sore, it was exhausting. Additionally, I was getting a budding one on my lower lip and it was just breaking into that "slicing" pain in at that time a tiny area that inevitably was going to go full blast. I had also recently had one under my tongue which oddly was the only one I've ever had there in all my decades of dealing with canks. Ironically I recently had a blood draw and I remarked about the needle and that it was far less painful than these canker sores I'd been dealing with for weeks and months on end.
I had ordered Canker-Rid many years ago but I had forgotten about it, it was $20 but the bottle lasts foreeeeevvvver and it doesn't seem to go bad. Recently it's just been agony dealing with these and I was trying the unlit match method (didn't work at all for me) as well as loading down on Kanka, which I agree with many other folks who say that while this does provide some temporary numbing, it tends to worsen the cank overall.
At my wits end and willing to try anything in my arsenal I broke out the Canker-Rid again. I was lazy and didn't even bother to dry the areas, which were the upper and lower lip. I put it on and it doesn't really sting when applied, but it takes the pain away, not like Kanka where it's just masking the pain, but it's actually doing something that's taking away the cause of it, somehow.
The effect I noticed was that it stopped the canker sore metabolism in its tracks. Whatever the mechanism is that causes canker sores to expand and spread was arrested by this substance. I think given its heavy tannins it acts as some kind of astringent, but I don't know what the mechanism of action is any more than we know what the mechanism of action of canker sores themselves is. Anyway, the canker sore on the upper lip was cank#2 and it had peaked and was slowly on the way out but based on cank#1 it had many more days to go before the intense pain would subside. Lower lip cank was just budding and had just broken open into that extremely painful phase, but was just a pin prick in size, starting to grow into a full-sized one.
After applying it to both areas, the large upper cank drastically reduced in pain in 24 hours and even more so in 48 hours, and was essentially pain free at 72 hours. The lower lip cank was stopped cold where it was at and didn't go into full bloom. It stopped at the pin prick size, and then the pain went away essentially the next day, and the healing process fairly quickly sealed it back up. The Canker-Rid aborted the cank at an early stage and the body's natural healing process inevitably took over and cleaned up the area.
I had actually started using it on the upper lip cank several days earlier but stopped as I went out of town and didn't bring it with me. Sure enough, once the cop was not on the scene it went full bloom and was just agony for days. The moment I got back I treated it with this liquid several times a day, and as noted, it halted all canker activity and the healing process then swooped in and sewed it all up quickly.
Again, YMMV, but this was my experience. I'm going to keep this bottle in even higher prominence on my medicine cabinet than Kanka and make sure it's on hand for when my next canker sore inevitably makes its appearance.
Hopefully this is useful to someone.
submitted by
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CankerSores [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 05:03 TrueGod92 A Woman Scorned
Dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
I come to you today with a heavy heart and a message that must be shared. The end of days is coming.
We have all heard the prophecies of the book of Revelation and the signs of the times that Jesus spoke of. Wars and rumors of wars, earthquakes, famine, and disease are on the rise. The world seems to be spiraling out of control, and it's easy to feel overwhelmed and hopeless.
But as Christians, we must remember that our hope is not in this world. Our hope is in Christ, who conquered death and promised to return one day to make all things new.
We must also remember that the end of days does not mean the end of the world. It means the end of the current age and the beginning of a new one. A time when Christ will reign supreme, and all things will be made right.
But until that day comes, we must be vigilant. We must stay true to our faith, even when it's difficult. We must love our neighbors, even when they don't love us back. We must pray for our leaders, even when we disagree with them.
And we must share the good news of Christ with those who have yet to hear it. For when the end of days comes, it will be too late for those who have not accepted Christ as their Savior.
So let us not be afraid of the end of days. Instead, let us embrace it as a time of hope and anticipation. A time when we will finally see our Lord face to face and be with him forever.
May the peace of Christ be with you all. Amen.
As I sit here listening to the preacher's words, I can't help but feel completely detached from everything he's saying. It's like I'm watching a movie, but I'm not really there.
I used to be a devout Christian, but lately, something in me has changed. I feel like I'm going through the motions, but my heart isn't really in it.
The thought of the end of days doesn't really faze me anymore. In fact, sometimes I wonder if it would just be easier if it all ended. The world is so messed up, and I don't see how a loving God could let all this suffering happen.
I used to pray every night, but now I don't even know what to say. It feels like my faith has been drained out of me, and I'm left feeling empty and alone.
I know I should be seeking help or talking to someone about this, but I feel like no one would understand. My friends and family are all strong believers, and I don't want to disappoint them or be seen as a failure.
So, I continue to go through the motions, hoping that one day my faith will return. But as time goes on, I become more and more convinced that it's gone for good.
The end of days no longer holds any significance to me. It's just another event in a world that's already lost its meaning. And I don't know if I'll ever be able to find my way back to the faith that once gave me hope and purpose.
As I watch the news of the plague spreading across the world, I feel a sense of sadness and despair wash over me. The world is already so broken, and now this?
I used to believe that God had a plan, that everything happened for a reason. But now, I can't help but feel like we're all just pawns in some cruel game. How could a loving God let something like this happen?
Despite my doubts and questions, I still find myself praying. But it's more out of habit than anything else. I don't even know who or what I'm praying to anymore.
As the days go on, the situation worsens. People are dying left and right, and the world as we know it is falling apart. And yet, I still don't feel the sense of urgency or fear that I know I should.
Maybe it's because I've already lost my faith, or maybe it's just a defense mechanism. But I can't help but feel like this is all just a part of the cycle of life and death. We're born, we live, we die. It's all inevitable.
As I watch the world around me crumble, I can't help but wonder what the point of it all is. If there is a God, why would he let his creation suffer like this? And if there isn't, then what's the point of anything?
I know that these are dark thoughts, but I can't help but feel like I'm just being honest with myself. The end of days no longer holds any significance to me, because it feels like we've been living in the end of days for a long time now. what is faith but a mask we all wear. I think this as the mobs of people pull me from my home and hoist me onto a crudely built cross As I hang there, my arms stretched out and pain coursing through my body, I wonder if this is what it means to be faithful. To suffer and die for a belief that may or may not be true.as I hang here from this cross I can only describe it as an excruciating pain. My body feels heavy and every breath I take is a struggle. My hands and feet are nailed to the cross, and the blood is slowly trickling down my limbs. The heat of the sun beats down on me, and the sweat drips into my eyes, blurring my vision.
As the hours pass, my strength begins to fade, and I feel my life slipping away. I know that my death will be in vain. I offer nothing but hate and pain to those who have condemned me, and I ask my so called Father in heaven why he would allow this.
But as the mob below me cheers and jeers, I can't help but feel like this is all pointless. What does it matter if I believe in God or not? Does it really make a difference in the grand scheme of things?
I used to think that faith was a beautiful thing. That it gave people hope and purpose. But now, all I see is the violence and hatred that it can inspire.
As my vision starts to fade and my breathing becomes shallow, I wonder if I made the right choice. Was it worth it to hold onto my disbelief, even if it meant dying for it?
But in the end, it doesn't matter. Whether I lived or died, the world would keep turning. People would continue to believe what they wanted, and others would suffer for it.
As the light fades from my eyes, I take comfort in the fact that I stayed true to myself. That even in the face of death, I refused to wear the mask of faith.In my final moments, I feel a sense of release. The pain fades away, and I am enveloped in hatred and darkness. coughing blood spews from my mouth, as it falls to the ground to causes a hellish earthquake felt across the planet As the blood spills from my lips and hits the ground, I feel a surge of power coursing through me. It's as if all my pain and suffering has been transformed into something greater.
The earth shakes beneath me, the ground cracking and splitting open as the energy radiates outwards. People scream and run in terror as buildings topple and the very fabric of reality seems to fray.
But even in the midst of this chaos, I can't help but feel a sense of peace. I know that this is the end of my journey, that I have finally found my purpose.
As the last of my strength leaves me, I close my eyes and surrender to the darkness. And in that moment, I know that my legacy will live on. That the world will never forget the sacrifice I made, and the power that I unleashed.
For better or for worse, I have changed everything. And even in death, I will continue to shape the world around me.
Dark tendrils erupt from the ground and wrap around my body, I feel a sudden jolt of pain, followed by an overwhelming sensation of heat. The ground opens up beneath me, and I'm pulled downward into a swirling vortex of smoke and fire.
As I descend deeper into the underworld, I feel my body transforming. My flesh falls away, replaced by something darker and more powerful. I am reborn as a ruler of the damned, my eyes glowing with an unholy light.
The denizens of the underworld bow before me, recognizing my power and my authority. I am a master of the shadows, a lord of the abyss. And as I survey the landscape before me, I know that I have finally found my true calling.
No longer bound by the limitations of mortal flesh, I am free to explore the darkest corners of the universe. I am free to unleash my power and my wrath upon those who would dare to challenge me.
And as I bask in the glory of my new existence, I know that I will never again be bound by the petty concerns of the living. For I am now a creature of the night, a harbinger of doom, and a ruler of the damned. With my newfound power, I rise up from the depths of the underworld and make my way back to the world of the living. My mission is clear - to seek out those who had wronged me and make them pay for their sins.
As I walk among the living, I am a shadowy figure, barely visible to mortal eyes. But those who have wronged me can feel my presence, and they tremble in fear.
One by one, I seek out my enemies, and I strike them down with the force of my wrath. They scream and beg for mercy, but I am beyond mercy now. I am a creature of vengeance, and I will not rest until they have all been punished.
As I continue on my quest for revenge, I realize that my power has no limits. I am stronger than any mortal, and I am immune to their feeble attempts to stop me.
And so I continue to wreak havoc on those who have wronged me, until finally, I am satisfied. My revenge is complete, and I can finally rest.
But even in death, I am still a ruler of the damned. And should anyone ever cross me again, they will know the full extent of my wrath.
submitted by
TrueGod92 to
joinmeatthecampfire [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 05:02 TrueGod92 A Woman Scorned
Dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
I come to you today with a heavy heart and a message that must be shared. The end of days is coming.
We have all heard the prophecies of the book of Revelation and the signs of the times that Jesus spoke of. Wars and rumors of wars, earthquakes, famine, and disease are on the rise. The world seems to be spiraling out of control, and it's easy to feel overwhelmed and hopeless.
But as Christians, we must remember that our hope is not in this world. Our hope is in Christ, who conquered death and promised to return one day to make all things new.
We must also remember that the end of days does not mean the end of the world. It means the end of the current age and the beginning of a new one. A time when Christ will reign supreme, and all things will be made right.
But until that day comes, we must be vigilant. We must stay true to our faith, even when it's difficult. We must love our neighbors, even when they don't love us back. We must pray for our leaders, even when we disagree with them.
And we must share the good news of Christ with those who have yet to hear it. For when the end of days comes, it will be too late for those who have not accepted Christ as their Savior.
So let us not be afraid of the end of days. Instead, let us embrace it as a time of hope and anticipation. A time when we will finally see our Lord face to face and be with him forever.
May the peace of Christ be with you all. Amen.
As I sit here listening to the preacher's words, I can't help but feel completely detached from everything he's saying. It's like I'm watching a movie, but I'm not really there.
I used to be a devout Christian, but lately, something in me has changed. I feel like I'm going through the motions, but my heart isn't really in it.
The thought of the end of days doesn't really faze me anymore. In fact, sometimes I wonder if it would just be easier if it all ended. The world is so messed up, and I don't see how a loving God could let all this suffering happen.
I used to pray every night, but now I don't even know what to say. It feels like my faith has been drained out of me, and I'm left feeling empty and alone.
I know I should be seeking help or talking to someone about this, but I feel like no one would understand. My friends and family are all strong believers, and I don't want to disappoint them or be seen as a failure.
So, I continue to go through the motions, hoping that one day my faith will return. But as time goes on, I become more and more convinced that it's gone for good.
The end of days no longer holds any significance to me. It's just another event in a world that's already lost its meaning. And I don't know if I'll ever be able to find my way back to the faith that once gave me hope and purpose.
As I watch the news of the plague spreading across the world, I feel a sense of sadness and despair wash over me. The world is already so broken, and now this?
I used to believe that God had a plan, that everything happened for a reason. But now, I can't help but feel like we're all just pawns in some cruel game. How could a loving God let something like this happen?
Despite my doubts and questions, I still find myself praying. But it's more out of habit than anything else. I don't even know who or what I'm praying to anymore.
As the days go on, the situation worsens. People are dying left and right, and the world as we know it is falling apart. And yet, I still don't feel the sense of urgency or fear that I know I should.
Maybe it's because I've already lost my faith, or maybe it's just a defense mechanism. But I can't help but feel like this is all just a part of the cycle of life and death. We're born, we live, we die. It's all inevitable.
As I watch the world around me crumble, I can't help but wonder what the point of it all is. If there is a God, why would he let his creation suffer like this? And if there isn't, then what's the point of anything?
I know that these are dark thoughts, but I can't help but feel like I'm just being honest with myself. The end of days no longer holds any significance to me, because it feels like we've been living in the end of days for a long time now. what is faith but a mask we all wear. I think this as the mobs of people pull me from my home and hoist me onto a crudely built cross As I hang there, my arms stretched out and pain coursing through my body, I wonder if this is what it means to be faithful. To suffer and die for a belief that may or may not be true.as I hang here from this cross I can only describe it as an excruciating pain. My body feels heavy and every breath I take is a struggle. My hands and feet are nailed to the cross, and the blood is slowly trickling down my limbs. The heat of the sun beats down on me, and the sweat drips into my eyes, blurring my vision.
As the hours pass, my strength begins to fade, and I feel my life slipping away. I know that my death will be in vain. I offer nothing but hate and pain to those who have condemned me, and I ask my so called Father in heaven why he would allow this.
But as the mob below me cheers and jeers, I can't help but feel like this is all pointless. What does it matter if I believe in God or not? Does it really make a difference in the grand scheme of things?
I used to think that faith was a beautiful thing. That it gave people hope and purpose. But now, all I see is the violence and hatred that it can inspire.
As my vision starts to fade and my breathing becomes shallow, I wonder if I made the right choice. Was it worth it to hold onto my disbelief, even if it meant dying for it?
But in the end, it doesn't matter. Whether I lived or died, the world would keep turning. People would continue to believe what they wanted, and others would suffer for it.
As the light fades from my eyes, I take comfort in the fact that I stayed true to myself. That even in the face of death, I refused to wear the mask of faith.In my final moments, I feel a sense of release. The pain fades away, and I am enveloped in hatred and darkness. coughing blood spews from my mouth, as it falls to the ground to causes a hellish earthquake felt across the planet As the blood spills from my lips and hits the ground, I feel a surge of power coursing through me. It's as if all my pain and suffering has been transformed into something greater.
The earth shakes beneath me, the ground cracking and splitting open as the energy radiates outwards. People scream and run in terror as buildings topple and the very fabric of reality seems to fray.
But even in the midst of this chaos, I can't help but feel a sense of peace. I know that this is the end of my journey, that I have finally found my purpose.
As the last of my strength leaves me, I close my eyes and surrender to the darkness. And in that moment, I know that my legacy will live on. That the world will never forget the sacrifice I made, and the power that I unleashed.
For better or for worse, I have changed everything. And even in death, I will continue to shape the world around me.
Dark tendrils erupt from the ground and wrap around my body, I feel a sudden jolt of pain, followed by an overwhelming sensation of heat. The ground opens up beneath me, and I'm pulled downward into a swirling vortex of smoke and fire.
As I descend deeper into the underworld, I feel my body transforming. My flesh falls away, replaced by something darker and more powerful. I am reborn as a ruler of the damned, my eyes glowing with an unholy light.
The denizens of the underworld bow before me, recognizing my power and my authority. I am a master of the shadows, a lord of the abyss. And as I survey the landscape before me, I know that I have finally found my true calling.
No longer bound by the limitations of mortal flesh, I am free to explore the darkest corners of the universe. I am free to unleash my power and my wrath upon those who would dare to challenge me.
And as I bask in the glory of my new existence, I know that I will never again be bound by the petty concerns of the living. For I am now a creature of the night, a harbinger of doom, and a ruler of the damned. With my newfound power, I rise up from the depths of the underworld and make my way back to the world of the living. My mission is clear - to seek out those who had wronged me and make them pay for their sins.
As I walk among the living, I am a shadowy figure, barely visible to mortal eyes. But those who have wronged me can feel my presence, and they tremble in fear.
One by one, I seek out my enemies, and I strike them down with the force of my wrath. They scream and beg for mercy, but I am beyond mercy now. I am a creature of vengeance, and I will not rest until they have all been punished.
As I continue on my quest for revenge, I realize that my power has no limits. I am stronger than any mortal, and I am immune to their feeble attempts to stop me.
And so I continue to wreak havoc on those who have wronged me, until finally, I am satisfied. My revenge is complete, and I can finally rest.
But even in death, I am still a ruler of the damned. And should anyone ever cross me again, they will know the full extent of my wrath.
submitted by
TrueGod92 to
scarystories [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 04:55 everydogday My dads wife gave my 15 month old Tequila
Edit:
I wrote year in the body, but he is indeed 15 months.
So my Dad and I have a good relationship, but it's strained going back to when I was in high school (36 now) and my parents got divorced. My sister is no contact with him, in part to how his wife (remarried) behaves and has caused some serious issues.
I don't see my Dad that frequently anymore, a few times a year even though he only lives a few hours away. He's starting to slow down, and having health problems and I recognize time together is precious and really have made an effort to see him more, especially now that he is a grandfather as of 15 months ago.
His wife is a really nasty woman. This is an understatement and I could write a novel about her antics, but she has apologized and started medication and made an effort to control herself better.
I am big on second (and even third and forth chances) so I have been amicable with her mainly to maintain a relationship with my father.
They came into town for the night, mainly because his wife wanted to see her dentist that's 2 hours away, but a convenient opportunity for them to spend time. They were to stay at a hotel close by, we don't have a big house and extra space for them to be comfortable.
They got here, everything was "fine" and 30 minutes later, my wife sees her offering a glass of tequila on the rocks to my 15 month old son. My wife calls her out and says what the he'll are you doing?
She responds defensively, saying it's only a little and proceeds to pull a tequila soaked ice cube out her glass to offer it to him. At this point my wife starts yelling and all hell breaks loose. I calm and firmly explain to my Dad's wife that it's not OK, and I don't care if it's orange juice she needs to get permission to offer him anything whatsoever, especially alcohol.
She never had kids of her own for what its worth. She freaks out, offended by my wife and I giving her a hard time, and yells to my Dad to take her home. I explain that she can simply apologize for her mistake and respect our rules as parents but "her feeling" were hurt.
They leave and my dad calls me a few minutes later, he said she is taking his car back home with or without him and he wanted to know if I would drive him home (2 hours each way) so he can stay and hang out.
At this point, I'm angry and frustrated with the situation and said that maybe he should just come down another weekend without her. He apologized and that was that.
30 minutes later, his wife shows up at my door. I'm too pissed off at everything, and frustrated that she keeps getting in the way of an opportunity for me to spend quality time with my father and son to talk to her. My wife went to talk to her and she apologized and was upset and then she asked for the food they had brought (KFC) back (wtf).
Later, I get a text from my Dad that he wants to have breakfast together in the morning and his wife knows she was wrong so we can smooth things over. I responded that I had already made plans because they told us they were going hone.
I am sick of being jerked around. I don't have time to do anything for myself anymore and we had been planning this weekend for over a month. For them to pull the plug over something his stupid wife did that was fucked up really pissed me off. It's not fair to me or my wife, we work all week and as new parents and rarely have time to do anything fun or for ourselves. We carved this weekend out for them, and then they bail, only to ask to have plans the next day to smooth over there bullshit.
I wanted to send the message that if they don't respect our time and rules as parents they loose that privilege and they don't get to just flip flop on when we see them.
Did we have a right to be that pissed about her offering "a tiny bit of tequila"?
Did I handle this the right way?
Why is something like spending quality time as a family so fucking difficult?
I apologize for the rant, just a tired and frustrated Dad with a lack of fulfillment venting.
How was your day?
submitted by
everydogday to
daddit [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 04:51 Content-Bathroom-434 My sister and her boyfriend are out of the honeymoon phase, and they’re fighting over Animal Crossing.
They’re spending a lot of time together lately because he got injured while they were on a trip (bad fall, broken ribs, he’s on the mend, etc.) and he needs help with stuff while recovering. Because most of the time that they spend together is in my sister’s apartment, he started getting interested in Animal Crossing.
Since he’s getting so into it, my sister made him a profile on her Switch, reset the game (she had been wanting to do this for a while), established herself as an islander, and helped set him up on her island… and it hasn’t been easy. Long story short, he doesn’t play well with others in a game like this (he also doesn’t play video games at all). He doesn’t share the island well and gets upset when she cuts down certain trees, gathers materials that he wanted to gather, or dig up fossils that he wanted to dig up. At one point she logged on and he had designated A LOT of space toward carrots. Just carrots, nothing else. He’ll dig up all 4-6 fossils, but when she asks him to leave some in the future he doesn’t believe that there aren’t more for her to find. When she was putting together the three kits for Tom Nook with the various outdoor items that need to be placed near plot, he took one of the items and sold it because it was a hot item rather than make it himself (he didn’t think it was a big deal and said that he doesn’t get as many opportunities as her to make bells — are there tax brackets in ACNH? Because if so, she’s likely in a higher one than him). For her character to progress in the game, she has to travel to other islands instead of staying on her own island. I think shots were fired on both sides, whether intentional or not.
I didn’t make this post to parse out who’s right or wrong — I don’t care about that. It’s the first time that my sister has shared an island and I think they both have lessons to learn throughout this process.
All that said, have any of you had conflict with someone while sharing an ACNH island and, if so, how did you resolve it? She texted him today and suggested town council meetings every couple days so they could be on the same page and respect each other’s games, but I’m not sure that it’s realistic.
I’m sorry for them that the honeymoon phase is over, but I love that their first big conflict (that they needed to take a few hours of space for) is over Animal Crossing 😂
submitted by
Content-Bathroom-434 to
AnimalCrossing [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 04:51 docXfamas [H] June Choice and other bundled games [W] Paypal, TF2 keys
Note:
- All keys are primarily from US/NA region
- My list maybe slightly outdated so I apologize in advance if some of the games mentioned are already traded/Sold.
- I accept XBOX keys as well.
- I accept PayPal only via goods and services so all transactions will include fees.
- My Wishlist, I am mostly uninterested in other games.
HAVE
JUNE 2023 games - Curse of the Dead Gods
- Ghostwire: Tokyo
- Remnant: From the Ashes - Complete Edition
- Eternal Threads
- GRIME
- Honey, I Joined a Cult
- Meeple Station
- Turbo Golf Racing
MAY MADNESS MULTIPLAYER - Generation Zero® x 2
- Midnight Ghost Hunt x 2
- Northgard x 2
- Borderlands 3: Super Deluxe Edition x 2
- Destiny 2: Beyond Light
- Gloria Victis x 2
- PULSAR: Lost Colony x 2
MAY 2023 games - Behind the Frame: The Finest Scenery x 2
- Bendy and the Dark Revival x 3
- Builder Simulator x 2
- Operation Tango x 2
- Spiritfarer®: Farewell Edition x 2
- The Invisible Hand x 2
- Warhammer 40,000: Chaos Gate - Daemonhunters x 4
- Windjammers 2 x 3
APRIL 2023 games - Aliens: Fireteam Elite x 5
- DEATH STRANDING DIRECTOR'S CUT x 4
- Founders' Fortune x 1
- Life is Strange 2 Complete Season (incl. Mascot Bundle DLC) x 5
- Monster Prom 2: Monster Camp x 2
- Revita x 2
- Rollerdrome NA region x 4
- The Life and Suffering of Sir Brante x 2
MARCH 2023 games - BIOMUTANT x 2
- Demon Turf x 2
- Edge Of Eternity x 3
- Golden Light x 3
- Hero's Hour (NA Region) x 4
- Jurassic World Evolution 2 x 2
- Monster Crown x 3
- Rogue Lords x 3
Safe in Our World Charity Bundle 2023 - A Little Golf Journey x 2
- Arcade Paradise - Arcade Paradise EP x 2
- Chivalry: Medieval Warfare x 2
- Eternal Threads x 2
- Field of Glory II x 2
- Hue x 2
- Ice Age: Scrat's Nutty Adventure
- Indivisible x 2
- Murder by Numbers
- Perfect x 2
- PlateUp!
- Rescue Party: Live! x 2
- Rise of the Slime x 2
- Songbringer
- Soul Axiom Rebooted x 2
- Spiritfarer®: Farewell Edition x 2
- Steel Rats x 2
- STONE x 2
- Strange Brigade x 2
- Teacup
- The Last Campfire x 2
- Turbo Golf Racing x 2
- Warhammer 40,000: Gladius - Relics of War x 2
- White Day: A Labyrinth Named School x 2
- Sifu Deluxe Edition Upgrade Bundle x 2
FEBRUARY 2023 games - Fallout + Fallout 76
- Five Dates x 2
- Fobia - St. Dinfna Hotel x 3
- Othercide
- Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous - Enhanced Edition x 2
- ScourgeBringer x 2
- Shady Part of Me x 2
Survival Instinct Bundle - SCUM x 2
- Starsand x 2
- State of Decay 2 x 2
- SurrounDead x 2
- The Long Dark: Survival Edition x 2
- Volcanoids
JANUARY 2023 games DECEMBER 2022 Monthly Bundle Leftovers - Greedfall
- Wasteland 3
- Blade Assault
- Super Magbot
- TOEM
- Where the Water Tastes Like Wine
Black Friday VR Voyager's Pack - A Fisherman's Tale
- Car Mechanic Simulator VR
- Cook-Out
- I Expect You To Die
- Sairento VR
- Shooty Fruity
- SUPERHOT VR
- The Curious Tale of the Stolen Pets
- The Wizards - Dark Times
- Until You Fall
OTHER KEYS - Agatha Christie - Hercule Poirot: The First Cases
- The Smurfs - Mission Vileaf
- Anna's Quest
- AtmaSphere
- BATTLETECH
- Cardaclysm
- Dead Age 2: The Zombie Survival RPG
- Derange
- DISTRAINT 2 x 2
- Driftland: The Magic Revival
- Enclave (Gold)
- Everreach: Project Eden
- Fantasy Blacksmith
- Golf Club Wasteland
- Heal
- INDUSTRIA
- Interplanetary: Enhanced Edition
- Jack Orlando: Director's Cut
- Journey of a Roach
- Last Inua
- LEAVES - The Journey
- LEGO Batman 3: Beyond Gotham
- LEGO Marvel Super Heroes
- LEGO® MARVEL's Avengers
- LEGO® The Hobbit™
- Main Assembly
- Majesty 2 Collection
- My Big Sister
- Noosphere
- OUTBUDDIES DX
- Paw Paw Paw
- Pesterquest
- Plants vs. Zombies: Battle for Neighborville (ORIGIN KEY)
- PUBG: Battlegrounds – Golden G-Coin Box
- Red Wings: Aces of the Sky
- Seed Hunter x 2
- Ship Simulator Extremes
- Shooting Stars!
- Smart Factory Tycoon
- Space Cows
- Stars End
- Stubbs the Zombie in Rebel Without a Pulse
- The Deed II
- The LEGO Movie - Videogame
- The LEGO NINJAGO Movie Video Game
- The Textorcist: The Story of Ray Bibbia
- The Town of Light
- Truck Racer
- Warhammer 40,000: Mechanicus
- Wildfire
- Worms Clan Wars
- Zanzarah: The Hidden Portal
- The House of Da Vinci (ROW)
NOVEMBER 2022 Monthly Bundle Leftovers - Kingdoms of Amalur: Re-Reckoning FATE Edition
- Raji: An Ancient Epic
- Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun - Aiko's Choice
- UnMetal
- Roboquest x 2
- Morbid: The Seven Acolytes
- Eldest Souls
2K MEGAHITS BUNDLE - Hidden & Dangerous 2: Courage Under Fire x 3
- Hidden & Dangerous: Action Pack x 3
- X-COM: Complete Pack x 3
- CivCity: Rome x 3
- Duke Nukem Forever collection x 4
- Railroad Tycoon 2: Platinum x 3
- Railroad Tycoon 3 x 3
- Sid Meier's Railroads! x 3
- The Golf Club 2019 Featuring PGA TOUR x 3
- WWE 2K BATTLEGROUNDS + Ultimate Brawlers Pass x 4
- BioShock: The Collection (EU region) x 2
- BioShock: The Collection (NA region) x 2
- Borderlands 3: Super Deluxe Edition
- PGA Tour 2K21 x 3
- Sid Meier's Civilization VI x 2
- XCOM: ULTIMATE COLLECTION x 4
LIST OF ALL HB LEFTOVERS - - 11-11 Memories Retold x 2
- 112 operator
- 198x
- 8 doors
- 911 Operator x 2
- A Case Of Distrust
- A plague tale: innocence x 2
- Aegis Defenders x 3
- Ageless x 3
- Agents Of Mayhem
- Alien Spidy
- American Fugitive x 2
- Amnesia: rebirth x 3
- Amnesia: The Dark Descent + Amnesia: A Machine for pigs
- Anna's Quest
- As Far As The Eye
- Ashampoo Photo Optimizer 7
- Automachef x 3
- Bartlow's Dread Machine
- Beholder 2
- Between the stars x 4
- Beyond the wire x 2
- Bionic Commando x 2
- Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night
- Book of Demons x 3
- Boomerang Fu
- Boreal Blade x 3
- Boundless
- Broken Age x 2
- Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
- Butcher
- Capitalism 2
- Car Mechanic Simulator 2018
- Carnival Games VR
- Civilization III x 2
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- Disjunction - gog
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LIST OF ALL FANATICAL LEFTOVERS - - Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
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- UNLOVED
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- Wick
- World's Dawn x 2
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AS OTHER KEYS (UNSURE IF UNUSED SO I WILL GO FIRST) - 10 Second Ninja X
- A story about my uncle
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- Chicken Assassin Reloaded
- Deponia: The Complete Journey x 2
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- THE HEX
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WANT
PayPal
MY REP Wishlist Gems
TF2 keys/ Csgo Cases
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2023.06.10 04:36 Boomer_Fin [US-MO] [H] broken-in Cherry MX Blacks, Switches, Keycaps [W] PayPal
Timestamp:
https://imgur.com/a/SoOwMVx Looking to offload some stuff, discounts can be discussed for bundles.
Prices do not include shipping
380 Broken-In HG Cherry MX Blacks (600k Actuations) - .50 ea.
Tecsee Coral x90 - $20
Tecsee Ice Grape x90 - $20
Kalih Box Reds x90 - $20
Gat G Pro Reds (harvested from a Q3) x 87 - $15
NPBT BOW (BNIB, Opened to inspect) - $35
NPBT Minty (Unused, Box is ripped) - $40
Akko Translucent ASA Caps (Black with Yellow legends) (Used for a few months, Shipped in bag) - $20
Domikey Vintage Spacebar Kit (BNIB) - $15
Comment before PM
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2023.06.10 04:35 ThrowRA658233 I 24F just got broken up with via text by ex M23. Is there something wrong with me?
Hi all long time lurker first time poster. I really need advice right now. So i (24f) have really had an awful time in love lately. And I mean awful. I got broken up with back in October by my at the time boyfriend of almost a year and a half and I didn’t enter the dating field until early March. Well in March I dated a guy then he ghosted after a month. Then i didn’t date again until April and in April I met this amazing guy I mean he was everything I wanted/could ever want, sweet funny, made me laugh, made me feel safe he likes animals, literally everything I look for in a guy! In the time that we were together we spent almost every weekend together and it was amazing I mean I thoroughly enjoyed it. He did as well, I stayed over at his a couple of times and hung out with his friends and one of his family members and it was all going great! I didn’t bring up the boyfriend word or girlfriend word until we were going to be intimate, when I said that being intimate was a boyfriend privilege. To which he asked if I wanted to be his girlfriend and I said yes. Well last weekend we went out with my friends and his family member that I met and it all seemed like it was going great, we all had a good time and got back to his place at a decent hour and the following day we all hung out. The next day he and I were hanging out and had a little tiny disagreement, but worked it out and cuddled on the couch before going home. Well When he was talking me home he almost said the L word a couple of times when we were kissing goodnight, and everything seemed alright. I went inside to go to bed. The next day everything seemed normal again, the usual texting pattern, the same energy, making plans! I mean we were planning to maybe do the county fair, then on Wednesday he responded to my message from earlier in the day at 12 AM. Then my message from Thursday morning went unanswered. Then today I sent him a video of some shorts I was thinking of buying and he didn’t respond. Until about fifteen minutes ago sending me this long basically break up text. Saying “I wanted to reach out and let you know what's been on mind lately. I want to be completely honest with you because I do care about you. I feel awful doing this over text, but felt this was the best way for me to get my thoughts out as clearly as possible. I think that your an incredible woman and love our time together but as I’ve just got out of a long term relationship just before moving out here. I just think that I’m not comfortable or ready for that commitment again right now. I'd love to remain friends if you're open to it. I'm here if you have any questions or want to talk at any time” I never told him anything about a serious or long term thing, rather I wanted solely to spend time with him and enjoy our time together. I did make jokes about keeping spare pajamas at his but I continually made a point to say it was a joke. At this point it seems like there’s something about me. Like maybe there’s something wrong with me like why else would this keep happening? I understand not wanting to get into a serious thing, I mean my ex and I were looking at rings for goodness sake! I really do think there’s something wrong with me if this continuously happens, all I want is to give someone other than my dogs all this love and affection I have inside. I’m wondering if someone could’ve even said something that caused him to change his mind. I mean that’s the only thing I can think of other than something being wrong with me Can anyone offer any insight?
submitted by
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2023.06.10 04:12 alexandria0408 Roleplay partner wanted!
Long term and detailed partner needed!
Detailed and long term partner wanted! Hi! I’m looking for someone who actually enjoys role playing! Not just skipping over a story to get to the dirty scenes! I like a build up of a good story before anything like that happens. I like someone who is detailed (more then 3 sentences, please don’t message if you don’t reply more then 3!) and response a decent bit!I like to roleplay first person pov.
These are the few plots I’ve been able to come up with
Werewolfxhuman (possessive male character)
Your the alpha of (whatever tribe you want it to be) Having a mate is a big deal, people respect you more especially when you bring an heir into the world. People have been doubting you lately because it makes you seem immature and a party animal. You were for sure that you had no mate, you looked everywhere. Until you saw me. 9/10 mates aren’t human. You are at a club one night and I’m their, you instantly knew I was your mate.
Plot 2
Strangers
I was on the run, I did nothing wrong besides the fact I think I killed my husband. He was a cop back home, a very abusive and drunk one at that. The night I left things got bad, I thought he was gonna kill me. I hit him over the head with a vase knocking him out. I grabbed my emergency bag that I kept hidden and left. I ran and ran until I got to a bus station. I went to a tiny town that I didn’t even know what state it was in. I cut and dyed my hair, changed my name from Hailey to Alexandria (Alex for short) I began working at a dinner. I bought a small old house in the middle of the woods with money I had saved up. I bought everything in cash so I couldn’t be traced. Little did I know my ex husband was fine and on the lookout for me. I met you at the dinner, you were a regular. You flirted with me here and there but it was nothing more. We end up getting close but in reality I’m not who I say I am.
Best friends little sister
I’ve grown up around you my whole life, you are practically another another brother to me. I had just started my freshman year in college and things took a turn for the worse. I was at a party one night and not so good things happened there. When they were done with me, they then dumped me on a random person lawn. My parents made me come home and take the rest of the year off. Since that night I haven’t spoke, I became mute. You and my brother are in school together a state away. You both are coming home from the summer, I haven’t seen you since my senior year. My brother came home for a week when everything happened. My parents are hoping with you both around I’ll finally come out of my shell a little since the assault.
Enemies to lovers
Your a single millionaire entrepreneur who's been offered the marriage of the daughter of a famous seasoned businessman, who is looking to revive his dying business and exploiting his daughter to do so in a forced arranged marriage upon here, but I’m a rebellious soul, not the one to submit easily or to submit at all, little did I know,I met the match I’ve always saught after in my mind. one who is open minded for a adventurious life and to break the taboos, one who's willing to show who he really is and lower his guards to the one they truly trust and cherish.
Ex lovers
We were together for 6 years, High school sweethearts to be exact. We went to the same college together after we graduated, you got in on a full ride scholarship for Baseball and I got in on a full ride for academics. Our sophomore year of college you ended up getting scouted for a big league at a big school. You never told me this cause you knew it would’ve broke my heart. Instead you just left one day, I walked into your dorm and everything was gone except for a letter with my name on telling me everything. You changed your number and in the letter told me not to follow you. You knew I’d give up everything to go with you and you didn’t want me to leave school. Except what you didn’t know is, I was coming to tell you I was pregnant. Our home town is small, im talking 500 is our population small. I left school and came home, I was the talk of the town. Your parents told me I had gotten knocked up and quit school. I came to one of your games to try and tell you before the secret had spread to you but you had security to ask me to leave. So ever since I stopped trying, your parents thought I got knocked up by some random guy and that’s exactly what they told you. I did everything alone and we did alright. I now have a 6 year old little boy, own a home, and a coffee shop. Everything was good till you decided to come home.
Farmers daughter
You didn’t have the best home life growing up. When you were about 12 my dad caught you trying to steal stuff from his barn. Instead of calling the cops, he offered you a job. Not only did he offer you a job but he offered you a home. Only rule, you couldn’t touch me. You and my older brother became best friends. Even though we are only 2 years apart you treated me like a child. Well I’m my eyes anyways. In reality you were always just protecting me growing up. After you and my brother graduated high school, the both of y’all took off to the army. The night before you left we slept together, confessed our love to each other, and then you disappeared for 5 years. I graduated and went off to college. I heard from my brother, I just didn’t hear from you. I didn’t know why but you were my first everything that night. I eventually moved on but that just ended me up in a abusive relationship. My parents absolutely adored my boyfriend who’s family owned one of the biggest ranch’s around. They couldn’t see his dark side cause they were blinded by the good….Finally, you and my brother were coming home. Which meant a huge welcome home party for the both of you. That meant we’d see each other for the first time in years since that night.
Please comment or message me if interested in any of these! Or we can come up with our own plot!
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2023.06.10 04:11 JustAnother_Opinion MoltenMCI V.S. RockstarMCI
Now some division has happened amongst some of the FNaF Fandom when it comes to solving some of these mysteries to the lore of the games, I shall throw my hat into the ring...
So firstly, let's start with analysis the Insanity Ending for starters
" It's only now that I understand the depth of the depravity of this...creature - this monster that I unwillingly helped to create. "
This is talking about how Henry
somehow caused William to go on a killing spree (Maybe cuz of The bite of 83'?)
" As if what he had already done wasn't enough, he found a new way to desecrate, to humiliate, to destroy. "
This implies that that something is being ruined by William.
Possibly either Fazbear's Fright the horror attraction to
humiliate the souls or something with the follow me minigames.
" As if the suffering wasn't enough, the loss of innocence, the loss of everything to so many people. "
Possibly talking about The Missing Children's Incident & how the souls are now consumed by the monstrosity of what they've become.
" Small souls trapped in prisons of
my making now set to new purpose and used in ways I never thought imaginable. "
This is where it gets a bit
wonky here.
Either he is talking about how they've given themselves a purpose to hunt down anyone that remotely looks similar to William or that William fused them into the Funtime Animatronics and used them to kill more kids.
" He lured them all back. Back to a familiar place. Back with familiar tricks. He brought them all together. "
Talking about
Follow Me, since they were killed in the saferoom.
" Are they still aware? I hope not. It keeps me awake at night. "
I mean... do I really need to explain this part?
" I could make myself...sleep. But not yet. Not until I undo what he has done and heal this wound - a wound first inflicted on me, but then one that I let bleed out to cause all of this. "
Possibly talking about how William
game-ended Charlie outside of either Fredbear's or The first Freddy's but, like any murderer, he kept nappin' them kids.
" He set some kind of trap. I don't know what it was, but he lead them there again. He overpowered them again. And he robbed them of the only thing that they had. Again. "
Maybe something to do with Shadow Freddy? He basically destroyed their vessels so technically he robbed them of their afterlives.
" I don't know how those tiny breaths of life came to inhabit those machines. "
Give Gifts. Give Life.
" But they will never find rest now. Not like this. I have to call them all back. All of them. Together in one place. "
Either he is talking about all of the Scrap Animatronics or talking about the MCI & Charlie.
Now,
The Candy Cadet Stories Some assume that it talks about William putting the MCI into the funtime animatronics, but the stories talk about a good thing trying to put fives things together because of a negative thing... plus, it talks about fives things becoming one... MoltenMCI states that the MCI are mixed into one, yeah, but later split into 3 other Animatronics,
We're missing a step here. And then one final thing that also carries this whole thing...
The Fourth Closet This is, we weren't ment to use the Silver Eyes Trilogy to solve the games, when the book came out, Scott made a post on steam saying that the books, again, are not ment to be used to solve the games, he did say that they do share a lot of familiar elements that both the books and games share, but mostly boils down to this
- William is bad guy & becomes Springtrap
- Charlie & Henry are good guys
- The Missing Children's Incident happened
- The Robots are possessed
- Elizabeth becomes Circus Baby
And Some other stuff but thats besides the point...
And also, The Amalgamation in the fourth closet is a separate entity that, yes, controls the Funtime Animatronics, but are
not in The Funtime Animatronics like MoltenMCI states
One thing is that some look over from that post, is that he said the books are a
reimagining of the games, Scott wants to tells stories, if you were a story teller, wouldn't you get just a little bit burned out on expanding the same story, you'd too want to make different stories like The Silver Eyes Trilogy or The Fazbear Frights books
Plus, we never see Golden Freddy in Follow Me, so if MoltenMCI were true, it would most likely be just the four spirit of Freddy, Bonnie, Chica & Foxy
Now, for RockstarMCI...
There isn't too much for this theory but it does have some...
Intresting evidence
And this goes back one of the games a lot of you dislike mostly...
FNaF AR In one of the datamined files of the game we get something called "Faz-Facts", It's mostly the same stuff that we already have conformation about...
But one of them states that
Rockstar Bonnie was
Developed from the original bonnie, not based off, witch is a whole other meaning, but
Developed, The Fourth Closet isn't ment to solve lore of the games, FNaF AR is...
But than again, The Rockstar Animatronics are not required to get the true ending of FNaF6, but some might say that "oh, they're just stored In a different room", look at the pizzeria in Security Breach, the labyrinth is
Under The main building of the FNaF6 location...
It isn't too hard to believe that the pizzeria itself took the least damage but the labyrinth took the hit, but also, if they were stored... why would we need to buy them if we already have them?
Now, from Henry's Ending speech, it implies that the MCI kids are in the labyrinth...
So...
where are they? There is a somewhat equal amount of evidence to go with & to go against both MoltenMCI & RockstarMCI...
So, which one is it?
Now... for me, I do have a somewhat explanation for what's going on...
This is just my opinion though, so don't downvote me into UCN with Cassidy...
But I think... They do not possess
anything NOW HOLD ON, HEAR ME OUT Think about it, in UCN when the mediocre melodies say their
spooky lines
Oroville elephant will say, with Cassidy in the background,
" He tried to release you. He tried to release US. But I'm not gonna let that happen. I will hold you here. I will KEEP you here. No matter how many times they burn us. "
No matter how many times they burn us...?
They would imply that Cassidy is attached to William, I mean, no wonder good ol' bill is still alive.
Even in the logbook, both Cassidy & The Crying Child are together, they seem to be tangled together in someway, and the logbook belonged to Michael Afton as well, so...
Maybe, Cassidy & The Crying Child is attached to William & Michael somewhat? It's kinda unclear...
But, if that can logic cam apply to Cassidy & The Cryint Child, who says it can't apply to the other spirits!
Also, after Follow Me, the spirits are freed from their animatronic vessels, but they didn't really have a choice since the Robots are in a
VERY damaged state.
And, where do they go? Happiest day possibly happens after FNaF6 cuz the MCI kids are in the labyrinth somewhere & the robots they were bound too are broken, so what happens to them? They kinda just... wander... going to pizzeria to pizzeria.
I know, it's unsatisfactory to lots of you, but not everything is satisfying, just how in some games, the good ending isn't the best ending...
Also, it let's us see the Funtimes as new characters (since some of you seem to dislike new characters now-a-days), cuz where are the implications that the MCI kids are on the sister location?
Anyways, that's all I really can say, I'm not really much a theorist so don't come banging down my door, I kinda just wanted to put my opinion out there, but if you want to believe one of those theories, go right ahead, don't let this post stop you from it cuz MoltenMCI is a decent way to look a things (despite it's flaws).
As always, see y'all on the flip side!
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2023.06.10 04:04 SKwiatks Written In the Stars ch. 15: Down With the Sickness part 2
Now, I love Lou, but had to think of something to get two certain characters to Ericson to help save his life. One of them is a relative to one of the kids as the school. And after this chapter, Clem, will start to loosen her prejudice over Maya when they start to bond and work together to save Louis's life. She will start to look at Maya, and sees what Violet sees in her.
Over the next couple of days, Louis's pain in his lower right abdomen started to burn and hurt like hell. He thought it was hungry pains and found himself not hungry. Or it was weird after-sex pain that lasts several days after having sex the first time. Louis ignored the pain and eased up for quite some time when he, Aasim, and Willy were out hunting.
Louis fought through the pain of taking the rabbit out of the snare and held his side. Louis has a cold sweat now forming on his brow. Am I getting sick or something? Better not be. I am needed for hunting. Louis must be kneeling for quite some time as Aasim comes back hauling two rabbits.
"Dude you're okay?" Aasim looks at his friend.
Louis slowly rises and holds his right side. "Yeah...just...heartburn."
Aasim's eyebrows raise in concern, "Lou, you're not fine. You're sweating and it is freezing out."
"Let's just get the rest of the traps set for Thumper to run into them if they ever come out." Louis waves off Aasim's concern.
"Still think you should see Ruby." Aasim looks at him.
"Will you stop worrying about me? I'm fine, I don't need—" Louis pauses as he feels his stomach turn. Louis starts to gag and runs to a side of the tree and pukes.
Aasim drops the kills and tends to his friend. Aasim approaches Louis and sees him turning a different shade of color, "Come on, let's get you back home. Willy and I will set the traps later. You need to see Ruby now. Vomiting is not an indicator of fine Louis," Aasim spoke.
Louis nods and holds his right abdomen, as the pain steadily worsens. Willy finishes catching a rabbit and looks as Aasim walks close to Louis and sees Louis's pale brown now, "What is wrong with him?"
"Louis is sick. Taking him back to see Ruby. Take what we caught to Omar, and you and I will reset the traps later this evening." Aasim said.
"It is just the stomach bug, Aasim," Louis spoke, trying not to make it a big deal.
"Maybe, but let's have Ruby verify it first, okay." Aasim walks with him.
"Okay... I think you are wasting your girl's talents on something silly as the stomach bu—" Louis then felt a sharp pain now in his lower right side as it causes him to fall to his knees with a thud.
"Louis!" Aasim rushes to his side and sees his friend holding his side. "Shit.."
Willy looks to Aasim, "What is happening to him? Stomach bugs usually don't make people faint, do they?"
"No, they don't. Come on, I need your help." Aasim instructs Willy on what to do, and the rest of the way back Aasim carries Louis on his shoulder.
Violet is on watch duty when she sees Aasim carrying Louis, and she rushes down from the watch tower to open the gate. Once Aasim and Willy are through the gate, Violet asks, "What happened?"
"I don't know. We need to see Ruby ASAP. Something majorly is wrong with Louis." Aasim told Violet.
"She's in the greenhouse with Clementine." Violet pointed in the direction of the greenhouse.
Aasim nodded, "Willy, go fetch her and meet me in the nurse's station. Violet go to the library and find a medical book, any medical book."
"Why a medical—" Violet started to say.
"Because I think we are going to need it to find out exactly what is wrong with Louis," Aasim spoke. He heaves Louis up the stairs to the admin building. It was a long tiring climb but he laid Louis down on a soft bed in the nurse's station.
Violet comes in first with the book Aasim requested and didn't take long before Clementine and Ruby are at the door. Clementine rushes to be at her lover's side. She felt Louis's head as he breaks out in a cold sweat, and he looked pale. Clementine looks at Aasim, "What happened? What is wrong with him?"
Aasim rubs the back of his neck, "I don't know. He was acting strange when we were hunting and trying to reset the snares when Louis started to vomit, and then as we were walking back, he fainted and hasn't woken up since. He was favoring his right side."
Ruby stands by Louis and touches his forehead, "He's got a fever, that is for sure."
Clementine looks into Ruby's blue eyes, "Stomach bug?"
Aasim shook his head, "Stomach bugs don't make people faint. Or have severe lower abdominal pains"
Violet reaches for the book Aasim requested and asks Aasim to list off Louis's symptoms, "Aasim give me Louis's symptoms again."
Aasim looked at Violet and started to list off his symptoms, "He has a fever, vomited out in the woods, and been holding his lower right side. And fainted."
Violet looks to Clementine who is near Louis's right side, "Clem lift up Louis's shirt and lightly feel around where his hip is."
Clementine looks at Violet and does precisely what she instructed. When she touches the tender spot on Louis's stomach Louis groans, and his fist slams the bed, and he hugs his body. Violet looks and finds what is wrong with him, "Fuck...his appendix ruptured."
Clementine looks at her, "How do you know that?"
"A girl who used to live here, Maddy. Her appendix ruptured, and Ms. Martin had to take her to the hospital." Violet spoke.
Violet handed the medical book to Ruby and pointed the medical term out to her. Clementine looks at Louis and then back at the two girls, "Okay...what do we do? Pain meds."
Violet eyes Aasim and Ruby, and Ruby is first to speak, "Clem, Louis needs more than just medicine. He needs surgery."
Clementine eyes widen, "Surgery?! But we don't have that option around here." Clementine took her gaze off the two girls and looked at Louis, who looked to be in pain. She closes her eyes and is afraid to ask this question to get an answer she is afraid to hear. Clementine reopens her eyes and looks at Ruby, "What happens if Louis can't get surgery?"
Ruby reads what would happen if the appendix is not removed in time, and she is afraid to answer Clementine. Clementine looks to her as the only medical person in this school who know this stuff, "Well?"
Ruby swallows hard, "Louis could die Clem."
Clementine face falls and she holds his hand, and her eyes squeeze shut. She reopens them and looks at Ruby with tears in her eyes, "Can you do it? Or look it up somewhere on how to do it?"
"Clem...I...I know little about this kind of stuff. I didn't go to med school, I could make it worse." Ruby's voice broke.
"You're the best bet I have, Ruby!" Clementine raises to her feet.
"I'm not a surgeon, Clem. I only know basic medical knowledge of what Ms. Martin told me." Ruby looks at Clementine with empathy and wishes she knew more, but she doesn't.
The whole time when Clementine and Ruby are talking, Violet eyes Louis. Maya! Maya knows how to heal people. Maybe she can help Louis. Violet fixes her eyes on Clementine, "Maya might know how to help Louis."
Clementine and Ruby both turn to look at Violet. Clementine crosses her arms and eyes, Violet, "And how will your girlfriend know how to fix him? He needs a surgeon Vi, not an herbalist."
"Clem, Ruby needs help, and Maya knows some medical knowledge here that can help save Louis. It is not like we got a choice here in picking doctors here. I know you have trust issues with Maya, but she can help Clementine." Violet ignores the comment on her girlfriend, which Violet had every right to tell Clementine off but chooses not to as Louis needs her help more than her feud with Clementine.
Ruby looks to Clementine, "I can use another set of hands from a healer. And she is right. We don't have many options to choose from if we want to save Louis. If Violet can bring Maya here, the better."
Clementine looks to Ruby and then to Violet, and then her gaze rests on Louis, whose life is hanging in the balance. Clementine closes her eyes to think as she doesn't have much of an option but to take up Violet's offer and bring Maya here to inspect Louis and work with Ruby to save him. Clementine sighs, "Fine. But take Aasim with you. I don't want anyone from her group to come and know about this place, got it? Especially Arvo and Bonnie." Violet turns to her friend, and the two of them leave the nurses' station.
...
Violet and Aasim walk in the woods as Violet leads him down the pathway she takes to meet Maya. Aasim told her, "I am surprised Clem is being civil on this matter."
"Louis's life is on the line. So, she doesn't have much choice to hold onto her pride." Violet murmurs. "She loves him, and people will do anything to keep the person they love alive. I would have done the same thing if Maya was like this." Violet admitted.
Aasim looks at her, "Speaking of which, how do you know where she will be? Or know her whereabouts in her camp?"
Violet looks to him and then her eyes forward, "We worked out a coding system of leaving messages close by an opening in the wall by her tent in her group's camp. How she treated my shoulder a few days ago. Ruby is good, but the stuff Maya uses is better." Violet admitted. "Don't tell Ruby I said that. I'm grateful for her skill of taking care of me and everyone, but something about the stuff Maya uses...it is better, and feels like there are some magical healing properties."
Aasim holds out his hands, "I won't, and pretend I didn't hear you prefer your girlfriend's stuff over Ruby's."
Violet smiles a little, then focus on getting to Maya to help Louis. They are nearing Maya's group encampment, and she signals to Aasim to be quiet and follow her lead. They didn't get far into the caravan's territory when Violet pulled Aasim behind a bush for cover as they saw a red hair woman, Maya, and Aniya. Aasim whispers to Violet, "How are we going to get her away from those two."
Violet watches her girlfriend and notices they just come back from hunting. She looked and thought of a way to get her attention, "Stay here,"
Aasim looks at her, "Violet. No, this is suicide. We will wait for her to be alone."
"Louis may not have that kind of time, Aasim. Every minute counts, and Louis needs that surgery, now!" Violet hisses. "I will go and get her attention. Wait here, please!" Violet inches closer and closer behind the three females as the redhead is carrying a small bore and two rabbits. Maya had a bow and a quiver of arrows.
Maya looked back and halted in her tracks as she heard footsteps behind them or nearby. Bonnie notices her slight absence, "Something wrong, Maya?"
Maya peers through the trees as she holds up a finger to her leader to stay quiet momentarily. Maya zeros in on the sound and looks to see Violet. Her eyes widened, and she had to think of something, "I thought I heard something back there. But I guess it was a bird or a walker. There are those still around." Maya turns back, and with her foot, she writes a one and an m in the dirt for Violet to see. It was a subtle motion that Bonnie or her sister never saw what Maya did with her foot. Maya turns back and follows Bonnie and her sister up the trial that led to their encampment.
Violet waited until the three of them were out of sight, and she went to the spot where Maya paused, and in the dirt, she wrote one m. Violet took that to mean one moment or one minute. Violet nods and goes to where Aasim is hiding. "Okay, she saw me and wrote a message in the dirt. She will be with us momentarily. She needs to find a way to sneak away from her group. Give her a few minutes." Violet spoke.
"But you said." Aasim started to say.
"I know, but I also don't want us or her to get in trouble here," Violet answers him. "I'm going about this in a smart way where we don't have spilled blood. Just trust in her, okay." Violet grips the tree with her hand.
They waited five minutes or so when Violet heard Maya's sweet voice calling her, "Vi? Violet?"
Violet peers out from the bush and motions for Aasim to get up with her, "Maya over here."
Maya comes to Violet and hugs her. Violet melted in her embrace and loved the soft touch Maya brought in her warm hugs. Violet holds onto Maya longer than she planned, but her heart got in the way. Aasim saw the love Maya and Violet shared with each other and kindly made his presence known to them. Violet snaps out of her love moment and pulls back from Maya. Maya sees Aasim, and she looks at Violet, "Okay..this is new. You brought a friend with you."
"Clementine's idea, not mine. I will cut to the chase. Louis needs your help, Maya." Violet spoke gently to her.
Aasim looks to this Indian girl, "Violet says you are good with medicine and are knowledgeable with medical procedures. is that right?"
"Yes on some, what is this about?" Maya looks at the two of them.
"We need your help in helping Louis. His appendix ruptured, and he needs surgery. Clementine said you won't be a help because you are an herbalist, but I know you can help him." Violet urges her girlfriend.
Maya looks into Violet's eyes with sympathy, "Vi, I love you, and great you have faith in my skill as a healer. I hate to agree with your leader Clementine here, but she is right. I, too, don't have any knowledge of surgical procedures. I never was trained to be one, not even out in Jackson when studying to be a healer in my Tribe."
Violet looks into her lover's eyes, "So you can't help us?"
"I didn't say that entirely. I am not a surgeon, but I know someone who is or used to be one. Someone in my group was one before the zombie outbreak happened. I can go get him." Maya looks at Aasim and Violet. Maya eyes Aasim, "If that is okay?"
Violet looks at Maya and nods, "Go."
Maya nods and heads back down the pathway she came from. Aasim watches her go and leans to Violet, "Vi, we came to get Maya not bring others to the school."
"Maya knows her group members, and one of them just happens to be the miracle Louis needs. We are going to bring them back to the school rather Clem likes the idea or not. Not like we can go ask anybody else here if they know surgery." Violet spoke.
Aasim heaves a sigh, "I just don't know how I feel about this, Vi."
Violet looks at him, "I'm doing this to save Louis. And this person in Maya's camp is our only option." Violet sighs, "I won't lose another friend when we can have a shot at saving him. I won't lose someone else I care for. Not you, Louis, Clementine, Tenn, or Maya., not today not ever."
....
Maya enters through the hole and she secretly sneaks out. Maya sees Bonnie by the campfire and Alberto chopping away at some fresh kill. Aniya was playing with Alicia keeping her occupied as Maya zeros in on Robert's tent. Maya sneaks in and finds him snoozing on his cot. With a deep breath, Maya approaches him, "Robert. Robert, I need you to wake up." Robert was still in a deep slumber and groaned a little.
Maya then goes by his arm and pinches him hard to get him awake. Robert sprung up, "Son of a bitch! Who the Fu—" Robert looks at Maya, "What are you doing?"
"I need you," Maya spoke.
"With what? You don't look to be injured or need medical treatment." Robert eyes her.
Maya took a deep breath, "I need your skills as a surgeon, Robert. And I need you to come with me to my girlfriend's camp. Louis needs your help."
When Maya mentions Louis's name Robert sits up, "What happened to my son?"
"His appendix ruptured. He needs a surgeon, and he needs an operation, like now, he needs you." Maya looks at him.
Robert closes his eyes. "Maya, I can't." Robert looks away, "I..."
Maya goes and kneels down to him and places her hands on Robert's knees. "I know this pain you caused runs deep."
"It is not that Maya, I can...I can possibly kill him. I haven't been in the OR since the outbreak happened. And I don't have the equipment if things go south. What if I.." Robert shakes his head, "There is a reason surgeons are not allowed to do surgery on our own families or be near the operating room. We get too involved."
"Robert, Louis needs you now more than ever. I have seen how you tried to care for Mike after he got bit. But the difference between Mike and your son Mike was already too far gone to be fixed, where there is still time to save your son. You can do this, Rob." Maya squeezes her pressure on his knee. "Rob, Louis doesn't have much time. If you want that reunion with your son, you need to step up here. Otherwise, you might not get another opportunity. Please."
Robert lets out a sigh and then raises his gaze to look at Maya, "Okay. Take me to him."
Maya raises to her feet and heads out of his tent. Robert comes after her shortly, and when Maya starts to head to the opening where she sneaks out, Robert pulls her back, "We need a better plan to get out of camp. Because of this outing we are doing Maya, is going to raise questions. Especially Arvo and Alberto."
"Okay, doc, you have any ideas?" Maya eyes him.
Robert looks at the gate and then at his medical tent, "Actually, I do. Wait here." Robert goes to his med tent and grabs the supplies he needs for surgery. Maya paces in the sandy dirt while she waits. It took several moments as she watched Robert approach Bonnie and started talking to her. Maya couldn't make out their conversation, but she was surprised when Bonnie gave the okay. Robert then nodded and walked back to Maya. "Okay, all set, let's go."
Maya had a confused look as she followed Robert to the main gate. Arvo peers over the ledge and yells out, "Where are you two going?"
Robert looked at Arvo and calmly said without a nervous tone back at him, "Maya and I will be going into that small town little ways down the river looking for more medical supplies. I am running low on bandages and drugs. We will be back sometime this evening or late in the night. I cleared it with Bonnie."
Arvo eyes Maya suspiciously, "And why do you need her?"
"To watch my back in case I run into trouble with walkers," Robert said. "And to help me carry supplies back for the group."
Arvo sneers, "Think it is a waste but fine. Go."
Robert nods and motions to Maya to get a move on. Once they were away from the main gate, Maya looked up at him, "You really need supplies Rob, or was that a lie to cover up what you will help me with."
"Well, I still have bandages left, and some drugs, but will not have enough for our group after when I perform this surgery on my son. So in a way, it wasn't a total lie. Just won't be going to that town but to Ericson." Robert told her with his eyes forward.
Maya looks at him and can't believe he went against his own instincts and kind of lied to Bonnie. Just comes to show her how much Robert cares for his son. Maya then leads Robert to where Aasim and Violet are hiding. Maya looks at Robert, "Before you meet them, they are not too keen to have adults in their camp, and don't argue with them to pose you are a threat. Listen to everything they say, as we are on their turf, got it?"
Robert looks at her, "Why so hostile? Do they not have any adults?"
"Violet told me all the adults left when the world turned to shit and left the children at the school you sent your son to, to fend for themselves. So yeah they have trust issues with adults and do not take kindly to them. Promise me you will remain calm and not threatening." Maya advises Robert.
Robert nods, "Okay I promise." Maya nods and takes Robert down the path to the brush where Violet and Aasim are at.
Once Maya comes to the spot Aasim and Violet are shocked when a man in his early 40s comes with Maya. Aasim looks to Violet and Violet looks back at him. Maya looks back at them, "Okay I brought the only person I know who can help Louis. Led us to your camp." Aasim eyes Robert and Maya and before he can say anything, Violet urges them to head toward Ericson.
...
The walk to Ericson was tense as Maya felt the tension of Aasim's stare. The only thing keeping her somewhat calm was looking and gazing at Violet. She can sense she is worried for her friend as she keeps her distance a little bit from her. Maya half wanted to walk side by side with her lover to have Maya be her rock, and for Violet to help ease Maya's stormy seas.
The sun was just a little past noon when they walked into unfamiliar land that Maya had never seen before. They walk across a bridge and strange markings in the trees with ropes hanging down. Maya steals a glance at Robert as he looks back at her. The last time he saw this place was when it was still functional. So seeing the condition of the school now was a foreign concept to Robert. Up ahead Maya sees the iron gates she saw in her vision of Violet's past. And the walls and the towering building structures that lie beyond that gate.
As they got closer to the entrance to the gate of the school, Maya saw a sign that read 'Don't Fuck with Us!' next to a dead man tied around a tree whose body was half decomposed. Maya looked to the right on the edge of the school wall was a cart of some kind. She was distracted as the little boy named AJ shot a warning shot at them. Aasim comes up from behind Robert and Maya and yells, "No, AJ, don't shoot! We need them."
AJ comes down as Willy and Ruby usher in the new guests and Violet and Aasim. Ruby looks to her boyfriend, "I thought we were just getting Maya, not a fucking adult."
Aasim looks at her, "She says he is a surgeon Ruby."
"And you think bringing an adult man to school is a good idea, Aasim?" Ruby asks.
"What choice do we have. Louis needs a surgeon, and this guy is the best we got," Aasim admitted.
Ruby heaves a sigh, "Alright, Clem will not be pleased about this."
Violet talked with AJ to stand down and not threaten Maya and Robert, as Aasim talks with Ruby. Violet glances a worried glance at her girlfriend for bringing her inside her group's walls. She longed for this moment to happen, but not in this way.
Ruby and Aasim come back to Robert and Maya, "Take it one of you is the surgeon?"
Maya nudges Robert, as Robert comes forward, "Yes...I was told someone in your group needs medical treatment."
Ruby then orders, "Follow me."
Maya nods for Robert to follow the redhead with a southern accent as Maya awkwardly awaits by the walls of Ericson. Maya sees the weird looks of a boy Maya has never seen before with short brown hair. Another little boy with a burn scar across the right side of his face. And another teenage boy with puffy afro hair by a campfire staring at her. So this is where Violet lives. Huh, not what I envisioned. Maya looks around the structure. Sees good strong walls, and almost feels like home a little. And another strange feeling, Maya almost sees this is an excellent place to bring her sister, and they no longer have to feel threatened by walkers or any adult figure threatening them. It is the home Maya longs to give her little sister and to have a future with Violet.
Maya stood there and was about to sit by the stone wall of the gate when Violet came and stood next to her, "Come on, you don't have to be so standoffish, and look suspicious."
Maya eyes her girlfriend, "I get looks from your group members that they don't trust me, and I want to earn their trust some and not pose a threat."
"Standing by the gates, Maya is kind of sending a weird message. And we've been through a lot, so bringing anyone new into our walls, my group is hesitant about. Besides, Aasim told me to have you sit at a picnic table while your friend—is talking with Clementine." Violet said in a soft voice to ease Maya's anxieties. She then takes hold of Maya's hand and leads her to a picnic table close to the admin building, as they wait on the news of Louis.
....
Clementine holds Louis's hand as she waits for Violet and Aasim to return with Maya for help. She heard a knock on the door as Ruby came in with a person she least expected to see. Clementine got worried, and before she had a chance to speak, Ruby explained the situation, "Clem, before you start, this is Robert. He has come to help Louis. That is it."
Ruby nods for Robert. Robert nervously came forth as Maya was not kidding these kids had been through hell. Robert had seen this girl before, the prosthetic foot girl several weeks back who let Alberto, Aniya, and him go. Clementine was just as shocked to see him again too. Clementine slowly spoke, "You're a surgeon?"
Robert nods, "Been one for the past 24 years. Maya told me you have someone that has a dire need for surgery."
Clementine was still shocked and speechless this man was kind and not threatening to her, which was the first she saw in an adult figure that was not trying to fuck her over. And in some odd way, he has the same gentleness as Louis. Clementine looks to Ruby and then to this humbled man. "Louis is over here."
Clementine led this man of about 40 years of age by the bedside of the small nurses' station. Robert's blood runs cold as he sees his son looking so sick. And he felt like he was going to vomit. He doesn't want to give away to his son's girlfriend that that is his son, but Clementine is already starting to make some connection that this man is related to her boyfriend.
Robert examines his son's abdomen, and Maya's diagnosis is right on the money. Robert turns to the two girls standing at the end of the bed, "Okay, I am going to need assistance here. Out of the two of you, who has more medical care skills and is not afraid of blood and guts? If both of you aren't, I am going to need Maya's help."
Clementine looked to Ruby, and Ruby came forth, "I am the healer here."
"That counts for something." Robert looks at the young redhead. "What's your name, kid."
"Ruby." Ruby offered out her name.
When Clementine heard Robert speak the word kid, had the same wavelength as Louis's voice. Clementine looks at her boyfriend and then at the man standing over him. Same eyes as Louis, even down to the same kind of freckles around his nose, cheeks, a little bit of his chest, and hands. Clementine looks at Robert and ponders. No, he can't be. Louis had a falling out with his father. Why would his father come to him now? What broke Clementine's thoughts was a soft touch of Ruby's hand on her arm, "Clem, we need you to vacate the room."
"No, I am not leaving him, Ruby. I love him. What if something happens, and I am not there in his last moments." Clementine protests. "He is the love of my life Ruby!"
Ruby held onto her leader's cheeks, "I promise to come to get you, but Clementine, we need this space to work and save Louis's life here. Please wait outside. I will fetch you when he is through. Please."
Clementine closes her eyes and reopens them to look back at Robert and then at Louis, and she slowly exits the room with a thorn in her heart. She knows Robert heard her calling Louis the love of her life.
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